by heartsdesireintl | Nov 6, 2012 | Dating, HDI Blog, Intimacy, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance
by Gladys Diaz
I can’t believe the 30-Day Blogging Challenge is complete! To be honest, when I began, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to come up with stuff to write about for 30 days straight, but, as is always the case, when we step outside of our comfort zones, stretch beyond where we think we can, and are willing to grow just a little more, we discover just how capable we truly are!
So, what are some of the lessons I’ve learned in this process, and how does it relate to relationships?
- There is a desire, a thirst for information and inspiration regarding relationships: I learned that there is a desire and a hunger to learn how to make relationships better. All of us want to experience love, peace, and passion in our lives and our relationships, but we’re not always sure of how to go about getting it. Many times, we do not see how our fears, doubts, and limiting beliefs are actually blocking us from having the things we most desire. We’re not aware of how we self-sabotage our own happiness. I am grateful for the work that we do and for the women (and men) who are ready to learn and grow and transform their lives so that they can have the relationships their hearts desire!
- I am an instrument of love, peace, healing, and transformation. I love to connect with, inspire, and make a real difference in the lives of others. I’ve always loved writing and speaking, and I can see how I can use them to reach hundreds… thousands of people to make a real impact in this world. The resounding message in our blog is that we need to be the love we want to see in our lives, relationships, and the world. By reaching out, connecting, and sharing tips, ideas, information, and inspiring messages, I can be part of bringing about the peace and love I want to experience in this world, in every moment of my life!
- We are all part of something bigger than ourselves. I joined the Social Media Club of South Florida Facebook group the day they began talking about the challenge. I wasn’t sure if I fit in a group with others who I saw as more knowledgeable, experienced, and well-versed in social media than I am. I found myself pleasantly surprised, and loved each time I saw someone in the group retweet or comment on the blog. And I loved returning the favor, too! I get the same experience with the other members of the Heartcore Woman’s Inner Circle, where we provide one another with tons of TLC (Tweeting, Liking, and Commenting) on one another’s blogs. During this process, there was a core group of ladies who commented on almost every single post, and I am so grateful for being able to connect with them on a more personal level, beyond learning about how to move our businesses forward! And this is what being “in relationship” is all about: The loving, selfless giving and receiving of love and encouragement!
- I love connecting with you! Perhaps the most rewarding part of all of this blogging was hearing how a post helped you discover something about yourself, your partner, or relationships in general. Hearing your a-ha moments, affirmations, the ways you practice self-care, and the importance of intimacy in our lives was fun and inspiring for me! So, thank you so much for taking the time to comment and share with all of us!
There are so many more lessons I walk away with. I am inspired to continue blogging – probably not every day, but at least 2-3 times per week. I hope that the 30 daily “Heart’s Desire Thought for the Day” helped provide you with the information and inspiration you seek regarding love, dating, relationships, intimacy, forgiveness, parenting, and more! They are there, on our blog, archived and ready to be accessed and shared whenever your heart desires!
Thank you for letting me share my blogging-challenge journey. Thank you for being part of it. Thank you for being YOU!
So, now it’s your turn… What topics, questions, or ideas would you like to see covered in our blog? In other words, how may we continue to serve you?
Photo credit: jurvetson via photopin.comhttp://www.photopin.com/ cc
by heartsdesireintl | Oct 29, 2012 | Dating, Gratitude, HDI Blog, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance
by Gladys Diaz
Last week, a “cyber-friend” of mine lost her husband. Although it was a virtual friendship that started when she heard me speak at a business woman’s networking event, we did create a connection by commenting on one another’s Facebook posts. Soon after we became FB friends, I learned that her husband had been battling cancer for over 3 years. Immediately, our connection grew stronger, with me having experienced my late husband’s battle with cancer over 14 years ago.
Whenever she would write about some good news they received, I felt like I was celebrating right along with her. When they encountered a roadblock or received bad news, I was saddened along with her and tried to send words of hope and encouragement. A few weeks ago, they were given the news no one wants to hear, that there was nothing else modern medicine could do to treat her husband’s cancer. I was frightened for her. I remember hearing those words and being so unwilling to accept them. I remember praying harder than ever and begging God to keep my late husband alive. Although I continued to pray for a miracle, I was afraid for her.
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by heartsdesireintl | Oct 19, 2012 | Dating, Gratitude, HDI Blog, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance, Uncategorized
by Gladys Diaz
Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person they are almost indistinguishable.
~ David Augsburger
When people think about “good communication,” they usually think about how effectively they can say or deliver their message. As we saw in a blog posted earlier this week, when we discussed the power of your words, it is important to say what you want to say with love and respect. Listening, however, can be an even more important aspect of communication. The way we listen can actually communicate love more loudly than anything we can say.
If we listen with the intention of figuring out what we are going to say in response to what the other person is saying, we are not being present in the conversation. If we are listening through a preconceived “filter” of how we already see and hear the person who is speaking – filled with judgment, lack of belief, etc. – then we may miss what the person is trying to tell us. And, if we allow ourselves to get “triggered” during the conversation, we can totally miss the “heart message” behind the words being spoken.
