by heartsdesireintl | Sep 9, 2014 | Coaching, Dating, Heart's Desire International, heartache, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship Advice, Romance, Success
by Gladys Diaz
Have you ever felt like something is just too hard and it’s time to give up – even when it’s something you really want or believe in, like a dream or a goal you’ve been working on for some time?
Many times, when I’m on my runs, I tell myself I’m not going to stop until I reach a certain distance. There are times when my legs are aching, sweat is dripping into my eyes, and I feel like my chest will explode, and I just want to stop. And, sometimes, I do. But the moment I do, I check the app I use while running, and if I haven’t reached that preset distance, I will literally say to myself aloud, “Don’t you dare stop now!”
Pretty tough, right?
Well, I’ve found that sometimes I need to get real with myself, or else I’ll quit before it’s time to stop. If I don’t remind myself of what my goals are, the milestone I set, and why I’m doing something, left to my own devices, I’ll quit when things get a little too uncomfortable for me – whether it’s in running, a goal I’ve set for myself in business, my well-being, and, yes, my relationship.
What about you? Are you getting ready to give up on something?
I speak to a lot of women – women of all ages, cultures, and relationship statuses – and there’s common question that comes up:
“Do you think there’s hope for me?”
Maybe you’re a single woman who’s become frustrated with dating unavailable men or men you’re not really attracted to, or the fact you haven’t gone on a date for months (or years) and you’re wondering whether you’re just meant to be alone.
Maybe you’ve been in an on-again-off-again relationship for several years, or one in which you’ve been waiting for him to commit or proposed to you, or things just seem to be unraveling at the seams, and you wonder whether it’s time to call it quits.
Maybe you’re in a marriage where things have been on a downward spiral for a while, or you feel like you’re just housemates or co-parents, and you wonder whether it’s even worth possible to bring the love and romance you once shared together.
And maybe you’re like many of my clients and you’ve taken several courses, read many books, and done a ton of spiritual and inner work and you’re asking yourself why these thing seem to lead everyone else in the directions of their dreams, but not yours, and you’re wondering whether there’s simply something “broken” inside of you.
I don’t know where you are, but I do know this:
The only surefire way to not reach your goals and for your dreams not to come true is for you to decide to give up!
That’s the only thing that will guarantee that you won’t get what your heart desires.
So, I’m going to say this with all of my love:
Don’t you dare stop now!
What if there’s something you didn’t know you could do to turn your love life around?
What if there’s just a little more work to do to finally get the things that have been blocking love from coming to you out of your way?
What if the next guy you meet in person or online is the one who’s been looking for you all along?
What if the man you love is just waiting for a sign that you’re not ready to give up on your relationship?
What if there is still hope?
Are you seriously willing to give up without doing everything you can to make your dreams come true?
If you’re not ready to give up yet, then take out a piece of paper and answer these questions:
- What is it that my heart truly desires?
- What is making me want to stop and is in the way of me having this be realized in my life?
- Is there someone who or something that can help me discover how to get past this?
- Am I courageous enough to reach out for help and do what it takes and not give up?
- What’s the next action step I will take, rather than stop and give up?
I know you’re tired. I know you’re afraid. But I also know that you can be courageous and unstoppable. I know you can take that next action step. And I know that you don’t have to do it alone!
If you’d like support (and a nice, hard push) in taking that next step, then you can always reach out to me and step up a time to talk!
I’m not giving up on you, so don’t you dare give up on you, either!
by heartsdesireintl | Sep 3, 2014 | Coaching, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship Advice, Romance, Success
by Gladys Diaz
This week marks the official end of summer and start of the new school year for kids around the country. Each fall I’m reminded of how much I used to love this time of year when I was a teacher.
See, as teachers and students, we get the opportunity to start fresh and set new goals for ourselves 3 quarters into the “new year”!
Isn’t that great?
You know what’s even better?!?
You don’t have to be a parent, teacher or student to celebrate a Happy New Year today!
Think back to January of this year.
Did you create a Love Resolution for yourself?
Many of you joined us for our Love Resolution Call and created some truly amazing resolutions describing who you were resolving to be this year to attract and create the loving relationship your heart desires.
So… Did you do it?
What I mean is, did you write out your Love Resolution and read it aloud to yourself twice a day, every day?
And, if so, did you reach your goal? Are you now in a happy, loving, intimate relationship? The relationship of your dreams?
If you did, please, contact us and let us know. Send us a picture! Let us celebrate your love with you and the rest of the world! (Make sure you read Patricia’s testimonial, below!)
If you didn’t…
First, stop making yourself “wrong” about it! You didn’t do what you didn’t do. That’s true.
