How to Communicate so He Can Actually Hear You

How to Communicate so He Can Actually Hear You

by Gladys Diaz 

What do your conversations with your partner look and feel like? 

When you share what you want or feel with your partner, do you think you’re communicating effectively, but he n gets defensive or doesn’t understand what you’re really trying to say? 

Do you want to know how to communicate what you want and feel in a way that your partner can receive and hear it? 

Sometimes, learning how to communicate effectively in relationships can feel like you’re learning a whole new language. This is because we’ve been conditioned that “being honest” or “sharing how we feel” means we have to complain or say what we want in an ineffective way. 

For example, let’s say you feel like your partner doesn’t do enough around the house. You say things like, “It’d be nice if I could get some help around here!” or “I never get any help!” or “I always have to do everything myself.” 

And then… he doesn’t do anything different. 

You’re confused, because you think you expressed your needs and hoping your partner will feel motivated and inspired to help. 

But he isn’t.

This was going on in my relationship with Ric years ago, and it was frustrating! 

I felt like I was asking for help, but nothing was changing in his behavior. 

Why wasn’t he responding the way I wanted him to?!

The answer is because I wasn’t communicating effectively.  

One day I said distinctly, “I need help.” 

What was his response? 

What do you need help with?” 

I honestly didn’t know what to say, because it never occurred to me that it could be that easy

No nagging… no complaining… just “I need help!”

And then he offered  to take on a few of the things I didn’t feel I could do alone. 

Wow! 

I got the result I wanted simply from changing the way I was communicating and being distinct and clear about what I wanted.

He wanted to help me, he just needed to be able to hear what I was saying without the “static” of complaints, reasons, and justifications for it. . 

When communicating what you want with your partner, make sure you use short, distinct comments that clearly state what you want. 

“I want to go for a walk.” 

“I’m disappointed because I was looking forward to seeing you.” 

“I don’t want to do these dishes right now.” 

Clearly stating what you want allows the other person to hear you. 

It really is that simple. 

Another important part of communicating effectively in a relationship is making sure your intention for the conversation is clear and that you let go of any attachment to how the other person may respond. 

Intention is the umbrella under which the conversation happens, and it’s the compass that guides it. 

Your reason for communicating can’t be about trying to get the other person to do or say something. It has to be 100% about saying what you want to say in order to stay in alignment with what is true for you, regardless of how he may react.

Be very careful with this ,because your ego will try and get in the way. 

Be honest with yourself and make sure your emotions are in a place where your pure intention is  to create what you want — love, peace and connection vs being right or getting an apology. 

If you’re not clear about what you want to say and why, postpone the conversation until you are. 

Ineffective communication is the #1 breakdown in relationships, and mastering how you can create the kind of relationship you want to create is the key to success. If you’d like support in seeing how you can create more clarity and impact through your communication, book a call with us now!

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Having clarity of intention, making sure your emotions are clear prior to the conversation, knowing what you want and don’t want, and letting go of attachment are the keys to having meaningful conversations that create deeper intimacy, connection and love in a relationship. 

Let us support you!

Lots of love, 

Gladys & Michelle

The Love Twins

How To Get the Love RIGHT NOW!

How To Get the Love RIGHT NOW!

by Gladys Diaz 

How long has it been since your last significant relationship?
And, if you’re in a relationship, how long has it been since you felt truly happy in it?

A month?
A year?
Several years?

This has been a recurring theme for women stepping in. For some it’s been two, five or seven years since their last relationship or since they felt truly happy in their relationships For some it’s been 12 or even 15 years! 

Oh, my heart just aches that it’s been that long since they’ve had that love and partnership they deserve and desire.

I’m so glad they found us! 

Let me ask you another question. 

How many times in the last 2 months have you heard the term, “stay at home,” “be careful,” or “stay safe.”
It’s only natural for you to be feeling the urge to push pause on your dreams. 

