Are Your Limiting Beliefs Causing You Heartache?

Are Your Limiting Beliefs Causing You Heartache?

by Gladys Diaz 

How you relate to yourself is how you relate to the world. 

Do you feel like you are “too much” of something? Or maybe you feel the opposite and feel that you’re “not enough.” 

Do you feel like you’re too successful or too independent. Maybe you think you’re too skinny or too emotional or too old.

Or, like I said, maybe your limiting beliefs show up as “not enough” statements. Maybe you think you’re not confident enough or not athletic enough or not worthy enough to attract the relationship and the love that you want. 

When I was single, I had a belief that maybe I was going to be successful at everything in life EXCEPT love. I was so confused as to why I was having so much success in other areas of my life, receiving promotion after promotion at work, and still it seemed there wasn’t a man on the planet that wanted to commit to me

I made it mean that there was something wrong with me. I truly believed that I wasn’t enough. How did that show up for me? I over-compensated for it. I showed up as over-competent, uber-confident, and always looked like I was super put together. 

The truth was that then I would go home and cry at night because, even though I was overcompensating for my belief, it was still there, and no amount of covering it up could replace the heartache, discouragement and frustration. 

Until…  I started doing something about it. I dug in to discover where this belief came from. And what did I uncover? 

A memory from the 5th grade where a group of popular girls were talking in a circle and I overheard them talking about me. I remembered hearing them saying that I was too skinny and flat-chested. I also heard them say that they couldn’t believe I didn’t realize I was smelly. Even after I walked up to the circle, they still kept talking about me! As a 10-year old it really hurt my feelings! After that experience, I made up the belief that I wasn’t enough, that I was never going to be a part of the in-crowd, and that people didn’t like me.

And then, 25 years later, there I was still carrying that belief around like it owned me.  I was overcompensating for that belief and not getting the results that I wanted, all because I believed so deeply that something was wrong with me and that a man was never going to love me. 

Are you doing the same thing? 

Are you walking around with a limiting belief that is running you?

How do you compensate for your beliefs?

What would you give to change them so that you can start experiencing the love that you desire? 

If how you relate to yourself is how others relate to you, then, in order to change the way others relate to you, you must first begin with yourself. 

How to Change a Limiting Belief: 

  1. Distinguish What Your Limiting Belief Is. 

What are your limiting beliefs? What do you tell yourself about yourself when you feel fearful or uncertain? Get clear on what is the fundamental belief that the rest of them  stem from. 

  1. Dismantle the Limiting Belief. 

Where did this belief come from? When did you make it up?

Get responsible to the fact that YOU created the belief, and, if you created it, then you can change it. Uncover how the belief is playing out. How is it showing up? How are you compensating? How is it affecting your life, your work, your relationships? 

  1. Replace the Limiting Belief With a Truth that is Authentic to You.

Start training your brain with a new truth. However, if your limiting belief is “I’m not enough” then don’t just make your New Truth the opposite of “I’m enough.” Really get clear on the characteristics that make you enough and claim them.

When I finally started to turn my beliefs around, I began saying that I was beautiful, extraordinary, and amazing. Then I took on BEing those things! I began BEing those characteristics and began to believe that, as I was BEing those things, I had the power to call in someone who was just as beautiful and extraordinary and amazing as me.

I did. 

And, so can you. 

If you’d like to learn even more about how to really change your mindset, the one that is telling you that dating is hard and that love’s not going to happen for you, join us for our 2-day event, “Extraordinary Love NOW!”, which is happening THIS weekend – September 13th and 14th – in Miami, FL. We will be teaching 2 FULL DAYS of deep, HeartWork that WILL transform the way you feel about dating AND the RESULTS that you are experiencing.  And we’re doing it ABSOLUTELY FREE!

 Learn More Here

 

Dating doesn’t have to be hard. But your limiting beliefs may be making it hard for you. Let us help you learn the skills to make it fun and easy. 

 

Not local? Schedule time to speak with our team and get ready to have the love you want!

