Heart's Desire Intl

How to Listen to Actually Hear Your Partners

by heartsdesireintl | Aug 17, 2020 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Love, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance

by Gladys Diaz

Let’s talk about listening.

It’s been said that listening is 50% of the communication process.

Well, we think differently!

Listening is 100% of communication because, if you’re not actively listening, you’re not really having a conversation.

If you’re not listening you’re having a monologue, instead of a dialogue, and that isn’t really a conversation, now, is it?

We’re talking about not just listening, but really hearing what the other person is saying.

Have you ever had this experience of listening vs. hearing?

Think about a clock that ticks in your house. Probably, most of the time you don’t even notice the ticking, or you might hear it and it doesn’t really affect you. Now think about how you feel when you tune into it and all of the sudden the ticking becomes 10 times louder and drives you absolutely crazy!

It’s maddening right?!

Kind of a silly example, but do you see the difference between listening and actually hearing?

Hearing involves attention and presence, and is so very important in dating and relationships.

If you’re dating, you’re aiming to get to know people well enough to know if you want to keep getting to know them. How do you do that if you’re not listening well?

Really listening can help you catch key things you may otherwise have missed that can cause you to either want to get to know someone better, or save you lots of heartache and wasted time in the long run.

If you’re in a relationship, one of the most loving things you can do for your partner is to simply listen without saying a word.

How often do you do that?

We get it,. It’s not always easy. As mothers and wives we get how easy it is to give in to the desire to say something from a desire to support and help the other person.

However, when someone feels heard, they feel acknowledged, loved, cared for, seen, known and understood.

And those are beautiful gifts to receive!

So, how do you listen so you actually hear the other person?

It starts with being in control of the voice in your head. You know, the voice that is constantly thinking about, judging and placing opinions on everything you hear.

That voice that just asked if you have one of those voices… Yep, that’s the one!

Acknowledge you have that voice so you can start turning the volume down on it and really listening when others are talking.

The next step is to be an active listener.

What does that mean?

Engage with the conversation. Ask questions and seek to understand. Refrain from interrupting and interjecting your own thoughts and opinions, but let the other person know you’re listening by showing you’re invested in the conversation.

You can also say periodically things like, “I want to make sure I’m hearing you….” or “What I’m hearing you say is…” so that you can make sure you are understanding what they are trying to communicate.

The experience on the receiving end of these questions is one of “Wow! She really cares about me and wants to make sure she understands me!”

If you want to show a lot of courage, you could also ask at the end of a conversation how the other person felt about your listening. And then listen for the feedback of what the other person’s experience was.

You can become a better listener just by asking for feedback along the way!

In communication, the words you say, how you say them, and how you listen are the keys to making a difference for people in your life.
These tools work across the board. How would your relationships in all walks of life — work, family, friendships — benefit from better listening?

If you’d like some support with recognizing the blocks in your own listening patterns, that’s what we’re here for! We know the tools of communication that work in relationships — AND the ones that don’t — so that you can experience greater levels of love, trust and intimacy with those you love and care about.

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Think of the number of people in your life who are important to you and how communicating better would make a difference for them. Think about how this could transform the communication and connection in your relationships.

It’s a complete game changer when you know how to use the tools! We want you to go out in your life and have beautiful conversations that make a difference for you and the person you love!

How To Get the Love RIGHT NOW!

by heartsdesireintl | May 29, 2020 | Coaching, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance

by Gladys Diaz

How long has it been since your last significant relationship?
And, if you’re in a relationship, how long has it been since you felt truly happy in it?

A month?
A year?
Several years?

This has been a recurring theme for women stepping in. For some it’s been two, five or seven years since their last relationship or since they felt truly happy in their relationships For some it’s been 12 or even 15 years!

Oh, my heart just aches that it’s been that long since they’ve had that love and partnership they deserve and desire.

I’m so glad they found us!

Let me ask you another question.

How many times in the last 2 months have you heard the term, “stay at home,” “be careful,” or “stay safe.”
It’s only natural for you to be feeling the urge to push pause on your dreams.

That’s why we feel called to say that the time to make your relationship dreams come true is RIGHT NO.

Whether it’s been two months or two years or two decades since your last relationship, the time is now to create the relationship of your dreams – regardless of what the current situation says is possible.

Life is still happening! It may look a bit different right now, but life is still going on and there are things in your life that still get to be created during this time.

Love is one of them!

You can be careful and safe in order to protect your health and still be open to creating the relationship and love you desire.

