{"id":1958,"date":"2013-02-11T13:55:11","date_gmt":"2013-02-11T18:55:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/?p=1958"},"modified":"2013-02-11T13:55:11","modified_gmt":"2013-02-11T18:55:11","slug":"lets-talk-about-sex-baby","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/lets-talk-about-sex-baby\/","title":{"rendered":"Let\u2019s Talk About Sex, Baby!"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Gladys Diaz<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Couple<\/a><\/p>\n

There are few experiences in life that allow two people to connect on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level as they do when they are making love to one another.<\/p>\n

Physical attraction is often referred to as \u201chaving chemistry.\u201d\u00a0 This is actually an accurate scientific term when you consider the fact that both men and women release a series of hormones during and after having sex and climaxing, including serotonin and oxytocin \u2013 also known as \u201cthe bonding hormone\u201d \u2013 which is the same hormone mothers release while nursing and creates a bond between the mother and child.\u00a0 \u00a0What many people don\u2019t know is that, while men are at the effect of oxytocin for a few hours, women can be at the effect of it for several<\/i> days<\/i>, which is why many women feel more bonded to a man after having had sex (a.k.a. \u201cthe clinging effect\u201d!).<\/p>\n

This is also why some women rush into having sex with or becoming physically intimate with a man in other ways long before they are emotionally ready to do so.\u00a0 In an attempt to create a feeling of connection and intimacy with a man they are getting to know and are very attracted to, they may give in to the physical attraction and desires and experience a false sense of connection to him on an emotional and\/or spiritual level.\u00a0 If the man is not ready to commit or to at least agree to date her exclusively, she is then left feeling used, unfulfilled, and disappointed.<\/p>\n

There is no question that when we begin to really like someone, our minds have a tendency to float into the possible future of what might happen, should things work out.\u00a0 We want so much to experience the feeling of being loved, cherished, and desired that it\u2019s easy to lose sight of the fact that there are emotional consequences to moving too quickly or trying to force something to happen before we really know the person.\u00a0 And, many times, a woman can be quicker and more willing to get in bed with someone to create this connection than she is to be emotionally vulnerable and allow him to see who she really is \u2013 all<\/i> of who she really is.\u00a0 This decision has tremendous consequences and can lead to having a string of lovers, but never truly experiencing the different phases of a real relationship, which is what her heart truly desires.<\/p>\n

So, what are some steps women can take to protect themselves from causing and experiencing unnecessary heartache due to having sex with someone prematurely?<\/p>\n

1.<\/strong> \u00a0Know what you really<\/i> want.<\/b>\u00a0 If you know that what you want is to be in a loving, committed relationship, then stand for that.\u00a0 Before you allow things to get too hot and heavy (because, let\u2019s face it, these things never \u201cjust happen\u201d — they build up), then honor that for yourself.\u00a0 Don\u2019t make the guy responsible for honoring that.\u00a0 He wanted to have sex with you the moment he winked at you online or walked over to you and started a conversation.\u00a0 You\u2019re responsible for creating the life and relationship you want, so stand for that!<\/p>\n

2.\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong> Really get to know someone before getting sexually\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 intimate with him.<\/b>\u00a0 Yes, I know it\u2019s 2013 and not 1913.\u00a0 And, yes, I know it seems old-fashioned to tell someone that you\u2019d like to wait before having sex, but this is your<\/i> life and your<\/i> heart we\u2019re talking about.\u00a0 If you know that sleeping with someone makes you feel connected to him emotionally, then just honor your desire to be in a committed relationship with someone before sleeping with him.<\/p>\n

\u00a0 3.\u00a0 <\/b>You don\u2019t have to \u201clay down the law,\u201d just don\u2019t lay down with him! <\/b>Don\u2019t worry about telling him that you won\u2019t have sex on the first, third, or sixth date in an effort to make sure he doesn\u2019t try anything (P.S. He\u2019s<\/i> going to try<\/i>.\u00a0 Don\u2019t take it personally, or take it as a compliment. Just know he\u2019s going to try!).\u00a0 This isn\u2019t a topic that needs to be brought up ahead of time or in an effort to stop his advances.\u00a0 When the situation arises, and before things gets out of hand, just let him know that you prefer to wait until you\u2019re in a committed relationship.\u00a0 That doesn\u2019t mean he has to<\/i> ask you to be his girlfriend or make a commitment to you.\u00a0 He gets to choose, just as you do.\u00a0 But let him know you\u2019d like to wait\u2026 and then avoid putting yourself in a situation where you won\u2019t.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/b>As modern an age as we live in, most women still want to be in a loving, committed relationship with a man who chooses them and only <\/i>them. \u00a0If that\u2019s what your heart truly desires, then own, embrace, and stand for that.\u00a0 Just as sleeping with a man won\u2019t make him commit to you, choosing to wait to sleep with a man won\u2019t make him leave you.\u00a0 And if a guy does choose to leave you because you say that you prefer to wait, be grateful that you learned of his willingness to commit to you early on in the relationship.\u00a0 The bottom line is that you get to create the relationship of your dreams.\u00a0 And you\u2019ve got to be willing to stand for that and know that, not only are you deserving of all the love and intimacy your heart desires, but you are also worth the wait!<\/p>\n

Comments? \u00a0Questions? \u00a0Let us know! We love hearing from you!<\/p>\n

Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

by Gladys Diaz There are few experiences in life that allow two people to connect on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level as they do when they are making love to one another. Physical attraction is often referred to as \u201chaving chemistry.\u201d\u00a0 This is actually an accurate scientific term when you consider the fact that […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,9,13,16,22,23],"tags":[47,57,63,68,87,94,105],"class_list":["post-1958","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dating-2","category-hdi-blog","category-intimacy-2","category-love-2","category-relationship-advice","category-romance","tag-dating","tag-hearts-desire-international","tag-intimacy","tag-love","tag-relationship-advice-2","tag-sex","tag-women"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1958","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1958"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1958\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1958"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1958"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1958"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}