Let Go of the Wrong Man So You Can Attract the Right One

Let Go of the Wrong Man So You Can Attract the Right One

by | Sep 8, 2020 | Coaching, Dating, HDI Blog, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Self-Love, Success

rby Gladys Diaz 

Are you with the wrong guy? 

Are you in a relationship that feels like settling? 

Are you still hung up on a relationship that’s long been over, but you can’t seem to move on?

Are you frustrated feeling like you’re never going to be able to find the right person to bring into your life? 

The answers to these questions  are so important, because there is no way to create the relationship of your dreams if you’re stuck in something that’s not it. It can get tricky, because sometimes you may be open to seeing the red flags, and sometimes you’re not. 

So how do you know if you’re with the wrong guy? 

If you have clarity and know what you want to be experiencing in the relationship of your dreams, then you know when you’re not in it.

You must get crystal-clear on what it is that you want to feel and experience when you’re with the right guy in order to know when you’re with the wrong one.

Now, “crystal-clarity” isn’t the laundry list of what you want your guy to look like or have. It’s about the experience you have when you’re with him.

Do you feel at peace when you’re with him?
Can you be yourself?
Is the relationship aligned with your values and what’s important to you? 

When you know what you want – it becomes crystal clear if you’re in it or not.  It becomes less about looking for “red flags” and more about looking at what you’re actually experiencing when you’re around him, and then deciding if it’s aligned with what you really want. 

Why is this important? 

It’s important because, if you’re not having the experience you want to have in the relationship of your dreams, then the truth is:  You’re settling. 

We know why you stay. 

You think maybe he’ll come around.
You think maybe he’ll change.
Maybe… if you wait a little longer… love him a little more… give more of yourself to him…

If you find yourself in this pattern, listen up. Stop falling in love with “the potential” of what you think you see in a man, and start looking at what is actually there. Not from a judgmental place, but from a place of who he really is right now. 

We also know that if you’re willing to settle in a relationship, then you’re struggling with your self-worth and self-esteem. You’re not getting that you really do deserve to have exactly what you want in a loving relationship. 

When I was dating, this was me.

At one point, I was dating a man who was not only married, but was seeing three other women at the same time as me!

When I look back on that experience, I am dumbfounded as to what I was thinking, because, at the time, it didn’t even occur to me that maybe this wasn’t a good situation for me to be in. 

Years later, I know what I was thinking. I was continuing in my pattern of thinking if I could just be enough or do something right, that he’d choose me. I had fun with him, but the experience of being in what I thought was a relationship with him was super stressful. I was always wondering who he was with and whether he was going to call! It was not fun at all! 

It was not what I wanted, and this was blocking me from creating what I did want. 

The even bigger risk is that staying in a wrong relationship like the one I was in can have long-term effects on your psyche and your self-esteem, and the time it can take to heal from that can be devastating. 

Another aspect of being with the wrong guy is staying energetically connected to him, even after the relationship has ended. 

 The longest I’ve heard of a woman not being able to let go of a relationship is 17 years (that’s a teenager!)! 17 years of holding on to something that no longer existed and stopping herself from moving forward and creating the relationship she desired. 

 That’s heartbreaking! 

 So, what does it look like to let go? 

 First, you must bring acceptance to what is. You must realize that this relationship is not what you’re committed to creating and having, and accept that it needs to end.  If it already ended, you need to accept that it’s over, once and for all.

 Second, bring gratitude to the experience. Recognize the good memories, the lessons learned, and the people that may have come into your life through this person that are a blessing to you. When you feel gratitude for what was, it brings an empowerment to the choice you’re making to move on. 

 Third, you’ve got to realign yourself with your values. Your values are the compass you can use to guide your life. Though your boundaries and standards may change as the circumstances of your life change, your values – the things that matter to you most – will never change. Be true to and honor them, and you will always know you’re making the best choice for you.

 Fourth, do the Heartwork to understand how you got there in the first place. What are the core issues that drive the pattern of attracting the wrong man? Behind every dysfunctional pattern there’s a need you’re filling. Get clear on what that is so that you can shift it. 

 Fifth, begin taking committed action in the direction you’re now going. If you’re having a hard time letting go, make the choice to “lock the door” and move on! Take a stand, set boundaries and choose to move forward. 

 We know that a lot of this is “easier said than done” when you don’t know exactly how to do it on your own.  Think about it… If you knew what to do and how to do it, you would have moved on from this relationship a long time ago. 

