Heart's Desire Intl

How To Take Control of the Negative Thoughts In Your Head!

by heartsdesireintl | Aug 8, 2022 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Love, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Self-Love, Success, Successful Women

by Gladys Diaz

How can you decipher the “truth” of what goes on inside your head?

How do you know if the negative thoughts you have (that we all have by the way) are what’s “real” or if they’re simply something you’re imagining, a limiting belief you have from the past or a “trigger”.

Here’s a secret for you…

90% of the thoughts you have are negative. Can you believe that?!

Those thoughts are not always, “the world is coming to an end” type of thoughts, but they are some form of fear, worry or anxiety.

This is true for us, for you and for every other person on the planet.

Why?

Because we’re human.

We’re designed to survive. It’s built into us to look for outside circumstances that may cause us harm.

Here’s the thing though…

Most of us no longer live in a world where we need to be on the constant look-out for danger.

Unfortunately our brains don’t know that and continue to throw worrying thoughts at you all day long!

When it comes to dating and relationships these negative thoughts might look like…

…”Why is my boyfriend going on a 3-day work trip with that female colleague of his? They usually only go for 2 days.”

… “Why hasn’t that guy called me yet? He said he would – he must be a flake!”

… “This guy is amazing! I can’t believe how much fun we’re having together. When am I going to find out the truth about him?”

… “Why is my husband always looking at his phone? Am I not interesting enough to want to talk to?”

You get the idea.

What are some of the negative thoughts that are currently impacting your love life?

The kicker is that all negative thoughts (left unchecked) lead to negative actions. These negative actions usually lead to some sort of emotional spin or fall-out.

Which is super unfortunate – especially if the negative thought is something that’s not even real right?!

So – what can you do to interrupt those negative thoughts so you don’t become the crazy lady that’s stalking your husband’s phone, doing late night drive-bys of your boyfriend’s house or constantly finding reasons to text the guy you just met.

(We’ve been there and chances are you have to.)

1) When a negative or fearful thought enters your mind – count to 3, take a deep breath and ask yourself, “What am I making this mean?”

By doing this you’re interrupting the pattern. We aren’t always in control of the thoughts that come into our mind, but we are in control of what we do with them.

When you take a moment to pause – you’re taking control and beginning to have a conscious conversation with yourself rather than reacting to whatever’s happening inside or outside.

2) Do the HeartWork to uncover what’s underneath these thoughts. Get to the root of what has you feeling insecure, jealous, worried or afraid.

This is so important because if you don’t heal the root wound – nothing will ever change. You’ll constantly find reasons to continue to believe that you aren’t good enough, that men aren’t reliable or good or that you’ll never have the love you dream of.

Until you heal the thing that’s causing the negative belief in the first place, you’ll continue to experience the same worries, fear and insecurities.

Are you ready for something more?

Are you ready to take control of your thoughts and become the confident woman that KNOWS she is SAFE and LOVEABLE?

If you answered yes, then join us next week for the Real Love Breakthrough Challenge!

This challenge is 5 days of high energy, high fun, and high power transformation that will have you breakthrough what’s standing between you and the real love, happiness, connection and intimacy that you want.

Join us for the Real Love Breakthrough Challenge here!

At the end of next week you’ll know exactly what’s keeping you from experiencing the relationship that you dream about and you will have broken through the thing that is continuing to stop you from creating it.

Your time is now!

Don’t waste another day swimming through the negative thoughts in your head.

Take control and begin creating the life and love you want now!

Join us here. We can’t wait to see you there.

How to Know If It’s a “Red Flag” or a “Fear Flag”.

by heartsdesireintl | Aug 1, 2022 | breakups, Coaching, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Love, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Self-Love, Successful Women

by Gladys Diaz

“Oh my gosh, is that a red flag?”

When you’re out there dating and getting to know men, do you often find yourself thinking that question?

Do you know the difference between a “red flag” and a “fear flag”?

The term “red flag” is thrown around a lot by women who are dating. If we had a dollar for every time we’ve heard it in our work – we’d have a lot, I mean a lot a lot – of dollars!!

There definitely are some red flags that you want to be aware of while dating. It’s important to be awake and aware when you’re getting to know men and thinking about who you’d like to spend your life with.

However, a lot of the things women think are red flags simply aren’t.

So, what is an actual red flag?

A red flag in dating is something that causes you real (versus imagined or feared), physical or emotional danger.

