by Gladys Diaz
My question has to do with online dating. After writing to a man 2 or 3 times he wanted to get together, and I suggested the next week, not as soon as he offered. He said he would be gone on a trip to Greece for 1 month, and that we could get together after that. Four days after he is due to return my membership is over.
I would like to email him on the website and tell him this, so that we make the plan to meet very soon – or connect by phone. Does this constitute chasing him? Is it better to just wait for him to contact me – or even pay to keep my membership one more month?
Normally, I would tell you to wait to see whether he contacts you after he gets back from Greece. If he’s still interested in seeing you then, he will contact you. I’m wondering why there wouldn’t be any communication during his trip (unless Internet access is going to be an issue). If he does contact you during his trip, that would be a perfect opportunity to let him know that you just realized that your membership expires right after he returns, so he can contact you via email if he’d still like to get together. This way, you’re letting him know how to contact you, and the choice about whether or not to initiate another date lies with him.
In the meantime, you still have about a month of membership time left, so continue connecting with other men, accepting other dates and having fun while he’s away. There’s no guarantee that he will contact you when he returns so it’s up to you to continue sending the message to the world that you are available for the man who’s perfect for you to find and contact you! And remember to smile and flirt and get to know people in person, as well. The more open you are to meeting the right person for you, the more likely you are to attract him to you!
Regarding your question about whether or not to pay to keep your membership one more month, that’s completely up to you. While I wouldn’t recommend keeping it open as a way to ensure that this one guy will contact you, I would recommend it as a way to continue attracting potential beaus into your life. As I mentioned above, the more open and receptive you are to meeting and getting to know new men, accepting invitations to go out, and having fun while dating, the more likely you are to attract to yourself the man and the relationship of your dreams!
Comments? Questions? Let us know! We love hearing from you!
Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Dear Gladys,
Thank you for answering my question! I did email the man on the dating website telling him my membership would be over within several days after he would return and hoped he was enjoying his trip (Hope I did not sound anxious!). He emailed me when he returned on the website, giving me his telephone no. and his regular email address. I was happy that now there is a chance we can plan to get together as he had suggested before his trip. It’s fun to look forward to meeting, even though I don’t know if we will be a match.
Helen
You’re welcome, Helen. Now that there is an indication that he may still be interested in going out together when he returns, feel free to give him your phone number and email address as well. Why? This way, you know he has them and you don’t have to be in the awkward position of trying to figure out how many days to wait before contacting him once you know he’s back in town. Instead, the ball is back in his court, and he can ask you out again without you having to worry about pursuing him. And, again, you’ll know that he’s asking you out because he wants to, and not because you reminded him about it. Make sense?
In the meantime, continue corresponding with other men, accepting as many dates as possible, and having fun! This will make it a lot easier to not be doing a mental countdown while he’s away and, you never know what wonderful men you may meet during this time!