If any or all of this sounds all too familiar,  we’d love to support you in finally letting go of the past, the wrong relationships, and anything that is holding you back from having the relationship of your dreams.

One of the fastest and most life-changing ways to do this is to join us at the Irresistible Woman LIVE virtual live event!

This 3-day, highly interactive, and transformational live virtual event for smart, successful women who want SUCCESS in love is one of the fastest and most effective ways to uncover what’s been getting in the way of you having the happy, loving, deeply connected relationship your heart desires!

 In these three days, you are going to get connected to who you truly are, experience transformations and breakthroughs in your relationship with yourself, break free from the past, and create the access for creating the relationship of your dreams!

 Whether you’re deeply desiring to attract the man or you want to create your dream relationship with the man you’re already with – this event is for you!

 Click HERE to grab your ticket NOW!

You’ll even get a special “LOVE  box” filled with cool swag and materials we’ll be using during the event IF you’re one of the first 100 people to grab your ticket.  

 Once the swag boxes are gone, they’re GONE, so don’t miss out on getting yours mailed to you before the event!

Click HERE to grab your ticket NOW!

How to Create Deep Connection in Relationships

How to Create Deep Connection in Relationships

by | Jul 17, 2020 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Forgiveness, Heart's Desire International, keeping the love alive, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice

by Gladys Diaz 

How deep is your connection with the people you’re in relationship with? 

Do you feel like you can be open, intimate and close with others, or do you feel like your relationships are superficial and shallow? 

As human beings, we long for connection with other people, but not just any connection. We crave deep intimacy. Relationships where we can speak freely and share our souls. 

The thing is, the depth you’ll be able to go with someone else can only be as deep as the depth you’re able to go with yourself.

If you’re able to connect with yourself on a deep level, you’ll be able to connect deeply with others and create the fulfilling, connected, deep relationship you desire. 

So what if you can’t? What if you feel stuck in a pattern that’s not working? 

A client of ours was feeling frustrated because, for the third time in a row she’d created a committed relationship with a man, only to then find out something about his character that she wasn’t okay with.

She was frustrated because she was wondering why she wasn’t seeing the things she needed to see in a man before allowing herself to fall in love and become attached to him. 

She wanted to heal whatever was underneath this pattern so she could 1) stop having to deal with the heartbreak of walking away from men she loved who weren’t what she wanted, and 2) so she could finally create a deep relationship with the right man. 

She was experiencing this because there was something within her that needed healing and she was attracting that in those she was dating. 

So how do you heal what’s getting in the way of the love you want? 

First, you must get some insight. Look into your experience of you. 

Now is the time to get real with yourself. Answer these questions, honestly: 

Are your actions out of alignment with your beliefs and values? 

Do you have a hard time setting healthy boundaries?

Do you waver on your word or struggle having integrity with what you say?

Do you avoid certain people, situations or conversations? 

Do you try to change who you are to appease others? 

Do you have a hard time trusting others?

Do you walk around in a state of protection? Always feeling that you’re unsafe?

Do you push people away before they can get close?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you most likely are disconnected in some area of your life, which will cause you to feel disconnected in areas of your relationships.

Look closely at your answers. 

Why do you behave the way you do? Where does it come from? 

If you’re in a relationship with someone right now and it feels like something is missing, look at it. Where is the connection missing? Get curious about it.

Open up in new ways to your partner. Look at what’s missing where you are and see what you can do to transform that barrier within yourself that will inspire change in the relationship. 

Once you’ve looked inward and seen where the breakdown is coming, from then you can heal it. 

You don’t overcome barriers. You heal them. 

You get to the source of where they came from — the moment you decided you couldn’t trust yourself, or whatever it is for you — and you do the Heartwork to heal it.

Now hear this:  You are not broken. Your heart may be broken, but you are not.
There may be a piece of you that is broken off, and that’s what you want to heal. 

Doing the Heartwork is about healing and bringing that piece back. 

Would you like support in healing the wounds you have?

Do you want to restore trust in yourself and others, have faith in love, let go of fears from the past and step into the relationship you desire – with yourself and others?

If so, we’d love to talk to you! Sometimes it takes someone else’s insight to see where we;re  blocked, and to learn how to do the work to heal it. 

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

When you heal, then you can be brave in life and love, because you’re open and ready to connect deeply and authentically within yourself and with others in relationship.

How to Communicate so He Can Actually Hear You

How to Communicate so He Can Actually Hear You

by | Jul 10, 2020 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, keeping the love alive, Love, Marriage, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice

by Gladys Diaz 

What do your conversations with your partner look and feel like? 