What’s also true is that you can start your new year TODAY!
There are still 4 months left in this calendar year and so much can happen in four months if you commit to taking the steps right now to transform yourself and your love life!
I’ve had clients meet the man of their dreams in less than four months.
I’ve had clients turn their marriages – the ones they were ready to give up on – in less than four months.
I’ve had women who had been waiting to hear that magical question for years get proposed to in less than four months!
Miracles can happen in less than four months, and some of those miracles can be YOURS!
But you have to be willing to do what you’ve been unwilling to do until now.
You have to be willing to stop resisting, putting off, and excusing away the thing you say is important to you!
If you’re like most people, too many times you pretend that the things that are most important to you – like being in a loving, passionate, intimate, and fun relationship – don’t really matter.
You minimize just how much your heart desires it.
You let yourself off the hook and make excuses for not taking the steps you know will lead you in the direction of making that dream come true.
You start focusing on other things – work, school, hobbies – to ignore the pain and disappointment of having another year go by where you find yourself either alone or lonely inside of a relationship.
Why do you do that?
Well, if you’ve been on our list for even a little while, you know the answer: Fear.
You’re afraid you want what you really want.
Most of all, you’re so afraid you won’t have what you really want that you’ll self-sabotage your way out of having and experiencing it.
So, here’s my invitation.
Take a good look at yourself and your life – especially your love life.
Is it everything you want and hope for it to be?
Are you experiencing and living the life and love your heart desires?
If you are, as I said before, please share with us!
If you’re not, then it’s time for you to get real with yourself and choose whether or not you are willing to start making your goals and dreams come true.
Today is the day you can choose to begin taking committed and inspired action that is aligned with your goals and dreams of being in the type of relationship your heart desires with an absolutely amazing man!
Today can be the beginning of your very own Happy New Year!
I have only 2 more spots left in my private coaching program for the remainder of this year. That’s it. After that, you’ll have to wait until 2015 to begin working with me, which means putting your dreams offeven longer. That’s not what I want for you.
So, don’t keep waiting for something to somehow, magically change or happen on its own. This is up toyou!
You have the power to create and make that relationship a reality, and I can teach you the skills and tools you need to start making it happen now!
Just click the link below and reserve a time to speak with me now!
<<<Click here to schedule your Ready for Love Session now!>>>
Again, I have only 2 spots left.
Time’s not stopping.
The clock’s still ticking.
This is your time to make your relationship dreams come true!
Here’s a message my client, Patricia, just sent me:
I created my Love Resolution for myself in January and happy to say I reached my goal! I am now living a happy, loving, intimate relationship, the relationship of my dreams with my fiancee, Ruvin! We were engaged after 4 months!
<<<Click here to schedule time to talk now!>>>
Right now really is the time. Think about where you were four months ago.
Is where you are now where you hoped you would be? If not, then stop wasting precious time!
Reach out and set up a time to talk with me so that I can help you get started on making your dreams come true before 2015 gets here!
by heartsdesireintl | Aug 12, 2014 | Coaching, Gratitude, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Relationship Advice, Success
by Gladys Diaz
In June I had the opportunity to be interviewed by friend and colleague, Gina Hussar. She was hosting The “IT” Factor Master Class I invited you to attend. The other day, as I was listening to the recording of the interview, I thought, “Everyone in our community needs to hear this! I need to share this with them!”
Gina has been generous enough to allow me to share this short interview with you so that you can eavesdrop on our conversation! I invite you grab something with which to take notes and soak up some of the tips and secrets that have lead me to having the life, business, and relationship my heart desires!
In this interview, I share:
- My story – which was not always “pretty” or easy – of how I came to be where I am today, which is where I believe heart, body, and soul is where I was created to be!
- How our book 30 Days and 30 Ways to Fall In Love with YOU! was created
- Universal Values for Success in life, business, and love
- One of my favorite rituals, which has gotten and still gets me through some of the scariest moments of my life!
I hope you enjoy this interview and that you’ll share with me the what you feel were you biggest take-aways you will use in your own life!
Click below to listen to this life-changing interview
Questions? Comments? Let us know below! We love hearing from you!
You can learn more about Gina and the amazing work she does by visiting her website: 30secondstopeace.com
by heartsdesireintl | Jul 31, 2014 | Communication, Dating, Forgiveness, Heart's Desire International, Infidelity, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Parenting, Relationship Advice, Romance, Self-Love, Sex
by Gladys Diaz
The other day, Michelle and I had a very powerful interview with Bill Weil for his “Conscious Couples Conversation” program.