Book a Love Breakthrough Session here!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How to BE IRRESISTIBLE to Men

How to BE IRRESISTIBLE to Men

by Gladys Diaz 

 

Have you ever experienced this? You go on a date and, from your perspective, you have a GREAT time! The conversation flowed easily, you had fun together, there weren’t any awkward silences, and he even mentioned that he’d love to see you again soon!

And then…

You never hear from him again. 

What is that about, right?! 

So many women get frustrated with this aspect of dating because it can be so confusing.

When this type of thing happens to you over and over and over again, it’s easy to make up stories about men in general, or about yourself. 

You think: 

All men are flakes and dating is a waste of time. 

All men want is to sleep with me on the first date, and if I don’t, then I’ll never hear from him again. 

I’m too much for guys. They just don’t get me. 

There must be something wrong with me because I never get asked out on a second date. 

Sound familiar? 

Here are some DATING SKILLS that will help you to not just get asked out on a date with one man, but to be asked out on multiple dates with multiple men. 

First, there are two things that are extremely important to remember when dating that will save you a lot of unnecessary heartache. 

1.      Remember that you’re not the only person he’s going out with. He’s most likely talking to other women besides you, going on multiple dates a week, and trying to keep everything straight, just like you are. This is NORMAL. It’s how dating works. He’s getting to know different women (you being one of them) to see who he wants to continue getting to know better and possibly have a relationship with.

So how do you handle this? 

2.      You date more than one man at a time, too! When you’ve got multiple dates on your calendar and you’re having conversations with more than one man at a time, it saves you from being so hyper-aware of what each of them are doing and helps you not get attached to someone too soon. 

Want to stop picking up your phone anxiously every time it buzzes and feeling the constant disappointment that it’s not him? Date this way. This is the game-changer. We promise you he’s dating this way, so enjoy the dating experience more by doing this, too!

The next best way to make yourself irresistible to a man and ensure that you get asked on that 2nd date is to be CONFIDENT. 

When you exude confidence, you don’t pursue, you aren’t overly complimentary, and you don’t put pressure on a man to choose you. When you’re confident, you don’t give into the fears that he’s not thinking about you or rationalize doing things (like texting him first, sending a funny meme or a great article) to get on his radar. 

When you’re confident, you wait to hear from him, giving yourself the gift of being pursued. You are PRESENT in the conversation when you’re on the date, being in the moment and not in your head about what you should say and do. You show up as interested AND interesting because you know how to balance talking about yourself while also showing interest in him. 

When you’re confident, you smile, compliment him, and let him know that you’re having a good time. You don’t complain about him or about your life, you show positivity, lightness and fun. This is what makes you irresistible to a man. 

So, if you aren’t currently feeling confident about yourself in dating how do you get there? 

BELIEVE IT AND BE IT. 

BE confident. Be present on the date and remind yourself that you’re simply getting to know someone. Take the pressure off of yourself and him. Relax and have fun getting to know another human being. 

And smile. 🙂 Smiling transforms nervous energy to excited energy! So, if at any moment you aren’t sure what to say or you feel things are getting awkward, just smile and take a sip of your water, and wait for him to make the next move. 

Dating is meant to be fun! And who wouldn’t want to go out on a second date with a woman who is confident, light, and fun?

If you’d like to learn even more dating skills, or you know someone who would, join us for our 2-day event, “Extraordinary Love NOW!”, which is happening NEXT weekend – September 13th and 14th – in Miami, FL. We’ll be teaching 2 FULL DAYS of deep, HeartWork that WILL transform the way you feel about dating AND the RESULTS that you’re currently experiencing.  And, by the way, we’re doing it ABSOLUTELY FREE!

Learn More Here

Dating really can be fun! You just need to have the right skillset and know how to start BEING that Irresistible Woman that a man asks out again and again!

 

Not local and want a real shift in your experience of dating? Schedule time to speak with our team and get ready to have the love you want!

Book a Love Breakthrough Session here!

 

 

 

 

 

Truth: High-Quality Men Really DO Exist!

Truth: High-Quality Men Really DO Exist!

by Michelle Roza

“If there are all these great guys out there, WHERE THE HECK ARE THEY?” 

This is a question we hear all the time….