What you can’t be is frantic, fearful or closed off – because that will only have you attract more of the same.

Even while you are staying at home, this is not the time to be isolated and alone.

This is the time to be creating community as you work through the Love Barriers that are keeping you from experiencing the amazing desires you have in your heart.

Now is the time to create the relationship of your dreams – with the right guidance.

Unless you’re a professional baker, baking a cake probably wouldn’t be very much fun without a recipe or guidance on how to do it, right?

If you were just trying to figure it out, it would feel frustrating and probably wouldn’t turn out very good either!

Trying to create a relationship all on your own is the same. When you don’t know what to do, how to do it, and the best way to do it, it can be frustrating and “hard.”

Get the support you need so you can have fun with it!

The doors for our Ready For Love NOW program close tonight at midnight, so the time to join is now.

This isn’t just a program.

This is a movement.

There are 60 other women who have already stepped in. 60 women who have said yes to their lives, to themselves and to love!

I have such a strong feeling that these women are going to take this and spread it to other women in the world. They are stepping forward during a time when, from the outside, it looks like there is no hope, and they are reigniting the fire in their hearts!

There is so much power in surrounding yourself with powerful women, thought leaders, and others who are working toward the same goals as you!

So will you join us?

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

(If there aren’t any slots available before midnight, that means other women grabbed the available spots. Simply choose another time, and we’ll make sure we note that you reached out to us before midnight.)

This 12-week program is going to teach you how to break through the Love Barriers that are holding you back from creating the love you want.

It’s going to support you in how to take care of yourself emotionally, physically and mentally so you can be the type of woman you could fall in love with!

And most importantly, at the end of the 12 weeks, you’re going to walk away from this program being so completely in love with yourself that a man won’t be able to help but fall in love with you, too. (And you may even have found your man! – This has been known to happen during our programs, so we wouldn’t be surprised!)

What will it feel like to know you are worthy of love, to be open to love and to know that you have the skills to create the love your heart desires?

What will it feel like when you have found your man and get to bask in the love, passion, joy, and companionship you have waited for for so long?

And, if you’re in a relationship, what will it feel like to know that you you know that you are loved and adored by the man that you love?

Well, it’s time to stop imagining and start making it happen! Let the waiting end now!

Book a Love Breakthrough Session Now

Not Feeling Attracted To Anyone??

by heartsdesireintl | Nov 22, 2019 | breakups, Coaching, Dating, Forgiveness, HDI Blog, Heart's Desire International, heartache, Love, Ready to Love Again, Romance

by Gladys Diaz

Do you have a relationship from the past that you haven’t fully let go of?

Is there someone that is still holding a piece of your heart?

Maybe it wasn’t even a recent break-up, maybe it’s been two years, three years or even ten years ago, and it’s still blocking you from moving forward in love.

If this is you, we hear you! It can be so frustrating when you want to run freely forward without anything from the past holding you back, but just seem to be stuck.

If this is you, we know that you want to get unstuck (otherwise, you wouldn’t be reading this right now), but you just don’t know how.

The first step in letting someone from the past go is understanding how holding onto that person and relationship is impacting you now, in the present. Whenever there’s something from the past that’s still in your space, it won’t allow you to move forward.

And how else is it impacting you?

To uncover the impact the past is still having on you, first look at your results.

What are you currently experiencing?

Are you going on dates or are you holding back?

If you are going on dates, are you enjoying the process?

Look at your last couple of dates. Are there patterns that are presenting themselves?

Is there something wrong with every single person you go out with?

Are you not attracted to anyone?

Do you feel disconnected, and, immediately during or after every date,feel like he’s definitely not the one?

No, you’re not going to be attracted to or want to date every single person you meet. It’s natural to not be interested in every single man you go on a date with. But, if it seems you aren’t feeling it for anyone then you may be holding onto someone from the past.

Recently a client expressed frustration with this very thing. She said that while she’s dating, she finds herself comparing every single guy to her ex. She said he was the best boyfriend and that it was the best relationship she’d ever had. I lovingly pointed out to her that it couldn’t have been “the best,” because they’re not together anymore, and that there was a reason for that. There’s a reason that it didn’t work out, and as long as she keeps romanticizing this past relationship and putting that man on a pedestal, she will never have space for the right man — the one who really will be the best!

Sound familiar?

If you find yourself having this experience, it’s time to get curious.

Ask yourself,

What’s really going on here?

Why am I not feeling connection?