Primary examples of red flags in dating are:

Threats of physical abuse
Signs of physical anger
Hitting things (or you) when angry
Consistently rude, disrespectful with you/others
Makes fun of you or is degrading
Verbal abuse when angry
Actively addicted to alcohol, marijuana, substances, pornography, or gambling (just to name a few)
A man that’s still married (even if he’s separated or in the process of divorce)

Red flags are things that are character flaws or character traits that don’t work in loving, committed, happy, long-term relationships.

Some of them are usually obvious from the get-go, but many of them usually don’t come out right away during the dating process.

This is why it’s so important to give yourself time to get to know someone.

Dating is simply the process of getting to know someone to see if you want to keep getting to know them.

When you give yourself that time, you can look for consistency of authenticity so you can discern for yourself if any of these true red flags are present.

When you give yourself that time, you don’t need to be afraid that you’ll make a poor decision or that you won’t see everything you need to see.

The thing is, if you’re finding that every single man you’re attracting is bringing up the “red flag” question – why would you want to keep doing that?

Get curious about why you’re continuing to attract these types of issues into your life.

Your red flag is the one that’s waving in the wind letting you know there’s a pattern within you from an emotional wound from the past that’s begging to be healed.

One of our clients recently got engaged to an incredible man who she’s madly in love with! When she messaged us to let us know the good news she said, “I almost didn’t date him because I thought he was a scammer.” It felt too good to be true to her, and she almost ran away.

Good thing she had a coach who was able to support her through her “fear flags” so she could heal the emotional wounds inside of her while she took the time to get to know the incredible man that she now gets to love and be loved by for a lifetime!

So, if you’re ready to attract the man that’s going to be your partner for a life-time, then you need to join us in September for Irresistible Woman LIVE!

If you’re tired of attracting men who aren’t what you’re looking for….

If you’re sick of experiencing red flags in dating…

If you’re simply tired of feeling afraid and not trusting yourself to see clearly and make the best decisions for you….

You get to do the HeartWork that will heal you from the patterns that are having you continue to experience “red flags” and “fear flags”!

That’s what we’ll be teaching you at Irresistible Woman LIVE!

The way you relate to yourself and the way you relate to men will be completely transformed!

Grab your ticket here!

When you’re out there dating, we want you to attract high-quality men, know that you’re safe and know that you have the power inside you to create everything you dream of.

That’s what you’ll get when you join us at Irresistible Woman LIVE.

Claim your spot here.

The Secret To Stop Getting “Triggered”!

by heartsdesireintl | Jul 15, 2022 | breakups, Coaching, Communication, Dating, Getting engaged, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, keeping the love alive, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Self-Love, Success, Successful Women

by Gladys Diaz

Would you like to be able to feel confident in any situation or conversation you encounter that you’ll be able to handle it with grace and ease?

How would it feel to experience less reactivity or emotional meltdown and experience more happiness and joy?

Imagine what it would mean for your life if you were able to maintain peace inside of you no matter what happens around you?

Tomorrow in the Girl, It’s Not Personal! Workshop we’re going to be showing you how to create just that!

See if this scenario sounds familiar:

Something happens…

… your boyfriend says something in a “tone”

… a guy you’ve been texting stops responding

… your boss calls you in for an unscheduled meeting

… a co-worker doesn’t do something they promised they’d do

… someone cuts you off on the highway

And all of the sudden you feel disrespected, rejected, worried or angry.

You’re “triggered.”

A memory, fear or limiting belief was opened up and like a domino effect sets off a series of other thoughts and associated behaviors.

The switch has been flipped and you have an emotional reaction that has you say or do things you later regret. Your mind and mouth take on a mind of their own and it’s not until after the dust has settled that you regret your behavior and see the line of carnage in your wake.

We’ve all been there, .

There was a time when Ric and I couldn’t even talk about some things for longer then 5 minutes because one of us would explode.

Sometimes the fall-out you create from these emotional reactions is short-lived.

But sometimes, the result is a complete loss of a relationship, future relationship, or opportunity.

The result is always a loss of personal peace and confidence and the impact on you and those around you is loss of time, energy, intimacy, connection, happiness and joy.

What if you didn’t have to experience things that way?

What if you could turn off the “trigger” in an instant before it spiraled out of control?

What if you could have mastery over your emotions instead of being a reaction waiting to happen?

That’s what we’re going to be teaching you how to do tomorrow in the Girl, It’s Not Personal! Workshop.

You’re going to learn how to:

Identify the emotional triggers that have you react, strike back, or shut down in conversations and relationships.

Break through the automatic and limiting thought patterns that are negatively impacting your communication and relationships, so that you can attract and keep the love your heart desires

Increase your level of self awareness and master managing your emotions , so that you are able to have empowering conversations and build a strong, happy, and loving relationship

The reason why marriages aren’t working right now is because most people don’t have the skills to not have a reaction to what others say and do.