When you share what you want or feel with your partner, do you think you’re communicating effectively, but he n gets defensive or doesn’t understand what you’re really trying to say? 

Do you want to know how to communicate what you want and feel in a way that your partner can receive and hear it? 

Sometimes, learning how to communicate effectively in relationships can feel like you’re learning a whole new language. This is because we’ve been conditioned that “being honest” or “sharing how we feel” means we have to complain or say what we want in an ineffective way. 

For example, let’s say you feel like your partner doesn’t do enough around the house. You say things like, “It’d be nice if I could get some help around here!” or “I never get any help!” or “I always have to do everything myself.” 

And then… he doesn’t do anything different. 

You’re confused, because you think you expressed your needs and hoping your partner will feel motivated and inspired to help. 

But he isn’t.

This was going on in my relationship with Ric years ago, and it was frustrating! 

I felt like I was asking for help, but nothing was changing in his behavior. 

Why wasn’t he responding the way I wanted him to?!

The answer is because I wasn’t communicating effectively.  

One day I said distinctly, “I need help.” 

What was his response? 

“What do you need help with?” 

I honestly didn’t know what to say, because it never occurred to me that it could be that easy. 

No nagging… no complaining… just “I need help!”

And then he offered  to take on a few of the things I didn’t feel I could do alone. 

Wow! 

I got the result I wanted simply from changing the way I was communicating and being distinct and clear about what I wanted.

He wanted to help me, he just needed to be able to hear what I was saying without the “static” of complaints, reasons, and justifications for it. . 

When communicating what you want with your partner, make sure you use short, distinct comments that clearly state what you want. 

“I want to go for a walk.” 

“I’m disappointed because I was looking forward to seeing you.” 

“I don’t want to do these dishes right now.” 

Clearly stating what you want allows the other person to hear you. 

It really is that simple. 

Another important part of communicating effectively in a relationship is making sure your intention for the conversation is clear and that you let go of any attachment to how the other person may respond. 

Intention is the umbrella under which the conversation happens, and it’s the compass that guides it. 

Your reason for communicating can’t be about trying to get the other person to do or say something. It has to be 100% about saying what you want to say in order to stay in alignment with what is true for you, regardless of how he may react.

Be very careful with this ,because your ego will try and get in the way. 

Be honest with yourself and make sure your emotions are in a place where your pure intention is  to create what you want — love, peace and connection vs being right or getting an apology. 

If you’re not clear about what you want to say and why, postpone the conversation until you are. 

Ineffective communication is the #1 breakdown in relationships, and mastering how you can create the kind of relationship you want to create is the key to success. If you’d like support in seeing how you can create more clarity and impact through your communication, book a call with us now!

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Having clarity of intention, making sure your emotions are clear prior to the conversation, knowing what you want and don’t want, and letting go of attachment are the keys to having meaningful conversations that create deeper intimacy, connection and love in a relationship. 

Let us support you!

Is He Lacking Integrity? Are You?

Is He Lacking Integrity? Are You?

by | Jul 7, 2020 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice

by Gladys Diaz 

What is your definition of integrity? 

The universal answers that probably come to mind are,”Being honest,” or “Doing the right thing when nobody’s watching.”

Here’s our definition:“Honoring your word to the same level that you honor yourself.” 

This looks like following through with the things you say you’ll do – both to yourself and to others. 

This looks like honoring your personal thoughts and beliefs. 

This looks like knowing what you want and not settling for less. 

There was a time in my life when I didn’t really think about integrity. It just wasn’t something that mattered to me. I thought that being ten minutes late was still being on time. I justified my behavior and figured that if I didn’t follow through on things, people would understand. 

The thing is, I had no idea what I was doing to myself subconsciously.

The fact is, I was destroying my confidence regarding what I deserved. I was destroying the level of belief I had in myself about what I could create and accomplish.

Every time I took a job that paid less than what I wanted, I was diminishing  my personal integrity. 

Every time I called a guy I liked after I’d promised myself I’d wait to hear from him. I was showing that I didn’t believe I was worth being honest to. 

Every time I didn’t stick to a diet or exercise plan ,I was lowering my ability to trust myself.

I didn’t see that what I said mattered. 

The problem with this is that you can’t create a powerful life if you can’t trust yourself.

Every time I lowered my integrity, my life got more chaotic. 

And, finally I had a powerful wake-up call. 

“What if I started living my life by what I say matters?”

Guess what happened?