Why am I never attracted to anyone?

What’s really holding me back?

Get curious

You will start to discover your blind spots by saying, “I wonder…”

“I wonder if I’m still holding onto the past?”

“I wonder why I can’t let go?”

“I wonder what that person represents for me?”

“I wonder if I’m afraid to move on?”

When it comes to breakups, it would be weird if you didn’t miss someone that you once spent time with, and it’s normal to take time to grieve. However, sometimes we think that the longer we grieve or the more time we stay stuck, the more validation we give to the relationship. But, how much more time do you want to waste staying safe and alone?

It’s okay to love someone and let them go.

Letting someone go does not invalidate the love you shared with him, the memories you created together, who he is as a person, or the lessons the relationship taught you.

And, just because you shared an incredible love once, doesn’t mean you can never find it (or something even MORE incredible) again.

When I lost my first husband and then found Ric, I realized that there’s more than just one “The One.” There are multiple people on this planet that can make you happy and love you forever!

But only if you are open to it.

Only if you are willing to do the HeartWork to bring the past to a close, release it from your mind AND your heart, and open the door to welcome the new love that’s already waiting for you.

I promise you, there’s a love out there that’s even bigger and better than that person from the past. Someone even bigger and better than you can even imagine. And someone who wants to spend his life with you!

Because of this, Michelle and I would love for you to join us for our 2020 Love Vision Event, happening in just a few weeks!

Click here to say good-bye to the past and create a new and lasting love!

At this event, we’ll be helping you to complete 2019 and step powerfully into 2020 with a crystal-clear vision for love that your heart deeply desires.

We’ll show you the exact steps and tools you’ll need to create and experience that love right now!

The process we’ll be taking you through is hands-on, experiential, and transformative.

We’re going to help you create your Love Vision, teach you HOW to actually live into it so you can create it in real life in 2020!

The absolute truth is that in order to open up to a new chapter, you have to complete the past. You take what worked and what didn’t work about that past relationship, release your attachment to the person, take whatever serves you into the future, and let go of everything else.

It’s time for you to let go of the past and open up to the love that is already waiting for you.

Click here to create the love you want in 2020!

How To Be Absolutely Irresistible To A Man.

by heartsdesireintl | Nov 15, 2019 | Coaching, Dating, Getting engaged, Heart's Desire International, keeping the love alive, Love, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance, Success

by Gladys Diaz

Do you know that girl that just seems to get all the guys?

You know… that girlfriend that always seems to get people’s attention… no matter where she is??

What is it about her?

What if we told you the secret to turning a man on?

What if we gave you the tools that would have men not just BE attracted to you, but STAY attracted to you.

What if we told you exactly how to have men ask you out on the spot?

Keep reading, because what we’re about to share with you has had men turn around their cars around and PARK, or leave their seat in a restaurant to ask a girl out in the parking lot! (True stories!).

See, there’s a limiting belief many women have that men only want one thing. (I’m sure you can guess what that one thing is.)

But, guess what?! It’s not true!

Research shows that there is something that men want, something they notice right away in a woman, before they ever speak to her, and that is if she looks like she feels happy and confident.

Men notice and are attracted to a woman’s eyes and her smile before anything else..

Why?

A woman’s’ eyes reveal whether or not she feels confident.

Are you able to see a man you find attractive and make eye contact with him?

Are you able to then hold that contact?

If so, a man knows you are confident.

A woman’s smile let’s a man know how she feels. Is she happy? Does she look like she can create her own happiness, and is she enjoying her life?

Those two things are what turns a man on and makes him not only notice you, but want to do something about it.

And, for those of you already in relationships, trust us when we tell you that your eyes and your smile STILL turn your boyfriend or husband on.

Doubt us? Try it! Smile at him and hold eye contact for 3-5 seconds as you do. Then let us know how he responds! 😉

So what are the ways of BEing you can cultivate inside yourself so that your eyes shine with confidence and your smile radiates happiness?

We call them the Irresistible Essences — your innate power to create that magical spark that naturally draws men (and everyone else, for that matter) to you.

We use the word MAGICAL to help you remember what they are:

M – Mesmerizing

A – Authentic

G – Gracious

I – Inspiring

C – Confident

A – Alluring

L – Love-able

Let’s dive in a bit deeper, shall we?

BEing Mesmerizing looks like captivating a man’s attention and drawing him into you through your Way of BEing. It’s like casting a spell that has men notice and be drawn to you.

