Is He Lacking Integrity? Are You?

Is He Lacking Integrity? Are You?

by | Jul 7, 2020 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice

by Gladys Diaz 

What is your definition of integrity? 

The universal answers that probably come to mind are,”Being honest,” or “Doing the right thing when nobody’s watching.”

Here’s our definition:“Honoring your word to the same level that you honor yourself.” 

This looks like following through with the things you say you’ll do – both to yourself and to others. 

This looks like honoring your personal thoughts and beliefs. 

This looks like knowing what you want and not settling for less. 

There was a time in my life when I didn’t really think about integrity. It just wasn’t something that mattered to me. I thought that being ten minutes late was still being on time. I justified my behavior and figured that if I didn’t follow through on things, people would understand. 

The thing is, I had no idea what I was doing to myself subconsciously.

The fact is, I was destroying my confidence regarding what I deserved. I was destroying the level of belief I had in myself about what I could create and accomplish.

Every time I took a job that paid less than what I wanted, I was diminishing  my personal integrity. 

Every time I called a guy I liked after I’d promised myself I’d wait to hear from him. I was showing that I didn’t believe I was worth being honest to. 

Every time I didn’t stick to a diet or exercise plan ,I was lowering my ability to trust myself.

I didn’t see that what I said mattered. 

The problem with this is that you can’t create a powerful life if you can’t trust yourself.

Every time I lowered my integrity, my life got more chaotic. 

And, finally I had a powerful wake-up call. 

“What if I started living my life by what I say matters?”

Guess what happened?

Well, when it comes to dating,I stopped tolerating certain things. If a guy said he’d call at a certain time and he didn’t, I noticed. If he did it time and time again I would choose to let him go. 

I stopped dating men that were separated, but still married. 

I raised my standards and stopped dating men who lied, did marijuana, and had lower standards than me. 

By raising my standards, I raised my awareness.

I realized that I could choose, and I started to choose differently. 

I started dating men who cared about integrity, too, and that made all the difference.

What if you were living your life like what you say matters? What might change?  

The #1 thing that improves self confidence is following through with the things you say you’ll do – both to others AND to yourself. 

Even the little things!

You can’t attract what you don’t create. You must start with yourself and have a look at your own level of integrity. 

When it comes to dating, you get to choose what you tolerate in a relationship – you get to decide!

We get it, sometimes emotions and attraction take over and we make concessions and accept behavior we don’t like. 

That’s why you need to be aware and awake.

Does he show up late or cancel 50% of the time? 

Does he treat you well both publicly and privately? 

Are you tolerating something you don’t want to have in a relationship?

These are just the beginning of the questions you can ask yourself to make sure you are creating or in the kind of  relationship you’d like to be in. 

And, if it appears that you’re in a relationship that lacks respect and integrity – look at yourself first. Be honest with yourself about whether or not you are respecting and being in integrity with yourself.

Don’t waste time and energy on things that don’t matter. Let him go.

Choose what you’ll tolerate.

Believe that you’re available to men who have and demonstrate integrity. 

There’s power in that.

If you’d like support diving into the questions that will bring you what you really desire in a relationship and what you may be tolerating to light, we’d love to speak with you!

Let us be the powerful wake-up call that supports you in creating the love and mutually respectful relationship you really want!

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Creating the life and relationship you want is always an internal job. If you’re attracting or in relationship with men that lie, don’t follow-through, or lack integrity in some other way – it’s time to take a look inward. We’re here to help you course-correct that so that you can experience the love and happiness your heart desires.

We’ve got you.

Do You Work On Your Relationship Every Day?

Do You Work On Your Relationship Every Day?

by | Jun 26, 2020 | breakups, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Love, Marriage, Success

by Gladys Diaz 

Is your relationship or relationship status something you think about every day? 
Not from a place of “desperation,” but from a place of commitment to having what you want?

Are your daily actions and choices aligned with creating the relationship of your dreams? 

Being in committed action about the things that are important to you creates confidence and is the path to manifesting what you want. 

So what choices can you make every day that will get you closer to creating the relationship your heart desires?  