In this interview, we dove deep and talking about some of the most common questions we get asked when it comes to relationships, including:
- The higher purpose of relationships
- The difference between how men and women define and experience love and respect
- The natural power women have to create and transform relationships
- The most common mistakes women make in relationships
- The essential ingredients for having a loving, intimate relationships
- The 3 R’s for keeping the love alive in your relationship
- How to have win-win arguments
And a lot more, including:
- An interesting story about the “twin connection” Michelle and I share
- How Michelle and I work together to coach women
- A beautiful excerpt from Michelle and Arnie’s wedding vows (so moving!)
Whether you are single or in a relationship, you will walk away from listening to this interview with a HUGE amount of information and inspiration for creating a loving, intimate, relationship!
Click the image below to listen to this POWER-FULL conversation!
Comment? Question about the interview? Let us know below! We love hearing from you!
by heartsdesireintl | Jul 25, 2014 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Forgiveness, Gratitude, HDI Blog, Heart's Desire International, heartache, Infidelity, Intimacy, Loss of a Spouse, Love, Marriage, Parenting, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance, Self-Love, Sex, Uncategorized
by Gladys Diaz
The other day, I was watching one of my favorite TV shows with my family and they were featuring a mother in her 40s who was almost 200 pounds overweight. She was beside herself with sadness and self-loathing because she said she had given up her dreams and could not believe how much she had let herself go after having been an athlete and gymnast in her youth.
Her reason for having gotten to this point?
Being a mom.
She shared how she had gotten pregnant in college and thrown herself into being “the perfect mom” and pastor’s wife. She described how she had put so much focus on being there for her kids that she’s lost herself and forgotten who she was.
I’d like to say this is an isolated incident, but it’s not.
One of the most common fears women share with us is that they are afraid of losing themselves in a relationship.
I work with women all over the world who are trying to prove that they are Superwoman or Supermom, doing everything, working themselves to the point of exhaustion, and ignoring their own needs so that they can please and impress others.
And this isn’t an issue that only affects mothers and wives. I also see women who are single and are throwing themselves into and losing themselves in their careers, giving all of themselves, their time and attention to their bosses and companies and leaving very little time or attention for having fun, dating, and just taking care of themselves.
Unfortunately, all of these women have forgotten that the MOST important relationship you will ever have is the one you have with yourself!
If you don’t take the time to care for yourself by making time to relax, laugh, play, nurture your mind, body, and spirit, you literally have nothing left to give – to yourself or anyone else!
Giving to the point of feeling depleted, mentally and physically exhausted –and many times resentful, because you feel you’re giving, giving, and giving without getting very much in return – not only leaves you unable to have the energy, patience, and enthusiasm to date or create a loving relationship, but also teaches people how to treat you. So it’s unfair to resent the boss who keeps adding things on your plate with no recognition or additional compensation, the PTA President who knows she can call you the night before to do a task that would take anyone else weeks, or your husband who is not helping you around the house or with the kids.
When you don’t take time to make time for yourself, don’t expect others to go out of their way to do that for you, either!
It’s essential that you do something for yourself daily. Whether it’s read a book, talk on the phone with a girlfriend, take that class you’ve been saying you want to take forever, or just sit and do nothing (one of my favorites!).
When you make your needs, dreams, and self-care a priority, you are letting yourself – and the rest of the world know – that you value yourself, believe in your dreams, and know that there isn’t a need to “sacrifice” what you love and makes you happy in order to be a great woman, partner, or mother.
You’ll also find that when you make yourself a priority, all of those people who you love and are trying to make happy will rally around you, be your biggest supporters, and help make sure you have time for yourself and to make your dreams come true!
As we were watching the show, my older son said, “Wow… She had to give up her dreams so she could take care of her kids? “
I responded, “No, she didn’t have to give up her dreams. She chose to. We get to create our lives and make our dreams come true. A woman can be a great mother, have a happy relationship, and still follow her dreams.”
His response?
“Oh, yeah, Mama. Like how you take care of us and you’re also helping your clients and building your dreams for Heart’s Desire!”
My response?
“Exactly!”
Comments? Questions? Let us know below! We love hearing from you!
by heartsdesireintl | Jul 22, 2014 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Forgiveness, Gratitude, HDI Blog, Heart's Desire International, heartache, Infidelity, Intimacy, Loss of a Spouse, Love, Marriage, Parenting, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance, Self-Love, Sex, Uncategorized
by Gladys Diaz
Yesterday was my husband’s birthday, and, at our house, I love making a big deal when it’s someone’s birthday by celebrating “Birthday Week.” During this week, the person gets to choose what we watch on TV, what we eat for dinner, and, basically is made to feel special all week long by everyone else in the house!