Case in point, we have a client who just got engaged, and when she first came to us she said the exact same thing“Where are all the high-quality men and how can I find them? Is it too much to ask to just find a GOOD man?”

You may think that good men don’t exist because you can’t seem to find someone who is actually interested in having a long-term relationship. Or maybe you’ve even considered moving to another city because good men don’t live in yours.

Well guess what?

Don’t pack your bags just yet, because it’s not about any of that.

It’s actually about who you are, who you’re attracting, and what you want to experience in a relationship.

If you’re feeling resigned, cynical, or frustrated about dating, it’s only because you’re not having a good experience and not getting the results you desire, NOT because what you want doesn’t exist.  

Think about it…

If you were meeting a lot of great, commitment-minded men who were going out of their way to make you smile… would you be feeling this cynical about dating?

NO! You’d be excited, enthusiastic, and looking forward to your next date!

So… how do you start attracting really great men? 

  1. Start paying attention to the INSIDE factors, because that’s what actually matters. 

What are the inside factors? 

Your beliefs. What do you believe about men? About love? About relationships?

Here’s the thing… Your brain is always looking for evidence that it is right. So, here’s the fact of the matter: If you believe that all men are liars, and you walk into a room full of men, you WILL either attract or be attracted to the ONE man in the room who’s dishonest, because your brain is always searching for that evidence.

So, if you want to start experiencing something different, then you’ve got to change your beliefs. 

How do I do this? 

Look for the patterns that are showing up in your dating and relationships. Close your eyes and take a close look at the last three or four dating experiences or relationships you’ve had and take an honest inventory of what showed up. I promise you, you’ll start to see patterns, and in those patterns is where your beliefs will reveal themselves.

I was in a 12-year marriage – it wasn’t a healthy relationship, and it ended in divorce. My ex-husband was constantly in and out of work, so I was working 3 jobs to help ends meet.  That left me feeling exhausted, frustrated, and resentful.

After that, I had a HUGE belief around men being unreliable and relationships with men being insecure and unstable.

So, guess what kept showing up in my dating life? Men who were insecure and unstable. They were either out of work or workaholics, alcoholics or addicted to some kind of drug, or men who were not available (in or just getting out of a relationship) and not interested in having a committed relationship.

I was attracting broken men because I felt that there was something inside of me that was broken, and I was looking for people that were experiencing the same thing.

When I started doing the HeartWork and began recognizing my own patterns and what I was creating because of them, things started to shift.

That’s why the next step is…

  1. Be COMMITTED to doing the HeartWork.

Stop waiting to feel “ready” or “motivated” to do your HeartWork.

If you knew that on the other side of the HeartWork was the man of your dreams, would you need to motivate yourself to do the HeartWork? 

I guarantee the answer is “No!”

We only have to motivate ourselves to the things that we are resisting. So… if you’re finding yourself thinking that you need to motivate yourself to date…what are you resisting?

Be honest with yourself.

You may believe it’s going to be hard, that it won’t work, that you don’t know how…. just to name a possible few! That’s because humans have trained ourselves and our brains for comfort, and we resist anything that perceive as hard, uncomfortable or confusing.

But take a good honest look at yourself and your current feelings about love and dating, because in the answer to the question of what you are resisting is a fear that you haven’t uncovered yet. And it’s this fear that is perpetuating the patterns you uncovered in the exercise above.

Once I got – I mean, REALLY got – that I was a high-quality woman, that I mattered, and felt comfortable being myself, I didn’t need to motivate myself to date, I was MOVED and inspired to date.

I was passionate about attracting the man of my dreams! I believed 100% that it was possible and ended up attracting multiple GOOD men that I got to CHOOSE from.

And that’s how it will happen for you, too.

Intention is Everything. The good, high-quality men out there are looking for a vibrational match. They are looking for a woman who is alluring and confident, and vivacious.

So, BE that!

And here’s an extra super-ninja tip: Start to NOTICE the good men out there and the good that men are doing in the world.

When you start paying attention and appreciating the good you see in men, you’ll start seeing it all around you. And when this starts to happen to you, you’ll know you are soooo close to attracting your partner.

Why not get there now?