That’s why we feel called to say that the time to make your relationship dreams come true is RIGHT NO

Whether it’s been two months or two years or two decades since your last relationship, the time is now to create the relationship of your dreams – regardless of what the current situation says is possible

Life is still happening!  It may look a bit different right now, but life is still going on and there are things in your life that still get to be created during this time. 

Love is one of them! 

You can be careful and safe in order to protect your health and still be open to creating the relationship and love you desire. 

What you can’t be is frantic, fearful or closed off – because that will only have you attract more of the same. 

Even while you are staying at home, this is not the time to be isolated and alone. 

This is the time to be creating community as you work through the Love Barriers that are keeping you from experiencing the amazing desires you have in your heart. 

Now is the time to create the relationship of your dreams – with the right guidance

Unless you’re a professional baker, baking a cake probably wouldn’t be very much fun without a recipe or  guidance on how to do it, right? 

If you were just trying to figure it out, it would feel frustrating and probably wouldn’t turn out very good either!

Trying to create a relationship all on your own is the same. When you don’t know what to do, how to do it, and the best way to do it, it can be frustrating and “hard.”

Get the support you need so you can have fun with it!

The doors for our Ready For Love NOW program close tonight at midnight, so the time to join is now

This isn’t just a program.

This is a movement

There are 60 other women who have already stepped in. 60 women who have said yes to their lives, to themselves and to love!

I have such a strong feeling that these women are going to take this and spread it to other women in the world. They are stepping forward during a time when, from the outside, it looks like there is no hope, and they are reigniting the fire in their hearts! 

There is so much power in surrounding yourself with powerful women, thought leaders, and others who are working toward the same goals as you! 

So will you join us? 

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

(If there aren’t any slots available before midnight, that means other women grabbed the available spots.  Simply choose another time, and we’ll make sure we note that you reached out to us before midnight.)

This 12-week program is going to teach you how to break through the Love Barriers that are holding you back from creating the love you want. 

It’s going to support you in how to take care of yourself emotionally, physically and mentally so you can be the type of woman you could fall in love with! 

And most importantly, at the end of the 12 weeks, you’re going to walk away from this program being so completely in love with yourself that a man won’t be able to help but fall in love with you, too. (And you may even have found your man! – This has been known to happen during our programs, so we wouldn’t be surprised!)

What will it feel like to know you are worthy of love, to be open to love and to know  that you have the skills to create the love your heart desires? 

What will it feel like when you have found your man and get to bask in the love, passion, joy, and companionship you have waited for for so long? 

And, if you’re in a relationship, what will it feel like to know that you you know that you are loved and adored by the man that you love?

Well, it’s time to stop imagining and start making it happen! Let the waiting end now! 

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Lots of love, 

Gladys & Michelle

The Love Twins

Confidence: How to Be Absolutely Irresistible to a Man

Confidence: How to Be Absolutely Irresistible to a Man

by Gladys Diaz 

When you hear the word confident what comes into your mind? 

A name of someone you know or someone you admire? 

An act of confidence – something you do? 

An image that exudes confidence? 

For me – the first thing that always comes into my mind when I hear the word confident, is an image of Audrey Hepburn. That woman just exuded confidence. She was soft, feminine and graceful in her way of being, yet so strong and sure. 

What does confidence look like to you? 

Confidence looks like smiling and looking others in the eye. 

It looks like kindness. 

It looks like knowing who you are and what you want and not being afraid to share it. 

On the other hand, arrogance looks like trying to prove something. Without the deep knowing that she is worthy, a woman who lacks  real confidence has to do things and have others give her validation in order to feel confident. 

Real confidence is irresistible.

And I’m not talking about personality, either. You may be outgoing and exuberant in your interactions with people and still lack confidence. Or you may be more subdued and quiet, but carry the essence of power and confidence. 

Confidence is a way of BEing. 

So what does confidence look like in dating and relationships? 

Like we said, confidence looks like knowing who you are, what you want, and not being afraid to express it.  

We’re talking to a lot of women right now who have been meeting amazing men on dating apps during quarantine, and now that things are starting to open back up, still aren’t quite feeling ready to meet someone new in person.