Here are five choices you can make everyday to get you closer to creating the passionate, loving, fun relationship you really want.

  1. Be Crystal-Clear About What You Want. 

Without crystal-clarity, you get blurriness. In relationships, this looks like having bits and pieces of the kind of relationship you want to experience, but not quite having it ALL.  Each and every day, declare what the relationship of your dreams looks like and feels like. Don’t focus on  the qualities the man will possess or what he needs to have but what the two of you will create and experience together. 

If you want to experience happiness in the relationship, what does that look and feel like for you?

Do you want to laugh and smile together?

Are you going to be spontaneous and adventure together?

Get clear on what you truly  want and declare it daily.

2. Set Your Intention. 

Everyday, set an intention of what you are going to create and who you are going to be that day. Maybe you declare you’re going to “have fun and learn something new. Then, throughout the day make sure your actions align with that intention. 

BE and bring the fun! BE interested and interesting. 

Whether you’re going on a date, spending time with your partner, or just going about your normal day, you have the power to create and BE the experience you want to have. 

3. Start Smiling and Stop Complaining

This one isn’t just about smiling and not complaining. It’s about focusing your energy and attention on what you DO want to see and experience so that you are finding evidence of that all around you.  It’s about BEing the things you would like to see in a partner and attracting them to you. 

You attract who you are, so BE the love you want to see!. 

Everything we see is a projection of how we see ourselves. The more we become what we want, the more we will find it outside of ourselves. 

When you stand in this power you step into the power of creating, attracting and manifesting, instead of hoping, waiting or forcing things to happen. 

And that’s irresistible!

4. Experience and Express Gratitude.

In each moment that you see something beautiful or experience something you feel gratitude for, stop for a moment. 

Give yourself a few seconds to really feel the gratitude and love you’re experiencing. 

This is one of the most transformational practices you can begin implementing in your life!

Simply try it and see if you don’t start calling more goodness into your life! 

5. Choose your words wisely.

The words you say, both out loud and in your head, are very important, because your subconscious becomes a detective for the words you think and say. 

As soon as you say the words, “Dating is hard” or “I’m really trying in my relationship, but it’s just not working” your brain starts to look for evidence that you’re right. 

So… what do you want to be right about?

Change those words to “Dating is fun!” and “My relationship is growing stronger everyday,” and see how you and your love life begin to transform!

If you’d like some support in raising your self-awareness so that you can really start to understand how you can stop patterns that aren’t working for you and choose thoughts, words and actions that are aligned with your love vision, we’d love to talk to you!  Just click on the link below and schedule a Love Breakthrough Session.

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

This call will help you see what’s in the way, how to get it out of the way, and what your next best steps are for moving in the direction of life and love your heart desires.

It’s so easy to become apathetic in your life when things aren’t working out the way you would like, or if they are taking longer to become reality then you’d like them to. 

When you choose to take daily actions that are aligned with what you want, then God and the universe can’t help but start to deliver it to you! 

So, who are you going to BE today? What are you going to CHOOSE?

Are You Ready to Call It Quits? Read This First!!

Are You Ready to Call It Quits? Read This First!!

by | Jun 19, 2020 | breakups, Coaching, Communication, Forgiveness, HDI Blog, Heart's Desire International, heartache, keeping the love alive, Love

by Gladys Diaz 

The last couple of weeks have brought to our attention something we’ve been preparing you for since March. 

Since the moment quarantine began, we’ve been anticipating a trend of more divorces to sweep the nation — and, actually, the world — in the months to follow. Unfortunately, it seems we were right. 

Just within this past week, multiple high-profile relationships have announced their plans to split up, all citing circumstances that just could no longer be ignored during quarantine. 

We’ve spoken with many women over the past several weeks who are feeling the exact same way in their relationship.

Here’s the thing).

Any issue that has come up in a relationship during this time was there before the pandemic. It’s simply been amplified because you can no longer escape it or distract yourself from facing it. 

The financial stress, fear of the unknown, health complications, overwhelm and anxiety that we’ve faced over these last several months, coupled with underlying problems in a relationship, are enough to push anyone over the edge. 