Join us for our 2-day event, “Extraordinary Love NOW!”, which is happening this weekend – July 27th and 28th – in Miami Lakes, FL. We will be teaching 2 FULL DAYS of deep, heart work that WILL transform the way you feel about dating AND the RESULTS that you are experiencing.  And we’re doing it ABSOLUTELY FREE!

Learn More Here

Here’s another gift:

My daily prayer is, “If there’s something standing in my way, Lord, please let me see it so I can deal with it.”

We have the same prayer for you.

 

 

Why I Didn’t Marry My Cat (A Love Story)

Why I Didn’t Marry My Cat (A Love Story)

Guest post by Katie Miranda

The other day, I received a beautiful gift from one of my clients, Katie.  She is a talented artist and jewelry designer with a wonderful sense of humor, and, in her beautifully creative way, she drew an illustration to go along with her testimonial about how she went from being a 40-something, cat-loving, divorcee who had lost hope in finally finding her true love to a now blissfully happy bride-to-be!

I was so moved by the gift that I knew I had to share it!  So, here it is — Katie’s testimonial on why she didn’t end up marrying her cat!

 

“Why Gladys is the Reason I Didn’t Marry My Cat”

 

Your married friends, your parents, your grandparents are all telling you to stop being so picky and settle down and get married.

God knows your parents didn’t face the dating challenges you are: the swiping, the ghosting, the cute guy/girl who turns out to not look at all like his/her picture, the “u r hot. what r u doing?” messages…

They tell you to “stop being so picky,” but what does that mean? Does it mean “settling”?

No, not at all! It means expanding your horizons and letting go of limiting beliefs.

 Here’s an example of what that meant for me.

So, there I was in 2015, a 40-year old woman, and the ink was just drying on my divorce paperwork. “Doomed to a life of cat lady spinsterhood” was the expression I saw on other people’s faces when I told them my age and marital status.

But I wasn’t giving up.

After all, now that I was divorced, I finally knew what wanted and DIDN’T want, right?

I hired Gladys to help me, because she had what I wanted: a happy, stable, long term marriage. I knew I could learn from her.

Gladys told me to make a list of primary qualities I wanted in my future husband: My list included:

1) hot

2) Muslim

3) financially stable

4) leads a healthy lifestyle

5) no children living with him

Tall order, you say, for a 40-year old divorcé?

The thing is, these were non-negotiable for me.

1) I had to be attracted to him.

2) Since I am Muslim I wanted to meet someone who would fast Ramadan with me, go on the hajj pilgrimage with me and do our prayers together. It was a matter of sharing the same values and being on the same page and I couldn’t get that with a non-Muslim.

3) My ex-husband was dependent on me financially and this caused a lot of problems in the marriage. I knew I didn’t want to go through that again.

4) What this meant to me is that I couldn’t live with a couch potato or someone who smoke or drank. I’m active and healthy and I wanted someone who shared these values.

5) I did not want to live with someone else’s kids or to be put in a step-mother role Not that there is anything wrong with that. It just wasn’t for me.

These things, weren’t “checklist items” for me.  They reflected the values and character traits that I wanted to attract in the man of my dreams – a man who was spiritual, trustworthy, responsible, and ambitious.  I wanted to share my life with a man I could trust and who inspired me.

Oh! I also had a list of secondary qualities, one of which, in my head, was a primary quality:

6) He has to have been born or at least raised in the US.

You see, my ex-husband was not born and raised in the US and I believed that one of the primary reasons for our divorce was a clash of cultures. (In reality, that wasn’t it, it was that he didn’t fit with some of my primary values.) I was dead set on never considering anyone who hadn’t been in the US for at least their teenage years. And no Saudis. Definitely no Saudis. I have a girlfriend who was married to a Saudi and the horror stories she told… Wow! Can’t have any guy telling me I have to cover my hair or that I can’t drive a car, right?

By the time 2016 rolled around, I had met and chatted with quite a few men over various Muslim and non-Muslim apps and sites. No one was a good fit; I was wracking up quite a collection of my own horror stories.