Well, when it comes to dating,I stopped tolerating certain things. If a guy said he’d call at a certain time and he didn’t, I noticed. If he did it time and time again I would choose to let him go. 

I stopped dating men that were separated, but still married. 

I raised my standards and stopped dating men who lied, did marijuana, and had lower standards than me. 

By raising my standards, I raised my awareness.

I realized that I could choose, and I started to choose differently. 

I started dating men who cared about integrity, too, and that made all the difference.

What if you were living your life like what you say matters? What might change?  

The #1 thing that improves self confidence is following through with the things you say you’ll do – both to others AND to yourself. 

Even the little things!

You can’t attract what you don’t create. You must start with yourself and have a look at your own level of integrity. 

When it comes to dating, you get to choose what you tolerate in a relationship – you get to decide!

We get it, sometimes emotions and attraction take over and we make concessions and accept behavior we don’t like. 

That’s why you need to be aware and awake.

Does he show up late or cancel 50% of the time? 

Does he treat you well both publicly and privately? 

Are you tolerating something you don’t want to have in a relationship?

These are just the beginning of the questions you can ask yourself to make sure you are creating or in the kind of  relationship you’d like to be in. 

And, if it appears that you’re in a relationship that lacks respect and integrity – look at yourself first. Be honest with yourself about whether or not you are respecting and being in integrity with yourself.

Don’t waste time and energy on things that don’t matter. Let him go.

Choose what you’ll tolerate.

Believe that you’re available to men who have and demonstrate integrity. 

There’s power in that.

If you’d like support diving into the questions that will bring you what you really desire in a relationship and what you may be tolerating to light, we’d love to speak with you!

Let us be the powerful wake-up call that supports you in creating the love and mutually respectful relationship you really want!

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Creating the life and relationship you want is always an internal job. If you’re attracting or in relationship with men that lie, don’t follow-through, or lack integrity in some other way – it’s time to take a look inward. We’re here to help you course-correct that so that you can experience the love and happiness your heart desires.

We’ve got you.

Do You Work On Your Relationship Every Day?

Do You Work On Your Relationship Every Day?

by | Jun 26, 2020 | breakups, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Love, Marriage, Success

by Gladys Diaz 

Is your relationship or relationship status something you think about every day? 
Not from a place of “desperation,” but from a place of commitment to having what you want?

Are your daily actions and choices aligned with creating the relationship of your dreams? 

Being in committed action about the things that are important to you creates confidence and is the path to manifesting what you want. 

So what choices can you make every day that will get you closer to creating the relationship your heart desires?  

Here are five choices you can make everyday to get you closer to creating the passionate, loving, fun relationship you really want.

  1. Be Crystal-Clear About What You Want. 

Without crystal-clarity, you get blurriness. In relationships, this looks like having bits and pieces of the kind of relationship you want to experience, but not quite having it ALL.  Each and every day, declare what the relationship of your dreams looks like and feels like. Don’t focus on  the qualities the man will possess or what he needs to have but what the two of you will create and experience together. 

If you want to experience happiness in the relationship, what does that look and feel like for you?

Do you want to laugh and smile together?

Are you going to be spontaneous and adventure together?

Get clear on what you truly  want and declare it daily.

2. Set Your Intention. 

Everyday, set an intention of what you are going to create and who you are going to be that day. Maybe you declare you’re going to “have fun and learn something new. Then, throughout the day make sure your actions align with that intention. 

BE and bring the fun! BE interested and interesting. 

Whether you’re going on a date, spending time with your partner, or just going about your normal day, you have the power to create and BE the experience you want to have. 

3. Start Smiling and Stop Complaining

This one isn’t just about smiling and not complaining. It’s about focusing your energy and attention on what you DO want to see and experience so that you are finding evidence of that all around you.  It’s about BEing the things you would like to see in a partner and attracting them to you. 

You attract who you are, so BE the love you want to see!. 

Everything we see is a projection of how we see ourselves. The more we become what we want, the more we will find it outside of ourselves. 

When you stand in this power you step into the power of creating, attracting and manifesting, instead of hoping, waiting or forcing things to happen. 

And that’s irresistible!

4. Experience and Express Gratitude.

In each moment that you see something beautiful or experience something you feel gratitude for, stop for a moment. 

Give yourself a few seconds to really feel the gratitude and love you’re experiencing. 

This is one of the most transformational practices you can begin implementing in your life!

Simply try it and see if you don’t start calling more goodness into your life! 

5. Choose your words wisely.

The words you say, both out loud and in your head, are very important, because your subconscious becomes a detective for the words you think and say. 

