Today is a very special day at Heart’s Desire International Headquarters!
We are celebrating one of my FAVORITE love stories of all time!
Five years ago today, I was able to witness a dream-come-true for my sister, Michelle, as she walked down the aisle, escorted by her two sons to marry the love of her life, Arnie!
As I stood there, tears streaming down my face, I could not help but remember the pain and heartache that preceded this beautiful love story.
Michelle had experienced the pain of living in a marriage that had been falling apart for many years, a string of micro- and non-relationships to men who were unavailable, addicts, and who did not treat her with the love and tenderness she so longed for and deserved.
She came very close to giving up on love.
But, then a turning point happened and she discovered the secret to creating the kind of love-lasting, dream-making, extraordinary love she’d always wanted!
And it had nothing to do with Arnie!
See, Michelle discovered what had been missing all along. In fact this missing ingredient was what had her stay in an unhappy marriage for so long, attract and date the same kind of man time after painful time, and to wonder if there was something wrong with her.
In our book, 30 Days and 30 Ways to Fall In Love with YOU!, Michelle shares the secret:
I decided to take a deeper look into my relationship patterns so that I could begin to uncover what was at the source of the results I was producing.
I discovered that in the 5 years I had been dating, there was something fundamental missing in all of my dating and relationship experiences…ME! I had been trying to be the “perfect woman” to hide who I really was, because I was terrified that if a man discovered who I really was, he could never fall in love with me. I had convinced myself that the real me was unlovable.
I began to write down all the things about myself that I felt were unlovable…it was a long list! Then one by one, I began to forgive myself. I realized there was nothing I could do to change the past. All I could do now was learn the lessons and forget the details.
I gave myself permission to let it all go for good. As I let each one go, something beautiful began to happen – I began to fall in love with me!I discovered that the only love that was missing was my own. I was now free to love and to be loved!
See, what Michelle discovered is that what stops you from creating a happy and loving relationship you want is not online dating; it’s not what happened in your past; and it’s not your current partner, your ex, or the guy who didn’t love you back.
The #1 difference between the woman who is not experiencing love and happiness in her relationships and the one who IS comes down to the relationship the woman has with herself.
Period.
If you do not love, accept, and honor yourself, it will be impossible for you to attract someone into your life who will love, accept, and honor you!
In fact, it’s unfair to expect a man to love you – really love you – if you don’t truly love yourself.
And what happens is probably what you’ve been experiencing over and over again:
You keep attracting men who you hope will love and accept you.
You twist yourself into a pretzel trying to become the woman you think he might – maybe – choose to love.
Then lose yourself in the relationship, forgetting about your own needs and desires, in the hopes that you will finally feel loved.
If this is resonating with you, you’re not alone.
This happens to be the most common complaint women have about what happens when they are in a relationship.
And the reason this happens again and again is because, on a fundamental level, you do not feel that you are worthy of the kind of love you want and deserve.
So you settle.
You settle for less than what you really want.
You try to convince yourself that what you have is what you want.
And, at the end of yet another heartbreaking relationship, you’re left feeling lost, empty, lonely, and afraid – wondering if you’ll ever really have the love and happiness your heart desires.
The best part about it is we’re starting tomorrow – February 13th, the day before Valentine’s Day – which means you won’t be alone on Valentine’s Day, you’ll be having fun, AND you’re going to experience what it’s like to feel truly loved by the person with whom you’ll have the longest relationship of your life: YOU!
So, hurry up!
Join The Self-Love Secretnow, and take the first step toward creating the love affair of a lifetime!
By the way, the book 30 Days and 30 Ways to Fall In Love with YOU! is only one of the 6 features you get in The Self-Love Secret Bundle, including a members-only Facebook page where you will receive daily self-love missions, get coaching and support, share your self-love victories!
CLICK HEREnow and begin your 21-day journey to attracting the love of your life today!
Well, you’d have to be blind not to see the signs, because they’re everywhere!
All you have to do is walk into a store and you’re bombarded by the overwhelming amount of pink, red, and chocolate to know that this means Valentine’s Day is almost here!
For many women – both single and in relationships, alike – this can be difficult holiday right on the heels of Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, and New Year’s Eve!
Unlike the other holidays, however, this one is specifically about love and relationships, and it can be heartbreaking if you’re not in a happy, loving relationship of your own.
I get it and I’m not going to try to minimize it, because I know it hurts.
