by Michelle Roza
You are a high-value woman. You have an incredible career, you’ve built an amazing life, and you know how to command a boardroom.
But when it comes to love, you don’t feel like you’re seen, heard, or understood?
The problem isn’t you.
It’s how you communicate that makes the difference in whether a man hears you.
It’s about a subtle but powerful shift that can change everything. It’s about moving into a place of power.
It’s time to learn the communication secrets that will not only inspire respect but also create the real, deep connection you’ve been craving.
The Patterns of Overexplaining, Controlling, or Self-Editing
I want to illustrate this with a story about one of my clients, we’ll call her Jessica, a brilliant executive who was a powerhouse in her field. In her career, she was known for her sharp, direct communication. But in her dating life, she was a different person.
She’d get nervous on dates, feeling like she had to fill every moment with chatter. She’d send long, detailed text messages and felt frustrated when the men she was dating didn’t respond in kind.
She got asked out on lots of first dates, but that’s where it would end.
And here’s why:
She was falling into a pattern we see so often. When you overcommunicate, you come across as not being confident in who you are and how you communicate. And if you’re trying to control everything, it’s because you’re operating from the fear that things won’t work out otherwise.
It’s as if you’re trying to earn your place, prove your worth, or make sure things go the way you want them to.
Jessica had a subconscious belief that if she didn’t manage every interaction, it would fall apart.
She was operating from a place of “not enough,” believing she had to do more to be seen and valued.
This led to a communication breakdown and a cycle of disappointment.
Sound familiar?
The Breakthrough: Communicating with Feminine Power
Jessica’s breakthrough came when she realized that the solution wasn’t to “be less” but to communicate in a feminine way.
This had nothing to do with being submissive or quiet. Instead, it was about shifting from an anxious, reactive energy to a calm, grounded one.
We worked on what it meant to have full expression not about being loud, but about clarity, authenticity, and alignment.
This was a powerful reframe for her. She began to ask herself, “When was the last time I felt held back in how I communicated?”
The answer was often, “Every time I felt insecure.”
If this resonates with you, then here’s how you can transform your communication and experience in dating by embracing two core principles:
- Speak with Clarity, Not Apology: Speaking your truth directly. Don’t hedge around what you say and don’t apologize for what you say. For example, when you want to suggest a different restaurant, say, “I’d love to try that new Italian place,” instead of, “I hope you don’t mind, but would it be okay if we went somewhere else?” This small change had a massive impact.
- Embrace the Power of Silence: It’s okay to experience silence on a date. If you stay quiet enough, he may start sharing more and you can receive. This simple act of receiving allows men to step up and take the lead in conversation, which makes them feel more engaged and invested.
The Result: Becoming Magnetic and Irresistible
As your communication patterns evolve so will the men you’re attracting!
By learning to speak with grace, you’ll began to embody the energy of grace which is open, inviting, and compassionate.
This has a magnetic effect!
Jessica learned that owning your voice gains you respect and has you call in the right man.
She was no longer settling for what she “almost wanted”.
She was now attracting men who were strong enough to meet her in her power and who celebrated her authentic voice.
And as you practice these communication skills, the same will be true for you!
When you bring your authentic energy, you become magnetic and attract men of the same energy.
Your communication is the key that unlocks true connection.
It’s time to stop shrinking and start speaking your truth with confidence and grace.
When you do, you’ll inspire respect and call in a man who is ready for a love story as incredible as you are.