Contrarily, if we choose to listen – to truly hear the person, the message, and the possibilities behind what is being shared – even if it’s uncomfortable to hear… even if there’s something we’d like to say about it… even if we’re not sure where the conversation will lead… If we can commit to just listening, we give the person speaking the gift of feeling like he/she is being heard, “gotten,” and loved. And, in this act of listening, we give ourselves a gift, too, because, as we listen, we may discover something new about the person and ourselves, we may finally hear the message we’ve been waiting and hoping to hear, and may just experience the love, intimacy, and connection our hearts desire.
To whom will you give the gift of listening today?
Photo credit: Collin Key via photopin.com cc
by heartsdesireintl | Oct 15, 2012 | Dating, Gratitude, HDI Blog, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance
by Gladys Diaz
This past weekend, Michelle and I celebrated our 42nd Birthday (for those of you who didn’t know, we are twins!). When it comes to birthdays, I love to make a big deal. When my husband or one of my boys has a birthday, I make that whole week Birthday Week,” and that person gets to feel special all week through small surprises, getting away with a little more than usual, and being served Birthday Pancakes on the big day (one for each year). It’s my way of making the guys I love feel special. And I get that it’s my way – the way I like to express my love through small gifts and acts of kindness.
My husband is not really into details like that. He always shows me that he loves me, but expresses his love through physical touch and spending time together. In the past, I have to admit that I would build up this “birthday surprise” in my head and then go about planning things to make it happen, because I didn’t want to be disappointed if he hadn’t planned something special for me. On a few occasions, I was upset that he was asking me on the day of my birthday what it was I wanted to do. And, back in my pouty, bratty, controlling days, we ended up not doing much of anything, because I was more concerned with being right than being happy… even on my birthday!
Well, this Birthday Week I was too sick to really plan anything… And the most amazing thing happened! First, my husband planned a night of dinner and dancing with my sister and her husband. That plan fell through, due to my illness, but it was soooo awesome that he came up with what would have been my perfect idea for a birthday celebration with my best friends! When he saw how sad I was about not being able to go out with them, he said, “We can still do something fun, just the two of us.” He asked me what I wanted to do, and we ended up going to a dine-in theater where we had a spectacular dinner while watching a movie in reclining sofa-style seats, with an ottoman on which to prop up our feet! I loved it!
Before I left to go pick up my mom so that she could watch the boys, I noticed my little one was dressed, and not in his pajamas. When I asked him, he said, “Well, I thought we were going with Dada to the ssss—.” Busted! Poor thing, he was trying to keep the secret that my husband had planned to take them out to the store to get me a present while I picked up my mom! Another surprise! The boys ended up picking out some beautiful bangle bracelets in my favorite color (purple), and my husband picked out the sweetest birthday card, in which he wrote me a message, thanking me for being the best mom, wife, and best friend. They also bought me some yummy cookies-and-cream chocolate mousse cupcakes (can’t wait to have my left-over one tonight!).
On my actual birthday, I went thrift store shopping (one of my favorite things to do), and I scored a beautiful new BCBG dress that will be my favorite for a long time, as well as some other great finds (mostly purple!). Not once did my husband call to tell me we were going to be late for the movies (his pet peeve) if I didn’t hurry up. He just sent me one text about ½ an hour before we had to leave to ask me my status. So, I got to shop in peace (another surprise!). We took the boys to see a really funny movie, then went to order some crabs to be steamed (my birthday, my choice!) and he bought me some cute purple-and-black sneakers that we just happened to walk by at the store (yet another surprise). We had our yummy crab dinner and then snuggled on the couch until late, watching some of our favorite shows.
As I lay down last night, I thanked God for all of the sweet surprises I had received on this Birthday Weekend. And it wasn’t really about the gifts. It was the fact that my hubby had gone out of his way to make sure that I felt special on my Birthday. He did all of the little things that make me smile, jump up and down with delight, and make me feel loved. I didn’t ask him to. I didn’t expect it. Instead, I gave myself the gift of allowing myself to be pleasantly surprised. And it was so much sweeter that way!
I must have thanked my husband at least a hundred times this weekend… But, you know what… When I finish typing this blog post, I’m going to send him a thank-you text, just because I’m still smiling!
Do you and your husband or boyfriend have different ways of expressing your love? Do you resent or try to get him to change his ways to match, or do you allow yourself to be pleasantly surprised?
by heartsdesireintl | Oct 14, 2012 | Dating, Gratitude, HDI Blog, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance
by Gladys Diaz
All intimacy is rare — that’s what makes it precious. And it involves the revelation of one’s self and the loving gaze upon another’s true self (no makeup, no fancy car, no defensive charm, no seduction) — that’s what makes it so damn hard. Intimacy requires honesty and kindness in almost equal measure (a little more kindness, I think), trust and trustworthiness, forgiveness and the capacity to be forgiven . . . It’s more than worth.
~ Amy Bloom
One of the reasons intimacy in a relationship is so precious is because it involves pure and unadulterated vulnerability to create it. Intimacy is more than just the physical, sexual part of a relationship. It’s that moment of connection – where you allow someone to see straight through to the core of who you are. It takes courage to be that transparent, that open to someone else. But, then again, love requires being willing to take an emotional risk. And the payoff – the connection, the feeling of “oneness” that is created in those moments where you know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that the other person sees the very essence of you and accepts, cherishes, and honors it… it’s makes every bit of the risk worthwhile!
When are the moments where you feel most intimately connected?
Photo credit rishwan jalyl via photopin.com cc
