by Gladys Diaz
Is your past keeping you from having the future you desire?
Are you unable to get over an ex, no matter what you do?
Are you so afraid of getting your heart broken like you did last time, that you’re stopping yourself from being available?
Are you scared that you’ll choose the wrong man yet AGAIN and end up brokenhearted and?
Do you see how these are all fears that are being triggered by something you experienced in the past?
If you don’t overcome your past, your past will be present in your present and impact your future. Which is a shame, because your past is not a predictor, it’s an informer.
What does that mean?
It means that, just because you chose an abusive man in the past, doesn’t mean you will do it again.
It means that just because your last boyfriend cheated on you and the relationship ended in massive heartache for you, doesn’t mean the next man will do this, too.
Your past experiences don’t determine what you will continue to experience IF you do the HeartWork to replace the fears that created them.
We all have fears. We are all humans walking around afraid of what someone else might do to us, worrying we may mess up, or that something might go wrong. Fear is part of the human condition. We can’t eliminate it, but we can learn to overpower it.
The trick is learning how to break through any patterns of fear and anxiety that are stopping you from living the life and creating the future you desire.
The crazy thing about fear is that the energy of fear is magnetic. When you are living in a space of fear around anything, you are energetically and subconsciously attracting that to you. This means that until you do the work to release the fear, you WILL continue to experience it.
So how do you release fear?
You can learn to release fear by going through our “In-the-Moment Fear Exercise. Trust us, making this exercise a practice you do all the time will change your life.
Moment of Fear Exercise
1. Recognize what got triggered inside of you.
Realize this: When you experience a fear, it isn’t you that got t triggered, something inside of you got triggered — a past experience, a fear, an anxiety that’s been developed over time. When that thing gets triggered, you can do 1 of 2 things.
You can…
a) Go into your automatic response of either blowing up or shutting down (it’s called fight or flight. We’re sure you’ve heard of it.)
OR
b) STOP and recognize that something has been triggered and then move on to step 2 in the exercise.
Note: This acknowledgement happens in a split-second, so it does take some practice to gain the awareness to recognize the trigger in the moment.
2. Ask yourself: What just happened?
It’s important that you answer this question with only the facts about what actually happened, with no interpretation or analysis of the event(s) that just took place. It usually can be answered with as few as 3-10 words. Anything longer is a clue that you making what happened mean something.
3. Ask yourself: What did I make it mean?
What did you decide it meant when that guy you just went out with didn’t call the next day?
What did you make it mean when you saw your date going to the bathroom with his phone?
Did you create the idea that because he didn’t call you it means you’re not dateable?
Did you decide that because your date took his phone into the bathroom it meant he was texting another girl?
The majority of the time, whatever is upsetting you, robbing you of your peace, and/or causing you fear is not what actually happened. What’s upsetting you is whatever you made what mean — about him, you, them, it… everything!
4. Ask yourself: Is that what really happened?
Because our brain cannot tell the difference between what is actually happening and what we’re afraid might or might not be happening, this is the life-altering part of this exercise.
When you take what you made an experience mean and compare it to what actually happened, you start to see reality and the fear disappears.
Michelle was talking to a client the other day, and walking her through this exercise. A man had asked her what was wrong with her that she is in her 40’s and has never been in a long-term relationship. She made that experience mean that she is a failure in everything in her life, and that it’s never going to work for her.
As Michelle walked her through this exercise, she did what we all do: find ways to justify what we’ve made it mean. “But I haven’t been in a relationship, so I am a failure!” “My business isn’t working right now, and it never will!.
Michelle asked her, “Is ‘never’ happening right now?” “Does because it hasn’t’ worked mean it never will?”
Of course, the answer to these questions is “no,” and once she saw that, she started laughing and her desire to continue the journey in her business and dating was renewed.
What about you?
What do you want to experience in your life? What if you took this exercise and put it into action, practicing it over and over until you shifted what you are currently experiencing?
Overcoming your fears gives you POWER. It gives you absolute power to create anything you desire, in love and beyond.
Because we desire this for you, PLUS so much more, we have put together an incredible Pre-Black Friday offer that you can grab now! This Love Power Pack includes tickets to our 2020 Love Vision Live Event happening in December, as well as some swag to help you always remember that you are a fierce, feminine, and fabulous and that you have the power to create your love vision NOW.
Have this be the last Christmas and New Years you spend alone? Come to this event and you may not even be alone this Christmas! How would that feel?
Don’t let your fears and your past stop you from creating the future you want, including the loving, passionate, extraordinary relationship your heart desires!
