by Gladys Diaz

Be happy with being you. Love your flaws. Own your quirks. And know that you are just as perfect as anyone else, exactly as you are.

~ Ariana Grande

I  remember there was a time in my life where I wasn’t really happy being me.  During my teenage years, my mom was married to a man who was physically abusive.  There was a lot of violence and alcoholism in our home, and I was terrified of anyone – family or friends – finding out what we were going through.

So, for many years I pretended that everything was fine.  I always had a smile on my face, was perky and positive.  No one would have ever guessed that several nights a week the police had to be called, that there were times when we had to ask neighbors for food so that my sisters and I would have something to eat, or that I often wished I could disappear and become someone else – anyone else but who I was.

Those years took a toll on my self-esteem.  Even after my sisters and I were removed from that living situation, I was still afraid that people would know why we lived with our uncle and aunt and why our little sister had to live with her dad.  So, I kept pretending.  I never let anyone see me cry.  I pretended to be strong and have it all together.  I fell for the wrong type of guy and believed him when he said that no one else would ever love me.  I sincerely believed that if someone knew how “messed up” I was, what all my flaws were, that they would reject and leave me.

It wasn’t until I began to accept myself, to forgive – yes, my mom, stepfather, and ex-boyfriend, but also myself, for all of the mistakes and poor choices I’d made – that I began to see that there was nothing “wrong” with me.  I am just as wonderful anyone else!  I don’t have to do or be anyone or anything other than who I am. Who I am is more than enough! And who I am is already lovable!

I am just as wonderful anyone else!  I don’t have to do or be anyone or anything other than who I am. Who I am is more than enough! And who I am is already lovable!

I don’t know if you can relate to the feeling of wondering whether or not who you are – with all of your assets, flaws, and quirks – is enough.  Enough to be loved. Enough to be accepted.  Wondering whether if the man who you’re dating or in love with were to discover “that thing” – whatever “that thing” is for you that you keep hidden, covered, and protected – would still choose to love you.

If that’s a thought floating around in your head, I want you really take in what you are about to read.

 You are already whole, perfect, compete, and absolutely lovable, just the way you are!

You don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not.

You don’t have to hide the things about you that you don’t want others to see or know.

The ability to unconditionally love and accept another and to receive unconditional love and acceptance truly begins with being willing to unconditionally love and accept yourself, first!

And I want you to know that the man who chooses to love you is going to love you – all of you.  He’s going to love the silly quirks, like the fact that you cry during commercials; wish on a star, just in case it’s true that that works, and never leave an egg by itself in the carton so it won’t be lonely! (Yes, those are my quirks and Ric loves them!)  He’s going to love the parts of you that you feel are not pretty or “perfect” enough.  And his love will help you heal those parts of your heart that have been broken, dented, and bruised.

Yes, you can choose to change and grow and improve – but not in order to “fix” yourself or be deserving of love – just because you want to become an even more amazing version of you!

P.S. If this is something you struggle with really believing, we invite you to read the e-book we created with 30 other Heart Messengers titled 30 Days and 30 Ways to Fall In Love With YOU!: A Daily Journey to Discovering Self-Love!

Comments?  Questions?  Let us know below!  We love hearing from you!