And then on Twitter, of all places, a cute guy DM’d me after I posted a photo from a café in Portland I had been to that day. He said he had also been there that day, but we had not seen each other. We chatted a little and then he asked me out for coffee. I looked at his profile and it said he lived in Al Qatif and Portland. I didn’t know where Al Qatif was, but I took a guess it was in Saudi Arabia and, sure enough, it was.

Oh no, not a Saudi! Too bad, cuz he was cute!

And it seemed we had a lot of shared interests, judging by his Twitter timeline. That’s the thing with Twitter, you can actually get a pretty good idea of what the person is actually into. He was into hiking, and nature, Bernie Sanders, cats, and women’s rights, just like me!

 Hmm, not exactly my stereotype of a Saudi… I wonder….

I cautiously agreed to go out to coffee and told Gladys I was concerned that he wasn’t born in the US and what would we truly have in common. I wanted to be able to sing the 80’s pop songs I grew up with in the car with my future husband. I thought this was a non-negotiable quality. In reality, it was an ego-based quality, not a values-based quality.

The funny thing is, one day we were in the car and he was singing something over and over.. “It’s a croo, croo, croo summer, leading me hero…” Eventually, I figured out that this was his interpretation of Bananarama’s “Cruel Summer,” a song he heard constantly growing up because there was an American radio station in Saudi Arabia.

“It’s a cruel, cruel summer Leaving me here on my own” 

We had a good laugh about that.

 He does know all the 80’s songs I grew up with! Hmmmm… I wonder…

Fast forward a year and a half, and we are planning our wedding! He is everything on my primary list and more. Oh, and he really loves my cat too!

If I had nixed him because he didn’t grow up in the US or because of my prejudices about Saudis, (I’d only ever met one Saudi before him, by the way!), I would have nixed the love of my life. 

When I hear women saying, “Well, he has to be a Pakistani, like me” or “He must be my exact religious sect”, or “He has to make a certain amount of money per year”, or “He has to be at least 6 feet tall,” I wonder what kind of amazing guys they might be missing out on. What if the man of your dreams makes $5000/year less than your requirement, or he is 5’11”?

Are you willing to miss out on the love of your life based on some numbers?

These are ego-based desires, not values-based desires. Just like my desire to meet and marry a man who was raised in the US.

Gladys helped me figure out what my desires were that were values-based so that I didn’t get caught up in ego-based desires and decline that date with my future husband.

The month before I met my fiancé, I asked Gladys what the one quality her clients who met the man of their dreams all shared. She said it was the belief that they would meet him.

That really stuck with me and I committed to believing I would meet my future man, and I did!

Good luck to all the single ladies out there. I know how hard it can be.

If you truly believe you will find your match and you’e willing to let go of limiting beliefs about what that person has to be, you will.

And, if you need help, like I did, talk to Gladys!

 

If you’re tired of letting your fears and doubts stop you from experiencing the love that you truly desire, we invite you to schedule time to speak with Michelle or me so that we can help you break through your fears and break through to love!

 

Discover the Secret to Lasting Love!

Discover the Secret to Lasting Love!

by Gladys Diaz

This past Monday we celebrated one of my FAVORITE love stories of all time!

Seven years ago, I stood, with tears of joy streaming down my face, as my twin sister, Michelle, and Arnie promise to love one another for a lifetime.

As I watched her walking down the aisle with her two sons, I just couldn’t stop the tears, remembering the painful

road full of heartache and disappointment that Michelle had walked down before finally attracting Arnie into her life.

Michelle had felt the pain of being in a marriage that had been falling apart for many years, followed by a string of non-relationships to men who were unavailable, non-commital, and who did not treat her with the love and tenderness she so longed for and deserved.

She came very close to giving up on love.

Thankfully, with the guidance of a coach, Michelle was able to see that there were Love Barriers — fears, doubts, and limiting beliefs that were stopping her from attracting the loving relationship she truly desired, and she was willing to do her HeartWork to remove and replace them.  And, once she did, she began attracting amazing men, including the one who was looking into her eyes, promising to spend the rest of his life loving, adoring, and helping to make her dreams come true!