Ric and I almost lost our marriage because of this.

But we didn’t because we up-leveled our emotional intelligence by learning the tools and skills that work in communicating and relationships. Now we can discuss anything for as long as we want to and maintain connection, love and peace in the space.

And that’s what we want for you too.

Register for this powerful free masterclass HERE!

How To Be the Confident, Secure Woman Who’s Ready for Love Now!

by heartsdesireintl | Jun 13, 2022 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, keeping the love alive, Love, Ready to Love Again, Self-Love, Successful Women

by Gladys Diaz

Do you ever feel insecure while dating?

Do you wonder things like…

“What if he doesn’t like me?”
“What if we don’t feel the same connection when we see each other that we felt on the phone?”
“What if the same insecurities that had me sabotage the last relationship come up this time?”
“Will I ever just be able to be myself and know that it’s enough?”

When you feel insecure your thoughts take you away from where would really make a difference for you to be – which is inside yourself.

The key to successful dating – and the eventual dream relationship is knowing what you want, feeling secure with who you are and choosing a partner that supports you in creating that relationship.

So – how can you feel secure while dating?

The #1 thing that has women feel insecure in dating is not dating correctly and thinking they are in a relationship before they actually are.

The most important thing to remember while you’re dating is this –

Dating IS NOT a relationship.

Dating involves getting to know different men so that you can have as many different experiences as possible while discovering what it is that you want to experience in a relationship.

If you start out expecting something to become a relationship then you get attached to the idea of the man too soon – before you actually know him. Those expectations cause you to feel insecure when he doesn’t reciprocate the attachment as quickly and usually leads to the man pulling away and the dating experience coming to an end.

On the other hand, if you’re dating many men at the same time and allowing yourself to really get to know them – you keep yourself from becoming too attached to anyone prematurely and allow yourself to be fully awake to see who is showing up for you, how you feel in the experience and what you want to develop further.

And trust us – when a man wants to be in a relationship, you will know it!

Good high, quality men who know what they want, don’t waste any time becoming exclusive and committed to the woman they want to be with.

Now – here’s the thing:

Even though dating correctly and remembering that there are plenty of good men out there is important –

– the most important thing you can do to make sure you feel secure in dating – is to increase your confidence in yourself and get crystal clear about what it is that you want to experience in life and in a relationship.

If you continue to attract men who don’t know what they want or aren’t aligned with what you’d like to experience in a relationship then you need to do the HeartWork to understand what is causing you to attract what you don’t want and how you can break through and create something different!

When you create clarity, you increase your level of security and can feel certain within yourself no matter what others do or what your outside circumstances are.

When you become connected to your authentic self and fully see the vulnerable beauty that you are – then men are attracted to that energy in you!

If you’re ready to have a breakthrough and become the confident, secure woman who’s ready for love then you need to join us on Saturday for Love Breakthrough LIVE!

On this FREE LIVE Love Breakthrough Coaching Call, we’ll be coaching YOU on how to identify your love barriers, break through them, and step into the love your heart truly desires.

Click here to register to join us!

After you register you’ll have the opportunity to apply to be coached live on the session –

And when you do, you’ll be coached on the call the same way we coach our clients, which will lead you to have incredible breakthroughs and create the love you want NOW!

We can’t wait for Saturday and hope we see your face there!

Image courtesy of Unsplash.com

How To See the Real, Vulnerable, Inspiring, Authentic, Magnetic, Beautiful YOU!

by heartsdesireintl | Apr 29, 2022 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Love, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Self-Love, Success, Successful Women

by Gladys Diaz

We’re sure you’ve heard the saying, “Fake it til you make it” right?

Do you ever feel like you’re doing that when you’re on a date, in a job interview, working on a project or meeting someone new?

What if we told you that you never need to feel that way again?! That there’s no need to fake it until you make anything!

We believe the real magic is in the phrase, “Be It and Believe It and then You Will See It!”

What does that mean?

If you’re not in the relationship, job, house (or anything really) of your dreams, there’s something about the authentic you that’s not showing up.

The laws of the universe make it so that when you’re really authentically being you and accepting all of that – your frequency is elevated so high that you naturally attract exactly what you want to you.

When you’re BEing authentically YOU – your vibration is elevated so high that a high quality man that wants exactly who you are is drawn to you!

Well, if that’s true then why aren’t we all walking around being authentically ourselves all the time?

Why do we still sometimes feel like we have to “fake it”?

