by Gladys Diaz
This week, I’ve been dealing with a really bad cold, but, as “luck” would have it, the cold provided me with more evidence of the 3 P’s to share with you, because my husband has gone above and beyond this week to do everything in his power to Provide for, Protect, and (wait for it…) Please me!
That’s right! The third “P” most important to a man is that he feels like he is able to Please you.
Now, this may be difficult for you to believe if you’re either not in a great relationship, or it’s been a while since you’ve felt like a man has gone out of his way to make you happy. But trust me, this one is right up there with the other two P’s as something that is essential to a man.
Why is pleasing you so important to him?
Well, no good man ever wakes up in the morning saying, “I wonder what I can do today to make her absolutely miserable!”
First of all, if you’re miserable, chances are you are making him miserable, too!
Secondly, it really does make a man feel fulfilled and complete to know that he is capable of making you feel happy.
You’ll often here me say:
A man doesn’t just want to see you smiling. He also wants to know that he had something to do with the smile on your face! (Tweet, Tweet that one!)
When a man has the consistent experience that nothing he does is good enough, or that “there’s just no pleasing you,” it makes him want to withdraw and stop trying. He doesn’t want to know that he’s doing anything that is causing you to feel disappointed or unhappy. It simply doesn’t feel “good” or “right” to him to know that he’s contributing to your unhappiness.
So, what are some ways that you can help a man contribute to your happiness?
Stop making what makes you happy a secret!
- Let him know what makes you happy. If there are things that you enjoy, like, or prefer, make let him know. If there is something you’d like to eat, an item you’d like to purchase, or a place you’d like to visit, tell him. Now, don’t tell him what to do or how to do it. Just let him know that it’s something that would make you happy. Let him figure out how to make it happen if he chooses to. Don’t make him try to guess or figure out what you want. Instead, set him up to win, because when he wins, you win!
- If something he does pleases you, inform your face! In other words: SMILE! Don’t keep your happiness a secret because you feel like you’ll owe him something or you feel like he’ll stop trying. In fact, the very opposite is true. The positive feeling of knowing that he did something to make you smile is like a drug to man. He’s going to want to repeat that feeling – for you and himself – again, so you’ve just increased the chances that he’ll look for other ways to please you.
- Show your appreciation. Don’t withhold your appreciation in an effort to seem like what he did is “no big deal.” You know how great it feels when you do something nice for someone and they let you know how much it meant to them. He’s no different. Letting him know that you are both happy and grateful for what he did will go a long way toward creating a wonderful cycle of giving, receiving, and appreciation in your relationship!
A good man will always do what he cans to please you.
If you feel like the man in your life has stopped doing the little things to make you happy, rather than looking outward at what he’s doing (or not doing; or not doing “well enough”) –
- Look within and see if you’ve stopped telling him what makes you happy out of fear that you won’t get it.
- See if you’ve been acting as if you don’t notice what he’s doing, or if you’ve been complaining that it’s not enough.
- Ask yourself if you’ve stopped demonstrating your appreciation for the little things, the big things, and everything in between.
If you’ve been doing any of the above, don’t beat yourself up about it. Instead, make today the day you begin to turn things around by starting to look for and notice the things he is doing – even if it’s something you think he should be doing.
Then smile and let him know that, not only are you happy, but that he had something to do with the smile on your face!
Comments? Questions? Let us know below! We love hearing from you!
Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net