Well, Sunday night, I almost ruined Birthday Sunday for my husband. The boys had misplaced the remote control for the TV (again) and were arguing about it in the playroom. It was already late and past their bedtime, so my honey and I were ready for our “alone time,” so we could watch our shows and relax together.
When I saw that my husband was getting upset at the boys for arguing, I jumped in to “help.”
(Mistake #1 – Offering Unsolicited Help: Stepping in “to help” without there being a need or a request for it. This sends the message that you feel he is incapable of resolving the issue on his own. Instead, trust in your partner’s capability to resolve the situation himself. If he needs help, he’ll ask for it. By the way.. he probably won’t.).
The truth is that there really wasn’t any reason for me to jump in to “help.” My husband had the situation handled. I jumped in because didn’t want him to be upset with the boys (especially on Birthday Weekend) and I just wanted the arguing to stop. Now, even though these might be “good reasons” for stepping in, had I stayed on the couch and allowed him to handle things, it probably would have been resolved right away.
Instead, I jumped in and noticed that, the more I tried to “help,” the more angry he was getting. At first I thought he was angry with the kids, but, in retrospect, I can see that he must have felt like I didn’t trust him to handle the situation.
I did an exercise I do with the kids that helps them to remember where they last saw and held something, and, the remote was found!
(Victory #1 – Resolving the problem. This was short-lived, however, because of Mistake #2!)
Now, if I’d just left it at that, everyone would have felt happy, relieved, and the situation may have been over. However, for some reason, I simply had to make sure that I emphasized (rather loudly) that this is what you should do when you can’t find something.
(Mistake #2 – Proving I’m Right and You’re Wrong: This is an ego-driven need to prove the other person wrong. While there may be a sense of “victory” in having been “right,” essentially, there is no “winner” in this situation because your partner is left feeling as if he’s wrong or in some way “lesser than” you.)
Then, to prove my point further, as my husband was talking to the boys about them being responsible so that they don’t lose things, I butted in again to mentioned that things in the house don’t get “lost”; they simply get “misplaced.”
(Mistake #3 – Wanting to be “Right” AGAIN: This adds salt to the already-tender wound. By correcting or contradicting your partner, you once again disrespect him by pointing out how “right” you are. There is no demonstration of support or encouragement for your partner, which can leave him feeling upset and alone).
Well, that did it.
My husband yelled, “Okay, things in the house don’t get ‘lost,’ they are ‘misplaced! Is that better?’”
Now he was in an official funk…and so was I.
I was upset at myself for getting involved, sending the message that he couldn’t handle a simple situation, and that I was the one with the “right” solution. I saw how disrespectful and condescending I’d been. I was ashamed and angry with myself, especially since that’s not the way I am committed to treating my husband.
I wish I could say that I immediately apologized and that we were soon in a snuggly, blissful space, but that wouldn’t be true. It took me a while to get to the point that I could forgive myself enough to apologize to him. I made a first attempt to apologize, but I have to admit that it wasn’t very sincere. It came from a place of trying to “fix” things. I think he could tell, because he remained cold.
A little while later, I noticed it was past midnight (we always try to be the first to wish the other a Happy Birthday). I moved closer to him on the couch, looked him in the eye, and said, “I’m sorry I disrespected you, and I know you’re upset. I just want to say ‘Happy Birthday.’”
He leaned forward, we kissed, and I snuggled up next to him and said a prayer of thanks. (smile)
In the past, I wouldn’t have apologized. I would have made it seem like it was not such a big deal and then made him wrong (again) for not forgiving me right away. Now, even when it’s hard, I choose to apologize – because that’s something I can be responsible for – and give him space to work through his own feelings.
(Victory #2: Sincerely Apologizing. It’s not always easy to admit when you’re wrong. However, if you can put aside your pride and realize that what’s more important than being right, staying angry, or pretending like nothing happened is restoring the intimacy in the relationship, then you also recognize that it’s really a small price to pay. And now you’ve got a win-win situation going!)
Having a loving and intimate relationship isn’t about perfection. You may not always say or do the right things.
So what can you when you’ve made a mistake that impacts the closeness and connection in your relationship?
You can continue to focus on becoming your best self.
You can forgive yourself and ask for forgiveness along the way for those times when you don’t reflect the best side of yourself.
And you can recommit to restoring intimacy in your relationship.
In doing all of these things you can be confident that you are on the path to creating the happy, loving, intimate relationships your heart truly desires.
Questions? Comments? Let us know below! We love hearing from you!
Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net