How do you feel about it? 

However you feel about it, confidence looks like being true to yourself and not being afraid of what the other person may say or do. 

If a man that you’ve been interacting with on the app now asks if you’d like to meet and you’re still not feeling safe, you can say, “I’d love to meet you when all of this completely clears up. For now, I’d prefer to continue getting to know you here.” 

This lets him know that you are interested in him.  You’re simply not ready to meet in person yet.

And then he can do what feels right to  him with that information. 

Whatever his reaction is, you can know that you stood  confidently in what was true for you. 

Now, here’s another question we get asked a lot: Does asking a man out on a date exude confidence?

We don’t think so. 

There is a difference between confidence and pursuing.

When you ask a man on a date, you are doing it out of the fear that if you don’t, then he won’t, and you cheat yourself out of the experience of him asking you out. 

Instead, when you stand in the confidence of your worth and know that the right men will ask you out, you exude real confidence and that is simply irresistible to men. 

So here’s the question for you now: 

How confident are you that you can create the relationship you want on your own?

You see, we’re here to support you in developing the skills and knowing the steps to be able to say and get what you want. 

These are the skills that will support you in creating the relationship of your dreams:

Communication skills, relationship skills and confidence. 

Remember, confidence is a way of BEing. It’s something that’s developed through conscious practice. And we want to support you in creating such a knowing of your own value and worth that you radiate it through who you are being. 

So if you’re ready to step past your fears and create a relationship with yourself that is so next- level that your confidence shines through the roof, then book a call with us now! 

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

I’ve been with Ric for 21 years and Michelle’s been with Arnie for 13. We know what it to keep relationships going and growing stronger year after year!

We’re both just as in love and passionate about our partners now as the day we met them – if not incredibly more! 

We want that for you, too!

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Lots of love, 

Gladys & Michelle

The Love Twins

Stop the Arguing and Start Thriving in Your Relationship!

Stop the Arguing and Start Thriving in Your Relationship!

by Gladys Diaz 

Do you feel like you and your partner can’t agree on anything? 

Do you like to talk about things and he prefers to think it through first?

When disagreements arise, do tension and arguments rise, too? 

Do you feel like you don’t know how your differences can work in your relationship? 

Let me tell you this.

“It’s not disagreements that’s tearing your relationship apart. It’s the way you’re disagreeing.”  

Ric and I are like the yin and yang. We are two complete opposite puzzle pieces that couldn’t be more different. 

We feel differently about religion, about politics and lots of other things! We are extremely different! And there was a time when I wasn’t sure our relationship would survive.

When I look back on that time in our marriage, I am embarrassed because I had to be right about everything! I would correct everything he did. Even the smallest things he did and said If he did them differently than me, I would correct him. 

Almost every conversation we had, whether we were talking about paint, our dinner, or work, would end up in an argument, and I would end up in another room crying because I was so upset about how such a simple conversation could end so badly.

Can you relate? 

The thing is we all have an Ego – that part of our brain that wants to keep us safe and wants us to be right, no matter what the cost. And, as human beings with an Ego, sometimes we don’t realize that we are giving away our happiness in our effort to be right. 

It is painful and exhausting to be in the experience of always fighting over things you don’t agree on. 

Your fear that possibly you made the wrong choice when you picked your partner, or that, if you were right for each other it wouldn’t be so hard is often the thing that is triggering your need to be right. 

Sometimes we think that if two people are meant to be together, they’ll like all the same things, think the same way, and make the same choices

That couldn’t be farther from the truth!

Again, remember the yin and yang? Your differences and individuality are the things that brought you together, and they are the things that will keep you together – IF you learn how to respect and appreciate them. 

You first need awareness of the pattern – because, more than likely, it’s happening automatically. 

So, ask yourself honestly: 

Does this resonate with you? 

Do you put your partner down?

Do you correct and try to get him to agree with you?

I guarantee that your intention is not to hurt each other – I know mine wasn’t!

