by Gladys Diaz
I know that today is a day that most people associate with being in a relationship. I’m not going to lie. I smiled from ear to ear when my husband said, “Happy Valentine’s Day” first right as the clock struck midnight last night! I love loving and being loved by him!
I also know this isn’t the easiest day in the world for women who aren’t in their dream relationship yet or who are going through a rough patch with the man they love. We’ve commercialized a holiday (like we tend to do with all the others), and have lost sight of what today really signifies – A day to celebrate LOVE!
Love comes in as many shapes, sizes, and flavors as the chocolates contained in the heart-shaped boxes that millions of people are giving and receiving today! There is family love; the love shared between friends; the love we extend to humanity, simply because we are all one; and, yes, romantic love. But there’s another type of love that we sometimes forget to recognize, which may be the most important love of all: Self-Love!
Whitney Houston said it best when she said, “Learning to love yourself, it is the greatest love of all!”
Being able to see ourselves just as we are and just as we are not – with all of our quirks, imperfections, and scars (the ones you see and the deeper ones you can’t) – and bring love, acceptance, and forgiveness to even those parts of us we wish weren’t there, is the access to discovering and experiencing true love. Not a single one of us is perfect. And many of us believe that there are things about ourselves that are unlovable. We worry that if the person we love were to discover “that thing” that we keep hidden and locked away about ourselves, he will almost certainly leave and stop loving us. But the truth is, that it isn’t really the other person who wouldn’t love and accept that part of us. We’re the ones who push others away, too afraid to open up and let love in.
I don’t have to know you personally to know that some of this is probably resonating with you. And, if it is, I invite you to make this Valentine’s Day all about YOU! Make it about loving, accepting, and forgiving yourself. Look within yourself, and make today the day that you experience the beauty and wonder of loving yourself completely!
So, how can you do that? It’s simple. Not always “easy,” but simple.
1. Forgive yourself. All of us have done at least one thing in our lives that we wish we hadn’t. Rather than continuing to rehash and punish yourself for those things, grant yourself forgiveness. You’ve probably already experienced whatever consequence there was to experience. So just think of the situation, let go of the regrets and resentment, and say the words, “I forgive myself for…” Say it aloud, so that you can hear yourself and allow the forgiveness to penetrate your heart.
2. Give yourself permission to be happy. Some of us are so addicted to drama, worry, and suffering that we’ll create situations to stress, argue, and suffer over. Know that you are worthy of happiness. You were created to live in peace and joy. Give yourself permission to laugh and live and love! If you did Step 1 and forgave yourself, you’ll probably find this step a lot easier!
3. Treat yourself. Are there hobbies and activities you enjoy doing, but never make the time? Are there ways you’d like to pamper yourself? Are there treats and gifts you’d love to get and wish someone else would give them to you? Why not make today a day that you treat yourself to life’s pleasures? Get that massage; have the chocolates (the whole box, if you want to!); take a nice, long bath; take yourself out on a date! Do whatever it is that brings you joy, peace, and pleasure. And enjoy every minute of it. You really do deserve it!
For more ideas on how to remove the barriers that are blocking love from your life and experience the magic and wonder of falling in love with YOU, read the book 30 Days and 30 Ways to Fall In Love with You, and begin a 30-day journey that will completely transform the way you experience yourself and your life!
The more you bring love and acceptance to yourself, the easier it becomes to allow love to enter your heart. The more you give yourself permission to experience joy and gratitude, the greater the chances that you will attract more of that into your life. And the better you treat yourself, the more you send the message to yourself and the world: “I am love-able – Able to both love and be loved!”
We wish you a day overflowing with all of the love, happiness, and peace your heart desires!
Remember: You are LOVE-ABLE!
Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net
“Give yourself permission to be happy.” Simple, great advice.
Yes’s it is, Kimba! Thank you!
What a perfect Valentine’s gift….a message of Self-Love. It is amazing that we are in a time when this concept is even in our awareness. 20 years ago, we would not have been talking about Self-Love so openly. This is a great time to be alive. Thank you for this timely post.
So true! You’re welcome, Suzanne!
Self-love is a wonderful path to becoming lovable. You gave some great suggestions to getting the ball rolling!
Thank you, Line! I’m glad you liked the suggestions!
What a wonderful message! After my divorce I took great pains to build a nice high emotional wall around me – every time some poor guy attempted to approach I put on my most menacing snarl to keep him away. “Never again!” was my battle cry. Thank heavens that’s behind me now, but a big part of my being able to move forward was to re-learn to love myself.
So glad you discovered the power of self-love, Marquita. That is he access to giving and receiving love! 🙂
Yes I am loveable.
We are on the same page- Day 3 is forgiveness and yes today I do need to love myself more – I know why I am doing this Love challenge. We must connect – maybe on skype love Suziexo
Beautiful, Suzie! We are often on the same page! 🙂 Yes, let’s connect!
What a LOVEly post Gladys, and a great day to post! I think Self Love can gets pushed to the side when life is busy with work and looking after others – but you are so right, it must be brought out and experienced. We must serve others better when we are at our best 🙂
Jacs
Yes, we shouldn’t forget about the roots and the ultimate goal of St. Valentine’s Day – to celebrate love. Even if it’s love for ourselves.
Falling in love with ourselves is a precious advice that is not that easy to follow as it might seem. Thanks for your spiritual guidance – I’m sure that your tips will work for me.