In doing her HeartWork, Michelle discovered what had been missing in her life that had led her to stay in an unhappy marriage for so long; attract, date, and hold onto dead-end relationships with men who were unwilling or unable to love her the way she longed to be loved; and what had her wondering whether there was something wrong with her and if she would ever experience happiness of being in a truly loving relationship.

She explains her journey this way in our ebook, 30 Days and 30 Ways to Fall In Love with YOU!:

I decided to take a deeper look into my relationship patterns so that I could begin to uncover what was at the source of the results I was producing.

I discovered that in the 5 years I had been dating, there was something fundamental missing in all of my dating and relationship experiences…ME! I had been trying to be the “perfect woman” to hide who I really was, because I was terrified that if a man discovered who I really was, he could never fall in love with me. I had convinced myself that the real me was unlovable.

I began to write down all the things about myself that I felt were unlovable…it was a long list! Then one by one, I began to forgive myself. I realized there was nothing I could do to change the past. All I could do now was learn the lessons and forget the details.

I gave myself permission to let it all go for good. As I let each one go, something beautiful began to happen – I began to fall in love with me! I discovered that the only love that was missing was my own. I was now free to love and to be loved!

See, what Michelle discovered is that what stops you from creating a happy and loving relationship you want is not online dating; it’s not what happened in your past; and it’s not your current partner, your ex, or the guy who didn’t love you back.

The #1 difference between the woman who is not experiencing love and happiness in her relationships and the one who IS comes down to one thing:

The relationship you have with yourself.

Think about it…

If you do not love, accept, honor, and prioritize yourself, it is impossible for you to attract someone into your life who will love, accept, honor, and make you a priority in his life!

In fact, it’s unfair to expect a man to love you and give to you the soul-level kind of love that you are not giving yourself.

And what happens when you don’t have a deep level of self-love is that you continue repeating the same dysfunctional patterns and having the same painful experiences over and over again.  

This is why we created The Self-Love Secret Mission.

We know it’s not easy to break free from long-lasting limiting beliefs and patterns on your own.

So we created a fun, transformative, and interactive program where we will take you on a 21-day journey to falling in love with YOU!

The best thing about The Self-Love Secret Mission is that, not only is it FREE – our Valentine’s Day Gift to you – but you also get to spend Valentine’s Day and several weeks afterwards with us! You’ll be having fun AND you’re going to experience what it’s like to feel truly loved by the person with whom you’ll have the longest lasting loving relationship of your life: YOU!

So, what are you waiting for?

Join The Self-Love Secret Mission now, and take the first step toward creating the love affair of a lifetime!

 

 

Happy New Love in the New Year!

Happy New Love in the New Year!

by Gladys Diaz

As we ring in this new year, Michelle and I want to wish you all the love, happiness, health and wealth your heart desires! We are so grateful to have you in our community and look forward to a year of love, magic, and miracles!

This is why we are excited about you joining us for the New Love in the New Year 7-Day Challenge!

In just a few short days, you will take the steps to release the old, call NEW LOVE into your life, and begin living in the relationship of your dreams in 2018!

Simply click here to join us for The New Love in the New Year 7-Day Challenge!

These are the same steps that Denise followed, and she is now planning her wedding!

They are the same steps Candy followed, and she got to spend New Year’s Wve in the arms of her new love!

And Cathy was able to turn her entire marriage around and is now enjoying more love, romance, and intimacy with her husband after almost losing the marriage!

Now it’s YOUR TURN to make 2018 your Year of Love and Intimacy!

Join us on this amazing journey to discover how to make 2018 the year you experience life and love beyond your wildest dreams!

Even better, let’s do this together!

Click here to join the New Love in the New Year 7-Day Challenge!

 

Imagine for just a few minutes what it will be when it’s December 31,2018, just minutes before midnight and your standing next to the man of your dreams.  As you look into his eyes, anticipating the BEST New Year’s kiss of  your life, you look back over this year and know that you are living in the loving, passionate, intimate relationship you have been praying for and dreaming of because you took one simple step and joined us for this challenge!

Michelle and I are are committed to making 2018 an extraordinary year, and that includes helping you to get the love your heart desires!  Join us now and completely transform your love life in the new year!

CLICK HERE to join us for the New Love in the New Year 7-Day Challenge today!

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