However, I certainly don’t want you feeling sad or like you want to avoid thinking about love and relationships for the next several days!
It’s okay to want to be in a relationship.
It’s okay to feel sad if you’re not in one.
What’s notokay is thinking that it’s impossible for things to change for you!
It’s also not okay to think that there is something wrong you because you’re not in a relationship yet!
There are ways to begin shifting your feelings from hopeless to hope-full and from lonely to loved!
The key to creating this shift is to begin a new love affair!
Not with a man, but with yourself!
That’s because falling in love with YOU is the secret sauce for attracting true love!
Think about it!
What would it be like if for the next 21 days all you did was speak loving words to yourself?
What if for the next 21 days, you sent yourself a love or gratitude note for something you truly admire or are grateful for about YOU?
What if for the next 21 days your top priority was doing at least one thing that you find fun, peaceful, and fulfilling?
How might that change the way you see yourself?
How might that change the way others see you?
And, quite frankly, how FUN would that be?!?
If you’re up for a Self-Love Challenge, then you’re in the right place, because we have prepared a 21-day SELF-LOVE FEST especially for YOU!
When you join us for The Self-Love Secret, you will learn:
The ways you are stopping yourself from having a happy, fulfilling and loving relationship (and how it has nothing to do with the man you’re with!)
The exact steps you can take to stop self-sabotaging your happiness and relationships so that you can start attracting more love into your life
Real and practical ways to become simply irresistible and draw in the extraordinary levels of love and happiness you want and deserve
Here’s what you get in the Self-Love Secret Bundle:
Our eBook 30 Days and 30 Ways to Fall In Love with YOU!: A 30-Day Journey to Discovering Self-Love
Members-only access to the teleclass “The Self-Love Secret: How Falling In Love with YOU is the Key to Attracting the Love You Want!”
An MP3 recording of the teleclass so that you can download and have it whenever you want or need to listen to it
21 Daily Self-Love Challenges to inspire you in your self-love affair
A Private Facebook Group where you can receive coaching, connect with us, and share posts and pics of yourself completing your daily self-love challenges
A 30-minute Private Love Breakthrough Call so that you can continue your self-love journey beyond the 21 days and manifest the love your heart desires
All together this is a $417 value!
But, you can get it today at our Valentine’s Day Special Price of $47!!!
Here’s the deal:
You can’t expect someone else to fall madly and deeply in love with you if you’re not willing to dedicate 21 days to falling in love with you!
BE the love you want to see and join us for 21 days of fun, life-changing breakthroughs, and more LOVE than you ever imagined was possible!
We already have several women signed up and the journey begins this weekend, so make sure click on the link below and join us now!
It’s hard to believe that we’re already in February. If you’re like me, January went by in a blur. As I was meditating yesterday, I took a look at the goals and intentions I set for this year to hold myself accountable.
There are some goals I am right on-point with. I’ve stuck to my action plan and I feel very proud of myself for moving beyond my comfort zone and sticking to the promises I’ve made to myself.
There are a few, however, where I had to be real with myself.
How intentional have I been about taking an action step every day in the direction of meeting this goal?
Where did I allow my fears and doubts to get in the way?
Am I going to quit or recommit?
That last question is the most powerful one.
Why?
Because too often, the reason people do not hit their goals is because they quit – sometimes just centimeters from the finish line they can’t see because their fears, doubts, and limiting beliefs are so much bigger than the faith they have in themselves to actually have what they say they want.
Chances are that if you didn’t bother to set any goals or intentions for 2016, it’s because you have doubt.
You either doubt that you can have what you want, or you doubt that you can do what it takes to achieve it. More than likely, it’s a combination of both.
Self-doubt is what has you not put your heart out there.
You doubt your ability to be able to attract the kind of man you want.
You doubt that you can actually have the kind of relationship you want.
And, if you’re 100% honest with yourself, you doubt this because you either think that what you want is “unrealistic” or “too good to be true.”
That’s just another way of hiding the fact that you doubt that you’re worth having that kind of love.
If you’re in a relationship, you pretend that everything is okay, even though your heart is breaking and things haven’t been remotely close to okay in a long time.
You keep holding onto a broken relationship, not doing anything to change it or yourself for fear that any changes you try to make won’t work.
It’s easier to ignore what’s not working, to keep wishing things (especially him) will change on their own.
Again, this goes back to doubting your ability to have the kind of relationship your heart truly desires.