Quarantine has been the last straw in the proverbial bucket.

That being said, calling it quits is not the only option! 

It’s heartbreaking, because no one gets married expecting to get divorced, and we know that divorce comes with a lot of financial and emotional expenses, on top of everything else. 

Ending a long-term relationship is a big deal, sometimes costing upwards of $20,000-$30,000 in legal expenses, not to mention the work of splitting your assets, selling your home, and the strain it puts on the family unit and kids.

Now, we’re not saying that divorce or breaking up isn’t sometimes the best option, but it’s usually not, and it’s definitely not the only option.

On the spectrum between the most passionate, loving relationship and ending it altogether, there’s something in the middle – and that’s the opportunity to transform the relationship.  

So, if there is another option, why not try doing the Heartwork? 

When you do, everything transforms. 

And, when we say “everything,” we mean that the relationship transforms, as well as the family dynamics, work relationships, and  opportunities that open up.

Because you don’t just work on the relationship – you transform yourself in the process!

Last week, one of our clients said, “I’m so grateful I’m going through this program right now because I’m hearing what my friends are going through who aren’t getting support.” 

When you choose to get support, when you choose to see that it may be you that’s getting in the way of your own happiness, you allow yourself to recreate your marriage or relationship in a way that didn’t exist before. 

I remember one day, back when Ric and I were struggling in our relationship. I had lost my temper, thrown food in his car and he’d left. (Wow, we’ve come a long way from that!)

I remember thinking, “It’s got to be easier to be by myself!”

I also remember knowing that if I was going to make the decision to call it quits, then I was going to need to do everything I could do to make it work. And I knew I hadn’t done that  yet.

Sixteen years later, I’m soooooo glad I chose to figure out what wasn’t working and to do what I needed to do to transform myself from the inside out, which completely transformed my relationship! 

So, what about you? 

On a scale of 1 to 10 where is your relationship?

Has the pressure of the last few months brought up those underlying issues that it’s time to address? 

Have you caught yourself wondering if it would be easier to just throw in the towel?

Do you feel like you’ve done everything you can to make it work?

If you haven’t talked to us, you haven’t done everything. 

If you’ve found yourself wondering, “Are they talking to me?”, yes we are, and this is for you. 

If, as you’ve been reading, you’ve been thinking, “I wonder if this would work for me?” or maybe even, “I wonder if it still wouldn’t work,” we invite you to book a call.

Let’s have a conversation about what’s going on for you and your relationship, what your options are, and how you can turn things around.

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Here’s what we know: We are experts in relationships, and our mission is for every woman — including YOU — to be in the passionate, loving, relationship of her dreams. 

We also know that if you do nothing, nothing changes.

Let us be there for you. 

Book a call now. 

It could save your relationship.

How to Be Someone to Be Admired

How to Be Someone to Be Admired

by | Jun 12, 2020 | Dating, Gratitude, Heart's Desire International, Love, Self-Love, Success, Successful Women

by Gladys Diaz 

Who’s someone you really admire? 

Someone you look up to? Someone who’s made a difference for you?

Who would you  like to be more like? 

What characteristics do they have that you admire? 

Do they show integrity? Are they authentic and real?
Maybe they have high energy that’s contagious.
Are they loving and generous?
Are they dignified and show grace under fire? 

Take Oprah, for example. There is just such an amazing way that she exemplifies grace under fire. She is compassionate while being rigorous. She is kind while being strong. She speaks up and takes a stand without being reactive. She is dignified.

Those are just a few of the things that we look up to in women. 

How about you? 

Oftentimes, we recognize things in others that we’d like to develop more of in ourselves. 

Whether you’re in a relationship or dating, it’s essential to be self-aware. To be able to recognize the places within yourself that are your opportunities for growth.  

We say, “opportunities for growth,” because it’s not that you’re doing anything wrong or that you’re trying to be something you’re not. One of the biggest sources of stress in dating and relationships comes from being inauthentic or trying to be someone you’re not. 