BEing Authentic means being YOURSELF. It’s knowing that you’re more than enough and showing up that way. Remember: He can’t fall (or stay) in love with you if you’re not even there!

BEing Gracious is allowing yourself to receive and giving him the gift of being able to give to you. Some women really struggle with this one, because they’re so used to doing for themselves. It’s important to point out that receiving is NOT about being entitled or not being able to take care of yourself. It’s about graciously accepting that he’s invited you out and receiving that with grace and gratitude..

So, allow him to pay. Accept his compliments. And offer gratitude in return. Let him know how much you appreciated the dinner, his company, and the date.

BEing Inspiring means being a breath of happiness, love and fun. No one wants to swim in a pool of upset. So instead of making him feel obligated to be with you or required to do anything, inspire him to show up for you by the way you are when you’re around him.

BEing Confident looks like doing your own thing and creating your own happiness. It’s knowing that you’re enough without feeling as if you have to “prove” it. Remember: This is the #1 most attractive thing to a man.

BEing Alluring is also a Way of BEing. It means being radiant, authentic, drawing people to you simply by being the amazing woman you are.

BEing Love-Able means knowing deep down, for real, that you are both able to love and be loved by another. It looks like knowing you don’t have to withhold love or be afraid to receive it.

So there you have it! The 7 ways of BEing, the Irresistible Essences, that turn a man on and attract him to want to get to know you and then want to stay with you!

If you want to dive into this even further so that you can create the relationship of your dreams NOW, then you will want to join us for our 2020 Love Vision Event, happening in just a few weeks!

Click here to learn more.

At this event, we’ll be helping you to complete 2019 and step powerfully into 2020 with a crystal-clear vision for love that your heart desires deeply and the exact steps and tools you’ll need to create and experience it in 2020! There are limited spots at this event and they are already filling up, so make sure to claim your spot now.

Remember: It’s not just about getting a man to ask you out. It’s about BEing the irresistible woman that he decides he can’t live without. That’s when all your dreams will become a reality!

Are You Ready To Trust?

by heartsdesireintl | Oct 5, 2019 | Coaching, Dating, Forgiveness, Intimacy, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Romance

by Gladys Diaz

Do you feel like your intuition is broken?

Do you feel like you don’t know what’s best, or how to make the right decisions?

Do you feel like you can’t trust men? Your friends? Yourself?

That last one’s important, because… if you can’t trust yourself, how are you ever going to be able to trust anyone else?

The other day I was talking to a woman, and, as we were talking, the issue of trust just kept coming up. Finally, I asked, “How many times have you experienced someone cheating on you?” Her answer shocked me for someone for her age. It was over 5 times! As we continued talking, we discovered that the issue of infidelity was something that had been in her family for years. – Of course she has a hard time trusting men!

As women, our biggest need is to feel safe. How can we feel safe with others when we feel we can’t trust the person we’re with?

I was there, too. Because of the alcohol abuse, abandonment, and pretending that I engaged in during in my childhood to hide what was going on in our home from everyone around me, I had trouble trusting people. My thought was, “If I can’t trust my own mother, how am I ever going to trust anyone else, or even myself.

Because of that limiting belief, I wasn’t making the best decisions about who I was allowing into my life, and I kept attracting the wrong guys. I was dating terrible men – mean men who didn’t love, honor, or respect me.

When I started to do my HeartWork, I forgave my mom, my ex-boyfriends, and myself for the choices we had all made. Not long after that, I met Ric. He was so authentic! His honesty was something I found super-attractive. I took my time getting to know him, saw that I could trust myself to choose a good man, and the rest is history! How grateful I am that I learned how to trust??? Very!

Here’s the thing… if you’re feeling like you don’t trust others – especially men – then y consider that you don’t trust yourself.

So…How do you shift that?

Here’s the formula that Michelle and I use with our clients to help them know whether it’s their intuition that’s guiding them or if it’s their fears, limiting beliefs, and superstitions doing the talking.

It’s simple.

If it’s your intuition, then there is evidence of it around you.

If it’s your fears, limiting beliefs, and superstitions then you’re making up the evidence.

What if you can’t tell the difference?

Give yourself some space. Detach from the situation a little bit so that you can see what’s actually happening and what’s not happening.

Take a look and see if maybe you’re making something up that’s not actually happening in reality?

Is a memory being triggered?

Are you choosing to ignore something that is happening?

Are you crossing and not honoring your own boundaries for someone else?