Here are 5 ways you may not be being authentic (that you may or may not be aware of):

Hiding – When you hide part of yourself, keep a mask up, don’t say what you want or that something’s hurting you – those are all examples of hiding and not being authentic
Fighting – Having a “take it or leave it” attitude because of residue from past heartbreak, being reactive because of fear, getting angry when you’re afraid to get vulnerable
Running Away – You stop responding to a guy if you don’t like something he says/does, break something off that you’re still enjoying because you’re afraid to get hurt
Settling – Pretending you’re happy in a relationship when you know it’s not what you want, convincing yourself that you’re in a relationship when you’re actually not, thinking that something is better than nothing
Holding on – Not letting go of something that’s over or that should be over because it’s not everything you/the other person really want

If you’re not being yourself a man simply can’t fall in love with YOU because he can only fall in love with what you’re showing him.

If there’s parts of you that aren’t being 100% yourself then whatever relationship you create is only a reflection of that and will never be complete.

When you do the HeartWork to develop the type of relationship with yourself that has you know and accept yourself – flaws and all – then your entire experience of life changes and what you attract into your life is a reflection of that!

That’s why you’ve got to join us for the BE-YOU-tifully YOU 5-Day Challenge next week!

In this challenge we’ll be showing you how to:

take off the masks you’re wearing
break through the walls you have up
take the things you’re doing to sabotage your goals and show you what to do instead

In 5 days you’ll be able to see the vulnerable, inspiring, authentic, magnetic, real beautiful YOU!!

Yes, I’m ready to fall in love with ME!

Here’s your opportunity. You can either keep doing this on your own, or you can do it with a coach by your side. So many women in our community have gotten engaged and married as a result of participating in this challenge – and that can soon be you!

Don’t miss out!

Sign up for the BE-YOU-tifully YOU Challenge Now.

The Secret To Making Life (a lot) Easier

by heartsdesireintl | Apr 22, 2022 | Coaching, Dating, Getting engaged, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Love, Relationship, Self-Love, Success, Successful Women

by Gladys Diaz

Would you like dating to be easier?

Would you like relationships to be more fulfilling?

Would you like things in life to work out with less heartache or frustration?

If you answered yes to any of those questions, we want you to know that the answer is to increase your confidence.

When you lack self-confidence you…

… question yourself.

… feel like you can’t trust yourself.

… make decisions that aren’t aligned with what you want to create in your life.

One of the most important things you can know in life is that the relationship you have with YOU supercedes all the other relationships in your life.

Why?

Because the relationship you have with you determines how all your other relationships will be!
Real confidence is about creating an intimate relationship with you.

It’s about answering the question: “Who am I and how am I being with ME?

If you find that you:

– Question yourself

– stay in relationships, jobs, friendships, etc knowing that the experience you’re having is not what you want

– consistently fall in love with potential instead of reality

– make excuses for disrespectful or even abusive behavior

– hold onto something that you know is not for you

– don’t honor your values

… then it’s time to look in and reflect on the relationship you have with you!

You want to ask yourself:

What am I seeing?
What experiences do I keep repeating?
What is the pattern?
What am I creating?
What actions did I take to create this?
What did I do that brought this result?
What had me take those actions?
What thoughts are behind the action?

The thoughts behind the actions are where you uncover the limiting beliefs that are creating the patterns that are bringing you the results you don’t want!

Looking for patterns in your thoughts, words, actions and results will give you the biggest insight into what’s not working.

And when you’re open to seeing it, and you then you do, – then you have a shot at breaking through those sabotaging patterns so you can increase your confidence!

This is GOLD!

Life gets good when you have enough confidence to receive the feedback life is giving you (whether through the results you’re having or through what others are telling you) and then take action doing the HeartWork to shift these patterns!

It’s not about being perfect.

If you’re human you’re going to make mistakes (and so is he!)

When you learn to trust yourself and know that you have what it takes to do what you need to do and be who you need to be, life (and dating) get easier.

You know that if you get it wrong (because sometimes you will) it doesn’t have to shake your confidence. You can move forward with grace and take the actions that will make it right for you.

It all comes down to your relationship with you.

Which is why we’re so excited about the BE-YOU-tifully YOU Challenge that begins next Monday!

This challenge is all about falling in love with you.

In this challenge you will:

Remove the mask you hide behind that’s blocking you from the love you want
Find your voice and say what you want and feel without being afraid of pushing him away
Stop pretending or not honoring your boundaries in order to “get” someone to love you
Stop settling for less than you want and deserve in relationships
Stop doubting yourself and your ability to attract the right man or the relationship of your dreams

Join the BE-YOU-tifully YOU Challenge NOW!

These 5 days will change your life because when you create the kind of relationship with yourself that gives you the kind of confidence you want to have – your life will go to a whole new level!

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