But are you reacting to a subconscious fear or belief and, in the process, making him wrong? 

Awareness is just the first step in the process. There are communication and relationship skills that will help you transform your differences from this recurring experience of disagreeing and fighting into something beautiful that actually brings you closer together.  

Relationships require at least one person in the relationship being willing to show up at her strongest so that things work well, and if you desire a happy, healthy, connected and passionate relationship that will last a lifetime, then we have something special for you! 

We’re  so excited to be inviting you to the Reignite the Spark Masterclass, happening tomorrow, Saturday, May 9th at 12pm Eastern! 

In three information-packed hours, you’ll learn exactly how to break through the patterns that have been sabotaging your relationship, inspire your partner’s love and desire, and deepen the love and intimacy in your relationship (yes, even during these stressful times), so that you can create the happy, loving relationship that will last well beyond this pandemic. In fact… It will last for a lifetime!

Grab your spot for the Reignite the Spark Masterclass here!

Just like two puzzle pieces that are shaped exactly the opposite of one another in order to complete the puzzle , two very different people can fit together perfectly, despite their differences, and create a beautiful masterpiece when they learn how to fit together.

We’re here to show you how! 

Lots of love, 

Gladys & Michelle

The Love Twins

If You’re Not Growing, You’re Choosing To Stay Stuck

If You’re Not Growing, You’re Choosing To Stay Stuck

by Gladys Diaz 

“I’m having a hard time sleeping at night.” 

“Focusing during the day feels nearly impossible.” 

“I feel unsettled.” 

“I feel helpless and powerless.” 

These are some of the things we’ve been hearing from women this week. 

Have you been feeling at all similar? 

With what feels like our whole world turned upside down over the last couple of weeks, we want you to know that we are right there with you. We’re living in the same world as you, experiencing the same situations and circumstances that the rest of the world and country are dealing with at this time. 

You truly are not alone.

And, although we may not have much control over our situation or circumstance right now, the thing we do have control over is how we choose to deal with it. 

There is no better time than right now to master your mindset

What does that look like? 

  1. Feel what you need to feel. Mastering your mindset doesn’t look like brushing things under the rug or pretending you don’t feel the way you feel. Acknowledge where you’re at and allow yourself to be there for a minute… Just don’t stay there.
  2. Shift. Ask yourself “What I do so that  I can deal with this in an empowered way?”

For example, maybe you’re feeling like dating is out the window right now. Maybe you’re using COVID-19 as a distraction to stop you from moving forward. Or maybe you’re feeling depressed that you’re finally ready to date, and now you can’t leave your house. 

Did you know that, while 25% of Americans are staying inside their homes right now, Bumble has seen a 23% increase in Seattle and New York (two of the cities that have been hit the hardest and that are being ordered to stay inside).  And those numbers aren’t just reflecting swiping. These are people engaged in conversations. 

Men are saying that they have had such a hard time making the shift to online dating, because they were so afraid of not getting a response, and now it’s all there is, so they are being bolder! We are hearing the most fun stories from our clients who are getting creative with dating — having Facetime dates, grocery store dates, and picnics where they are keeping the 6-foot recommended distance — and moving forward with it anyways. 

Life is still happening. 

Even though we may be stuck inside and getting used to our new normal, life is still happening around us and we can choose to create the things we’ve always wanted now. 

The world is coming together right now. This is the most worldwide impactful event since WWII. 

Yes, there is uncertainty, and, where there is uncertainty, fear will be triggered. 

The thing is…. Humans are resilient.

There’s a reason why we’re still on this earth and dinosaurs aren’t! 

The human spirit has a natural instinct to adapt and keep moving forward, even under the hardest of circumstances. We feel a pull to keep growing and moving forward, no matter what. 

So, what are some things you can do to shift? 

For example, earlier this week, I was having a hard time focusing, so I went outside with my beach chair, a small table, my laptop, my Bible, and my books, and felt an immediate shift

I’ve been taking daily walks that I time precisely so that I can see the sunset.  It’s amazing how such simple things can make such a difference!