Staying stuck in the same rut is only going to give you the same results.
Things only change when you make a change.
That’s it. There’s no magic bullet, no secret formula.
If you want to have a different experience and different results in your love life, you need to trust that there IS a way for you to have the love and happiness you want.
Now, I get that you may not know how to do that.
If you did, chances are you probably would have made the changes already, right?
Well, that’s when you need to choose: Do I quit or recommit?
If you’re ready to recommit to yourself and your desire to have a happy, loving, intimate relationship where you get to feel loved and cherished, accepted and adored for the amazing woman you are, then it’s time to recommit to YOU!
And if you’re unsure of how to do that, which steps to take first, and you’d like some support, click the link below to schedule time to talk.
Doing nothing is going to give you the same results you have right now.
Choosing to recommit to yourself, your relationship goals and the love your heart desires is how you can make sure that 2016 is the year of making your relationship dreams come true!
By the way… If the little voice of doubt in your head is saying things like, “Why bother?” or “What’s the point?” I want to challenge you to move beyond the safety of listening to that voice — the one that’s kept you stuck right where you are — and click the link below! This is the first step in your love breakthrough!
There are few things more painful than losing someone you love, whether that’s due to a breakup, divorce, death, or because the person you love does not feel the same way about you.
Experiencing a loss of any kind can trigger different emotions and beliefs that can leave you feeling hurt, insecure, disempowered, and as if you are unable to move forward in your love life.
Which of these ring true for you?
You meet and date men, but they never quite match up to “the one who got away”
You still think about what you could have done/could do to work things out with him
You constantly talk about and bring him up when speaking with friends
You cyber-stalk or try to find out information about him and his life via social media and/or friends and family
You make yourself available to see and/or talk to him in the hopes that you will reconcile
You’ve agreed to a “friends-with-benefits” relationship with him in the hopes that he will come back to you
If any of these scenarios ring true for you, consider that you are not over the man in your past.
Of course it takes time to get over a breakup. However, if it’s been more than a few months and you’re still pining over him, avoiding/resisting meeting someone else because you are still hoping and waiting that he’ll come back to you, or you find something wrong with every single man you meet, you’re actually stopping yourself from moving forward. If what you really want is a happy, loving relationship with a man who you love and who loves you back, holding onto a previous man or relationship actually blocks you from welcoming new love into your life.
There are many reasons you may be doing this, and one of the main reasons is that staying stuck in the past – as painful and unpleasant as it may feel at times – gives you a false sense of being “safe.” Safe from what?
Holding onto the past keeps you safe from –
being vulnerable and putting your heart back out there
admitting that perhaps he really wasn’t the right guy for you
risking more heartache
This false sense of safety is why we see so many women who months, years, and, yes, even decades, later, are still wondering why they can’t meet a good man, questioning what’s wrong with them, wondering whether they are meant to be happy in a relationship, and believing the lie that – for whatever reason – they are destined to not experience the joy of loving and being loved. Nothing could be further from the truth! However, as scary as it can feel, you have to be courageous enough to let go of the past so that you can open your hand and receive the love that is already waiting for you. How do you do that?
Realize that, while you may still love him, you need to love yourself even more.
Be willing to accept that the relationship is over.
Be committed to removing the love barriers that are blocking love from coming into your life so that you can experience the love, joy, and intimacy you truly desire.
If you’ve been holding onto a past relationship and you’re ready to take these steps – even if you’re scared or unsure of how to do it – click below to schedule time to talk with one of us. Click here to schedule time to talk!
We can help you identify what is standing in your way and outline some clear steps you can take to release the past and welcome in the love that you desire and deserve! You’re not alone! We’re here to help you get to the other side of heartache and experience the love that is already waiting there for you!
You deserve to be happy, to love and be loved, and to feel like the beautiful, lovable woman you are. And, while it may feel scary to let go, you don’t have to do it alone. We’re here to support you!
Like many holidays and celebrations, New Year’s Eve can trigger bitter-sweet feelings.
On one hand, it can be disheartening if you’ve gotten to the end of the year without having attained all of the goals you’d set for yourself 12 months ago. This can be particularly true if you are not in the happy, loving relationship you dream of.
On the other hand, it can be exciting and uplifting to know that you have a whole new year ahead of you filled with unlimited possibilities – with one of those real possibilities being to finally have the loving relationship your heart desires.
So, how do we reconcile the disheartening thoughts with the uplifting ones?