When you take a step back and look at it with new eyes, I promise you you’ll be able to hear what your intuition is telling you!

And then you get to trust it and yourself to make the choice that’s right for you!

If you’re having a lot of trouble trusting others and don’t know where to start, start by forgiving yourself for the choices you’ve made in the past and give yourself permission to move on! Because the time is now.

There are 88 days left in 2019.

Eighty-eight!

Are you living the Love Resolution you made at the beginning of the year?

Are you where you want to be on December 31^st, or is there a gap?

If you’re not there yet, the good news is that THERE ARE STILL 88 days to create a real shift!

We have a client who just got a promise ring from her man, and another that is getting married next week! There is still time for YOU to create the love of your dreams in 2019.

If you’re not sure where to start, click here to schedule a complimentary call with us about The Ready to Love Again Program, a 12-month coaching program for single women who want to attract the right man and create the relationship of their dreams (enrollment closes October 8^th, so don’t wait!):

Trust yourself and book a Love Breakthrough Session here!

Just a quick note: the only way to reserve a spot in the program is to chat with us, so that together, we can determine whether it’s a good fit for you, right now.

You get to create that love for yourself and what better time than right now?

Love Hack: How to Get More Time and Attention From Your Man!

by heartsdesireintl | Mar 5, 2018 | Communication, Dating, Intimacy, Love, Marriage, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Romance

by Gladys Diaz

Quick question:

Do you find yourself thinking about how your man isn’t giving you the time and attention you want – whether it’s someone you’re dating, your boyfriend, or your husband?

Even worse… Do you allow those thoughts to pop out of your mouth in the form of statements like:

“We never spend any quality time together?”

“You have time for everyone and everything else, except me!”

“Why don’t you want to spend time with me anymore?”

While it may seem as if you are simply “being honest” or “sharing your feelings,” the truth is that there are a few words that describe those kinds of statements: nagging, complaining, and criticizing.

Now, before you scroll down to write a comment to tell me off or give me all the reasons why this IS how you feel, hear me out.

I get that you want to spend more time with him. Chances are that, when you see him spending less time with you, it triggers some fears and doubts in you about how he really feels about you. In fact, you may even have asked him how he feels about you (something I’ll cover in another post!).

I really do hear you.

However, consider that those statements, while they may be said with underlying valid feelings and desires, they don’t communicate the real feelings and thoughts underneath the complaints. Instead, they communicate:

“You’re wrong.”

“I’m needy.”

“It’s your responsibility to make me happy.”

So, how can you say what you feel WITHOUT nagging, complaining, or pushing your guy away?

Say some simple and clear messages such as:

“I miss you.”

“I feel lonely.”

“I love spending time with you.”

I know… Those are pretty vulnerable statements and it’s scary to be vulnerable, especially if you’re questioning how he feels about you.

However, if you close your eyes, take a deep breath, and breathe deep into your heart for just a minute, you’ll see the truth in them: This is how you really feel.

What’s even better, if you share your feelings with him this way, he’ll actually be able to hear you!

And that’s what you really want, right?

See, the truth is that there isn’t a man on this planet who has EVER been inspired by nagging, criticism, or complaining.

These statements are simply not inspiring or motivating. In fact, you’ve probably noticed that they have the opposite effect, making him pull further away from you, and they don’t really do much to change the situations… Which has you bring it up again, and again, and again, with NO different results.

If this has been your experience, we’d like to invite you to try something different!

The next time you’re feeling as if your guy isn’t spending enough time with you, and you’re tempted to complain about it, I invite you to say something like:

“I miss you.”

“I’d love to spend time together.”

“I can’t wait to have some time alone.”

These statements are A LOT more inspiring, they let him know how you are feeling, and they will allow him to hear you.

Oh! And don’t be surprised if he begins spending more time with you!

If you’re feeling like you’re not getting the time and attention you want from your man and you’d like support and guidance on how to turn things around, we’ve opened up some time in our calendars for you to schedule a Love Breakthrough Session with one of us.

On this call, we’ll help you see what is getting in the way of you having the kind of experience you want to have in dating or your relationship, and we’ll create a step-by-step plan for you to follow so that you being to experience the love and happiness your heart desires!

CLICK HERE to schedule your Love Breakthrough Session!

Love, dating, and relationships do NOT have to be hard. They are easy when you know exactly what to do and say to get the results you want without having to force, nag, or “get him” to do what you want! Let us help you!

Schedule a Love Breakthrough Session and get the love you want!

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