We say “opportunities for growth,” because recognizing the areas in which you’d like to develop are opportunities for higher levels of self-esteem, confidence and more desired experiences. 

And all of those things are highly attractive, right?

It’s like that awesome quote by Sophia Bush says:

“You are allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress simultaneously.” 

You can strive to develop yourself while also exercising self-love and grace and always striving to be your authentic best. 

So what are the ways of being you’d like to embody ?

Here are some ideas from our community: 

Confident

Real

Authentic

Good Listener

Forgiving

Genuine

Considerate

Respectful

Loving

Physically Fit

Graceful

Honest

Gentle

Integrity

A finisher

Committed

Disciplined

Focused

Owning a State of Ease

Sense of Humor

Smart

Generous

Grit

Humble

Solution Oriented

And those are just a start! 

What is it for you? 

Choose two ways of being that would make the biggest difference for you and for those around you that you can focus on embodying this week. 

And remember to make it fun!

There is a natural human desire to grow. There’s so much fulfillment and satisfaction that comes from recognizing your growth opportunities and doing something about them!

If you’d like help recognizing what some of those opportunities are for you, book a Love Breakthrough Call. That’s what we’re here for!

Sometimes, the thing holding us back is in our blind spot, and all it takes is someone to lovingly point it out, help us remove it and replace it with something else that makes all the difference.  

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

We look forward to hearing the ways in which you’re stretching yourself this week!

YOU can be the woman you most admire when you BE the love you want to see!

How to Be Part of the Solution

How to Be Part of the Solution

by | Jun 8, 2020 | Coaching, Forgiveness, Heart's Desire International, Love, Self-Love

by Gladys Diaz 

Today our message is a unique one. 

The past week has brought much heartache to our country and around the world. 

Massive amounts of fear are circulating – mixed with the emotions of frustration, anger and sadness. And all are understandable.

We aren’t pretending to know exactly what our People of Color (POC) brothers and sisters are experiencing. However, we do know that our hearts are feeling compassion, empathy and heartbreak for what is happening around us. 

You know our stand is love, and we want nothing more than to be part of the solution at this time. Our intention is to create connection, to listen, and to extend compassion and empathy to all. 

I read a quote from Elie Wiesel this week that deeply touched me. He says:

“We must take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. Sometimes we must interfere. When human lives are endangered, when human dignity is in jeopardy, national borders and sensitivities become irrelevant. Wherever men and women are persecuted because of their race, religion, or political views, that place must – at that moment – become the center of the universe.” 

This is why now is not the time to say, “All lives matter.” 

Do all lives matter? Absolutely! But in this moment, RIGHT NOW, it’s the time to take a stand for the injustice against black people that has gone on long enough in our country. 

If you’re feeling anger by what others are saying or doing – feel your feelings. They are not bad or wrong and are completely understandable. Your feelings are your right and it’s important that you process them! 

After the feelings are processed is when you can then communicate powerfully and clearly so that people can hear what you’re saying. 

And, to be clear, we realize that rioting is happening, and we want to distinguish between “protests” and “riots,” and know that some people are collapsing the two.

Protests give people an opportunity to take a stand and join with others so that they have one voice. Riots, on the other hand, involve damaging people and property.

Now is the time to ask yourself: How can I be part of the solution? 

 

    • Listen to what is being shared. Just listen.
    • Ask questions, don’t assume. Seek to understand what is needed.
    • Educate yourself so that you gain more confidence in your ability to move forward in this. 
    • Put yourself in someone else’s shoes, take a step back and ask: “What would have someone be/react that way?”  
    • Write your Legislators!
    • Call and let your local Police Department know your stance. 
    • Take a stand for something.

What we can’t do is ignore what’s happening or wait for someone else to provide the solution. 

This is only going to get resolved when everyone comes together! 

This is our world, our community, and we get to take a stand for what we believe in. 

Our stand is unity and love. 

We may not get it right, but we are not going to stay silent. 

How about you? 

You can watch the Love Chat with the Love Twins covering this topic HERE. Click to watch!

Below you will find some of the resources we have been reading and using to help us create a better understanding of how we can be part of the solution.