And, I’m immersing myself in books, videos, and audios that are focused on empowerment, prosperity, and faith!

Here are some ideas we’ve gotten  from women we’ve been speaking with: 

  • Go for a walk and pick some wildflowers from your neighborhood. 
  • Take extra time to practice self-care – do your own nails, give yourself a facial, light some candles and relax. 
  • Read all the books you never made time to read before! 
  • Pray and meditate. 
  • Listen to positive podcasts. 
  • Cook your favorite foods. 
  • Purge clothes and organize your house. 
  • Dance to your favorite music. 
  • Create a cozy space in your home you can escape to when you need some space. 

Many things may be cancelled, but life is not! 

Another thing that’s not cancelled is having meaningful conversations and connecting with others in creative ways. 

Neither are your dreams. You still get to have the life and love you’ve always wanted.  Don’t let fear or social distancing try to cheat you out of believing that!

If you’d like to talk about how this time can be an opportunity for you, instead of a block, let’s hop on a call and have a conversation about what you can do for yourself and for your dreams right now, regardless of what’s going on around you!

 Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Our prayers for peace are with you. 

Lots of love,

Gladys & Michelle

The Love Twins

Are You Being Used?

Are You Being Used?

by Gladys Diaz 

Are you afraid of being taken advantage of by men? 

Do you seem to consistently attract men that “need” something”?

Do you feel like men only want sex from you and that once they have gotten it, they disappear? 

Is your experience that men always need your “fixing”? 

If this seems to be your experience in dating and relationships, know that you are not alone. In our work with thousands of women, this is the #1 limiting belief that women have about men and relationships. 

And the thing is, for those with this fear, it is 100% real to them.

That’s why we wanted to share this message first thing in this new year!

If this is what you are experiencing or feel like you are experiencing — basically if this is your paradigm for relationships — it’s because you’ve had an experience in the past that created this belief. 

Warning signs that you have this belief are that:

  • you have the experience of over-giving and not receiving back a relationship
  • you feel as if you’re being used for sex
  • you’re helping a man “gets back on his feet,” or being used financially
  • you feel like you must be “needed” in order for someone to love you, and that if they don’t “need” you, then they will leave you

Think about your last 3-4 relationships? Was this showing up? 

If these signs have shown up in three or more of your past relationships, then there’s a pattern that needs shifting!

This pattern comes from a belief that you created because of a past experience. 

And that belief was most likely created years before your first date. 

One example of something you may have experienced as a child is having something happen that led you to believe you had to DO something EXTRA in order to be loved.

When you have this belief, you will attract men who need you, need help, need support, and you feel like you are always the one doing the helping or “fixing.” 

So ask yourself – 

Are you noticing these patterns in your relationships?

Are you having painful experiences in dating? 

OR are you holding yourself back and not having experiences with men because of this fear? 

The first step to shifting fears is to recognize that they are present, so be honest with yourself here. 

If this sounds like you, then start to pay attention to these things when you are dating… 

  1. Are you over-giving? Are you giving to another person to the point that you are not honoring yourself? 
  2. Are you taking time to really get to know someone? Are you holding back in a healthy way so you don’t give too much too soon? Are you giving yourself the opportunity of time to get to know someone so you know that can trust the other person and his intentions? 
  3. Are you looking for consistency in words and actions in the men you are dating?
  4. Are you feeling safe to be generous and give love freely because you are receiving in return? 

Sometimes you need help recognizing these patterns in your life. We want you to know that so much of the pain you experience in love, dating, and relationships is unnecessary and avoidable!  

If you feel like this is a belief you have, and you’re having a hard time recognizing or shifting the pattern, let us help you do the HeartWork to break past it. 

You get to be loved freely, and to be loved freely  in return. 

And you don’t have to do it alone. 

Schedule a Love Breakthrough and set yourself free!

 Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Lots of love, 

Gladys & Michelle

The Love Twins

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