{"id":2332,"date":"2013-06-09T00:00:38","date_gmt":"2013-06-09T05:00:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/?p=2332"},"modified":"2013-06-09T00:00:38","modified_gmt":"2013-06-09T05:00:38","slug":"he-cheated-on-me-now-what","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/he-cheated-on-me-now-what\/","title":{"rendered":"He Cheated on Me… Now What?"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Gladys Diaz<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0\"Woman<\/a><\/p>\n

I have been dating with my boyfriend for 3years and recently I found out that he had some affairs with other girls. When I confronted him, he told me nothing but that he was feeling he needed validation from other people. Then some days later he called me up and ended the relationship saying that he is not ready yet, that I was too good for him now, and that I should give him time to better himself. I felt so bad, so much so, that this situation affected my academics, and now I have been asked to withdraw from my course because I was not able to pass a certain number of papers. I feel so depressed and confused.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

I really want to get out of this situation. I have taken sometime to forgive myself and forgive him.\u00a0 I have cut all contacts with him. I just want to be able to focus on what makes me happy right now. Right now I am in a dilemma because I am still not able to figure out what is next. I really need your help because I always find myself hoping things will get better with him someday. I really am myself when I am with him and he is a nice person.<\/p>\n

I think that one of the most painful things a person can go through is being betrayed by someone they love.\u00a0 Creating a relationship involves so much vulnerability and the willingness to open our heart to someone, all the while knowing that there are no guarantees and that we might get hurt. Knowing this, however, doesn\u2019t make the pain any less severe when we find that the person has betrayed our trust.<\/p>\n

I know you refer to your ex-boyfriend as \u201ca nice person,\u201d and it\u2019s possible that he\u2019s very kind.\u00a0 However, it sounds from your email that there was more than one case of infidelity.\u00a0 \u00a0So, as nice or kind as he may be, if he\u2019s incapable of being faithful to you, then he simply is not the right guy for you. \u00a0The truth is that you deserve to be with someone who chooses to be with you and only you<\/i><\/b>.<\/p>\n

If your ex had chosen to take responsibility for the infidelity, apologized and promised to be faithful and commit to making the relationship work, I\u2019d tell you that, while it makes the journey a little more difficult once the trust has been broken in the relationship, with support, it is possible to truly forgive, recommit, and make things work.<\/p>\n

The fact that he said he needs time to work on bettering himself, that he doesn\u2019t feel you deserve him, and he\u2019s not ready to commit to you right now, while painful to hear, is probably the kindest and most loving thing he could have done.\u00a0 Rather than continue to lie or pretend that he\u2019s in this relationship 100%, he\u2019s choosing to let you go, stop hurting you and, hopefully, focus on himself.\u00a0 This is actually something for which you can be grateful.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I hear you saying that you want to do the same and focus on what makes you<\/i> happy right now, and that\u2019s exactly what I\u2019d recommend.\u00a0 This is the time to really focus on what you want for yourself and your life.<\/strong>\u00a0 If being in school is something that is important to you and having that career is something you really want, then I\u2019d recommend speaking to whoever you need to speak to regarding what you can do to get back on track.\u00a0 If you haven\u2019t been pampering yourself, taking time to just relax and replenish your heart, body, and spirit, now is the time to begin scheduling those things into your day.\u00a0 If you have girlfriends or family members who will support you in moving forward with your dreams, then surround yourself and spend time with them.<\/p>\n

This is the time for you to take responsibility for your own happiness and to really focus on becoming the woman you were created to be.\u00a0<\/strong> This <\/i><\/b>is what is going to help you feel more confidence, joy, fulfillment, and peace of mind and heart.\u00a0 And it\u2019s also what is going to make you very attractive <\/i><\/b>to the man who is right for you<\/i><\/b>.\u00a0 He will see your joy, confidence, and peace, and will be attracted to you and to the idea of adding to that happiness.<\/p>\n

As for your ex and holding onto hope that things will get better, I know it\u2019s difficult, but, if what you want is to experience a relationship where you are loved, honored, and respected, then you\u2019re probably going to need to let go and close this chapter of your life so that you can begin to create the next one<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Trust that everything is happening just as it should.<\/strong>\u00a0 Trust that you found out for a reason and that the relationship ended for a reason.\u00a0 And trust that you can and will have a relationship where the man chooses to love, to commit, and to be with you and only you<\/i><\/b>, because that is what you deserve!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Comments?\u00a0 Questions?\u00a0 Let us know.\u00a0 We love hearing from you!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

by Gladys Diaz \u00a0 I have been dating with my boyfriend for 3years and recently I found out that he had some affairs with other girls. When I confronted him, he told me nothing but that he was feeling he needed validation from other people. Then some days later he called me up and ended […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,6,10,11,12,16,17,22],"tags":[37,39,47,57,58,68,87,91,97,105],"class_list":["post-2332","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-breakups","category-dating-2","category-hearts-desire-international","category-heartache","category-infidelity","category-love-2","category-marriage","category-relationship-advice","tag-breakups","tag-cheating","tag-dating","tag-hearts-desire-international","tag-heartbreak","tag-love","tag-relationship-advice-2","tag-self-care","tag-smcsfbc","tag-women"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2332","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2332"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2332\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2332"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2332"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2332"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}