{"id":2364,"date":"2013-06-15T09:30:33","date_gmt":"2013-06-15T14:30:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/?p=2364"},"modified":"2013-06-15T09:30:33","modified_gmt":"2013-06-15T14:30:33","slug":"when-the-man-you-love-is-married-to-someone-else","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/when-the-man-you-love-is-married-to-someone-else\/","title":{"rendered":"When the Man You Love is Married to Someone Else"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Gladys Diaz<\/span><\/p>\n

\"Naive_Love<\/a><\/p>\n

I have recently reconnected with a past friend\/relationship. There was no sex or desire to be with him then. Then one day 2yrs ago, I had a problem with my phone and contacted the company, and who came to my door… him! He was filling in for another guy who was on holidays. I think \u201cWhat\u2019s the chance of this happening?\u201d<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

It’s been 16yrs and we have both traveled and had lives. He is married and I’m a single parent. Our connection this time round is very strong and soulful. He said he loved me and my inner core was so happy.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

He is unhappy in his marriage and we have been talking and not gone to the next step. My thoughts are with him all day and he says he feels the same. I do love him, but where and what do we\/I do now? I close my eyes and I can see us together in the future. I haven’t had this before. Is he a soulmate?<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

I can see how having someone pop back into your life again after so many years could have you asking \u201cWhat\u2019s the chance of this happening?\u201d<\/em> and wondering whether this was \u201cmeant to be.\u201d I can also hear that you feel a deep connection to him and want to be with him.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re asking what you should do. I think a more important question for you to answer is, \u201cWhat do I want to experience in a relationship?\u201d This question is critical because, unless you know what you want, you will settle for what you think you can get. For the past two years, you have been involved with a married man. I acknowledge you for not taking it to the next step, and I also wonder why he\u2019s still married after two years if he\u2019s really that unhappy in his marriage and wants to be with you.<\/p>\n

Please understand that I\u2019m not saying this to be mean. This is your<\/em> choice to make and you know what works best for you. It just sounds like you have really fallen for\u00a0 and want a relationship with him and that you may have invested to years of your life in a man who is unavailable<\/strong> and unable to commit to you because he is still married to someone else.<\/p>\n

I have way too many stories of clients and friends who waited and waited for the man they were in love with to leave his wife, only to end up broken-hearted after several years. The fact of the matter is that until a man is divorced from his wife \u2013 not just \u201cseparated,\u201d but legally divorced<\/em> \u2013 he is still legally bound<\/em> to his wife. This makes him unavailable to anyone else, because, even if he wanted to marry someone else, right now, he couldn\u2019t, because it is illegal to do so.<\/p>\n

Some women will argue that the man says he is miserable and that the divorce is complicated, or that his wife won\u2019t agree to the terms. What I\u2019ve seen in my experience is that, when a man wants out, he gets out and figures out a way to deal with all of the complications.<\/p>\n

The fact that it\u2019s been two years and he\u2019s still married makes me wonder about just how unhappy he is and how willing he is to begin a life with you. I\u2019m not saying that he\u2019s lying about how unhappy he is. However, he is lying \u2013 at least to his wife \u2013 if she is unaware of what is going on and that he\u2019s been building this intimate friendship\/relationship with you.<\/p>\n

You ask what you should do now. The answer is going to come from what it is you<\/em> want to experience in a relationship. I can hear that what you want is a loving, intimate connection with a soulmate. You just need to ask yourself whether that dream relationship also includes being with a person who is faithful and completely committed to being with you and you, alone.<\/p>\n

If not, and you\u2019re willing to be involved with a married man, while I don\u2019t recommend it, then you can choose to proceed with allowing this relationship to move to another level. If, however, love, connection, commitment and fidelity are important to you, then, right now, this is not the right man for you, because he\u2019s simply unavailable.<\/p>\n

Either way, the choice of whether to continue with or end this relationship is yours to make. In choosing, I recommend that you think about what you really<\/em> want and then make the choice that honors that desire and leaves you feeling the most loved and fulfilled!<\/p>\n

Questions? Comments? Let us know below! We love hearing from you!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

by Gladys Diaz I have recently reconnected with a past friend\/relationship. There was no sex or desire to be with him then. Then one day 2yrs ago, I had a problem with my phone and contacted the company, and who came to my door… him! He was filling in for another guy who was on […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,9,10,11,12,16,17,22],"tags":[39,47,48,57,58,63,68,70,87,97,105],"class_list":["post-2364","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dating-2","category-hdi-blog","category-hearts-desire-international","category-heartache","category-infidelity","category-love-2","category-marriage","category-relationship-advice","tag-cheating","tag-dating","tag-divorce","tag-hearts-desire-international","tag-heartbreak","tag-intimacy","tag-love","tag-marriage-2","tag-relationship-advice-2","tag-smcsfbc","tag-women"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2364","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2364"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2364\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2364"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2364"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2364"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}