As soon as you say the words, “Dating is hard” or “I’m really trying in my relationship, but it’s just not working” your brain starts to look for evidence that you’re right. 

So… what do you want to be right about?

Change those words to “Dating is fun!” and “My relationship is growing stronger everyday,” and see how you and your love life begin to transform!

If you’d like some support in raising your self-awareness so that you can really start to understand how you can stop patterns that aren’t working for you and choose thoughts, words and actions that are aligned with your love vision, we’d love to talk to you!  Just click on the link below and schedule a Love Breakthrough Session.

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

This call will help you see what’s in the way, how to get it out of the way, and what your next best steps are for moving in the direction of life and love your heart desires.

It’s so easy to become apathetic in your life when things aren’t working out the way you would like, or if they are taking longer to become reality then you’d like them to. 

When you choose to take daily actions that are aligned with what you want, then God and the universe can’t help but start to deliver it to you! 

So, who are you going to BE today? What are you going to CHOOSE?

How To Get the Love RIGHT NOW!

How To Get the Love RIGHT NOW!

by | May 29, 2020 | Coaching, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance

by Gladys Diaz 

How long has it been since your last significant relationship?
And, if you’re in a relationship, how long has it been since you felt truly happy in it?

A month?
A year?
Several years?

This has been a recurring theme for women stepping in. For some it’s been two, five or seven years since their last relationship or since they felt truly happy in their relationships For some it’s been 12 or even 15 years! 

Oh, my heart just aches that it’s been that long since they’ve had that love and partnership they deserve and desire.

I’m so glad they found us! 

Let me ask you another question. 

How many times in the last 2 months have you heard the term, “stay at home,” “be careful,” or “stay safe.”
It’s only natural for you to be feeling the urge to push pause on your dreams. 

That’s why we feel called to say that the time to make your relationship dreams come true is RIGHT NO. 

Whether it’s been two months or two years or two decades since your last relationship, the time is now to create the relationship of your dreams – regardless of what the current situation says is possible. 

Life is still happening!  It may look a bit different right now, but life is still going on and there are things in your life that still get to be created during this time. 

Love is one of them! 

You can be careful and safe in order to protect your health and still be open to creating the relationship and love you desire. 

What you can’t be is frantic, fearful or closed off – because that will only have you attract more of the same. 

Even while you are staying at home, this is not the time to be isolated and alone. 

This is the time to be creating community as you work through the Love Barriers that are keeping you from experiencing the amazing desires you have in your heart. 

Now is the time to create the relationship of your dreams – with the right guidance. 

Unless you’re a professional baker, baking a cake probably wouldn’t be very much fun without a recipe or  guidance on how to do it, right? 

If you were just trying to figure it out, it would feel frustrating and probably wouldn’t turn out very good either!

Trying to create a relationship all on your own is the same. When you don’t know what to do, how to do it, and the best way to do it, it can be frustrating and “hard.”

Get the support you need so you can have fun with it!

The doors for our Ready For Love NOW program close tonight at midnight, so the time to join is now. 

This isn’t just a program.

This is a movement. 

There are 60 other women who have already stepped in. 60 women who have said yes to their lives, to themselves and to love!

I have such a strong feeling that these women are going to take this and spread it to other women in the world. They are stepping forward during a time when, from the outside, it looks like there is no hope, and they are reigniting the fire in their hearts! 

There is so much power in surrounding yourself with powerful women, thought leaders, and others who are working toward the same goals as you! 

So will you join us? 

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

(If there aren’t any slots available before midnight, that means other women grabbed the available spots.  Simply choose another time, and we’ll make sure we note that you reached out to us before midnight.)

This 12-week program is going to teach you how to break through the Love Barriers that are holding you back from creating the love you want. 

It’s going to support you in how to take care of yourself emotionally, physically and mentally so you can be the type of woman you could fall in love with! 

And most importantly, at the end of the 12 weeks, you’re going to walk away from this program being so completely in love with yourself that a man won’t be able to help but fall in love with you, too. (And you may even have found your man! – This has been known to happen during our programs, so we wouldn’t be surprised!)

What will it feel like to know you are worthy of love, to be open to love and to know  that you have the skills to create the love your heart desires? 

What will it feel like when you have found your man and get to bask in the love, passion, joy, and companionship you have waited for for so long? 

And, if you’re in a relationship, what will it feel like to know that you you know that you are loved and adored by the man that you love?

Well, it’s time to stop imagining and start making it happen! Let the waiting end now! 

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now