You can do it in 3 easy steps!
Breathe. If you’re like most women, you can be pretty hard on yourself. Many times, this is most evident in the things you tell yourself about yourself. If you’ve been putting yourself down, thinking that there must be something “wrong” with you because you haven’t manifested the love you want yet, take a deep breath and allow the love that surrounds you (and, yes, it’s always all around you and within you) to enter into your heart.
If you still don’t feel the love that surrounds you within you,
Breathe again…
Keep inhaling until you can fill your lungs anymore.
Hold it 3 seconds and envision the love filling every part of your being.
Allow love to fill you.
Do this as many times as you need to until you literally and physically feel love filling your being.
Once you are able to feel the love within you…
Release. As you exhale, release all of those negative thoughts, beliefs and toxic emotions that do not serve you. Breathe out all of the pain, sadness, and feelings of dissatisfaction. Release yourself from the hold that those disempowering thoughts create in your life. Those are the thoughts that keep you holding onto dead-end relationships, stop you from moving on, and keep you repeating dysfunctional patterns in relationships.
If you are having trouble releasing yourself from the negative thoughts, beliefs and emotions,
Go back to Step #1, Breathe, and do 2 or 3 more loving breaths.
On each exhale, envision yourself releasing all of the pain, sadness, and disempowering thoughts and emotions from your body.
With each exhalation, you are releasing what doesn’t work and allowing more love to enter you on the inhalation.
It’s okay if you feel like crying. As you do the exercise, the sad tears will turn to tears of gratitude as you allow love to enter, surround, and fill you up!
Once you feel you have released the disempowering thoughts and emotions…
Renew. In this new space, where love is what you are present to, renew your commitment to yourself to create the loving, happy, fulfilling relationship your heart desires. Commit to doing whatever it takes to transform the thoughts, words, and behaviors that have stopped you from experiencing the love you desire and deserve.
Commitment without action is nothing but wishful thinking. This is why so many people get to the end of a year without having reached the goals and dreams they declared at the beginning of the year. It’s only when you are taking consistent action in the direction of your goals and dreams that you are able to manifest them! So, to ensure that 2016 is actually different for you and you are experiencing the love your heart truly desires, follow these steps:
Identify the person/people who can teach and help you to create and experience the loving romantic relationship you want. A happily married relationship coach who can teach you the skills that will have you attract, create, and nurture a healthy romantic relationship is the best option. And, with us, you get two coaches for the price of one! 🙂
With your coach, identify 1-3 action steps you will take to create renewal in your love life.
Commit to fulfilling on those actions steps no matter what.
The reason most people do not reach their goals and manifest their dreams is because they quit. They quit on their dreams, in doing so, they give up on themselves.
This is why working with a coach is so important. You have built-in accountability.
Why?
Because, left to your own devices, you will do what you you’ve always done. You’ll do what’s comfortable, what you’re familiar with, and those are the same things that have given you the results you have now.
I’m not being negative here. This is what we all do. The results we have are consistent with the actions we’ve taken and those actions are consistent with what we’ve been committed to.
So, if you’re ready to make 2016 THE YEAR of love, intimacy, and romance for yourself, first BREATH, RELEASE, and RENEW.
Then make a real commitment to yourself to do whatever it takesto manifest the love you want.
Have your first action step be to schedule a call with one of us to help you identify your 1-3 action steps that will lead you in the direction of the relationship of your dreams!
We promise we’ll do whatever it takes to support and guide you in making your relationship dream come true.
We will stand for you, hold you accountable, and be there when you need someone to remind you just how worthy you are of having the love your heart desires!
Creating the love you want does not have to be “hard.” It can be easy when you have the right guidance and know exactly which steps to take to create the loving, happy, fulfilling relationship you desire and deserve.
Lately, we’ve been answering your questions about what to say or do when your man says or does something that leaves you, well… speechless!
In today’s video, I talk about three ineffective ways to respond to an emotional trigger and what you can do instead.
The goal? To have a conversation where you can share and express what you want to say, where you are left feeling heard, and where the conversation leads to a win-win solution!
Have questions of your own? Put them in the comments section and we’ll answer them right away!
Or… even better… join us for the What to Say to Your Man Masterclasson Saturday, December 19th, and jump into our Facebook group that is already live!
Being able to communicate effectively is one of the keys to having a great relationship! Watch the video and let us know what questions you’d like answered!
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