{"id":3056,"date":"2014-01-31T17:52:26","date_gmt":"2014-01-31T21:52:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/?p=3056"},"modified":"2014-01-31T17:52:26","modified_gmt":"2014-01-31T21:52:26","slug":"let-go-dead-end-relationship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/heartsdesireintl.com\/home\/let-go-dead-end-relationship\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Let Go of a Dead-End Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Gladys Diaz<\/span><\/p>\n

\"dead_end_sign_bing\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Recently, I was working with a client who was frustrated about the fact that her long-term boyfriend had not proposed.\u00a0 Who can blame her?\u00a0 When you invest a lot of time \u2013 months, years, sometimes decades \u2013 to a relationship and it doesn’t seem to be moving forward or to be working out, it\u2019s not unusual to begin to feel angry and resentful toward the other person.\u00a0 And it\u2019s tempting to begin to blame <\/span>him <\/i>for the choice you made to stay in the relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n

While it\u2019s possible that promises were made that had you continue to stay in the relationship \u2013 such as him promising that he would propose, and it never happened \u2013 the choice to stay inside of a dead-end relationship is completely yours.\u00a0 You get to decide just how long you are willing to wait.\u00a0 And you also are the one who decides how long you are willing to put your dreams, your happiness, and your life on hold, waiting for him to pop the question.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m not saying that it\u2019s \u201ceasy\u201d to walk away from a relationship, especially if you really love the person.\u00a0 It\u2019s going to take courage to stand for yourself and your dreams.\u00a0 But if you<\/i> won\u2019t stand for your dreams, who will?<\/strong><\/p>\n

One mistake women make is to begin to dish out ultimatums, such as:
\n\u201cIf you want to be with me, then you need to propose and give me a ring.\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you want us to be together, then we have to go to counseling.\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n

\u201cIf you want us to get back together, then _____.\u201d<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i>The problem with issuing ultimatums is that they suck the love, romance, and joy right out of the proposal.\u00a0 Think about it this way: Do you want him to propose because he feels he has to<\/i>, or because he can\u2019t imagine living his life without you in it?<\/p>\n

Issuing ultimatums backs the other person into a corner, and, even if you do get the proposal you want, you will never truly know for sure whether he is marrying you because he really wants <\/i>to.<\/p>\n

And, by the way, this holds true for situations other than proposals.\u00a0 If you\u2019re trying to get your husband to help you around the house, take you on a vacation, or start a family, and you\u2019re doing that by threatening to leave him, giving him the silent treatment, or withholding sex, you may get what you want, but I promise it won\u2019t be as fulfilling as if you knew that he was doing these things because he wants nothing more than to see you happy.<\/p>\n

So, what are the alternatives to issuing ultimatums?<\/p>\n