Yesterday was the first day of school for my kids, and I took the opportunity to pamper myself and get a deep-tissue Swedish massage, courtesy of my wonderful hubby!
As I was lying on the table, enjoying the soft meditation music, the candles, and looking forward to a nice, relaxing massage, all of a sudden, all I could feel was PAIN! And lots of it!
I actually found myself holding my breath a few times because of the pain I could feel under the masseuse’s expert hands!
At one point, I thought I would tell her to stop, and then I noticed something…
I began to notice how my muscles were responding to her touch.
I became aware of how, while I wasn’t stressed out or feeling pain when I first laid down on the table, there were parts of my body that were obviously story pain and stress, based on the “knots” she was finding and deeply massaging.
And, I noticed how she would dig really deep into a muscle, work there for a while, go somewhere else, and then come back to it and work on it some more.
That’s when I thought of you! (Yes, even while getting a massage, you are on my mind! Can’t help it!)
Here’s why:
I started thinking about how, sometimes, we have some “deep-tissue” pain stored in our memories, our hearts, and our bodies that are related to the past.
Maybe it has to do with a relationship that ended painfully.
Maybe you’re in a relationship right now, where you’re feeling some pain.
Or perhaps you’re feeling stuck in your life and you keep wondering, “I’ve prayed, meditated, read all these books, watched videos, attended courses, and worked with different coaches! When am I finally going to break through this?”
I get it! I’ve been there myself! And, here’s the deal:
Sometimes, you just need to go back and dig a little deeper to truly release the pain so that you can move forward with joy, peace, and the love you desire and deserve!
It’s during those times of release that you are able to put the past back in the past where it belongs so that you can move toward the present and future that are waiting for you!
Well, I was so inspired by all of the thoughts and insights I had during that massage, that, when I finished, I went to Facebook and shot a live video (Well, two, actually, because I lost connection during the first one, but I just had to share this with you!)
I know it can be tempting to feel like the “deep-tissue” inner work you’ve done isn’t working, but… what if…?
What if you’re just inches away from your next breakthrough?
What if you can dig a little deeper and finally have the happiness and love you want?
What would that make possible for you?
Check out the video and let me know what opens up for you!
Don’t forget to comment below! We love hearing from you!
I’ll admit it. Today’s video took a little bit of courage to make, because I’m sharing something I’m not very proud of that happened between my husband and me.
The moment I said it, I regretted it!
I felt it was important to share it, however, because any relationship, no matter how good it is, has it’s ups and downs. The key is knowing what to do when you slip!
So, as uncomfortable as this was to share, if it helps you to create more love and intimacy in your relationship – even after an argument – it’s worth it!
Remember: While our relationships aren’t “perfect,” they can still be great!
And, by the way, I’d love to hear from YOU!
If you have a question about love and communication that you’d like answered, send me an email (gladys@heartsdesireintl.com) or leave me a comment below, and I’ll make sure I personally respond to you!
If you live in the U.S., I hope you are having a wonderful Memorial Day! If you love or know someone who gave his/her life in service of our country, please know that I am grateful beyond words and have said a prayer of thanks today in memory of your loved one!
Today I was offering support to a fellow coach, and I shared with her an exercise that I use myself and with my clients that you can use whenever you are in “relationship breakdown.” I wanted to share it with you, too, in case you are or find yourself in some sort of relationship breakdown yourself.
A relationship breakdown is anytime that there is a breakdown, or upset, in your relationship with someone else, whether that’s in dating or in an actual committed relationship. It usually stems from an unmet expectation and can lead to further problems in the relationship, unless you use this simple process to move from breakdown to feeling empowered in the relationship.
You can also use this 4-step process in other relationships, but, since love is my specialty, I focused this short video on what to do if you’re upset and disempowered because you feel something is missing in your romantic relationship.
This short 4-step process could lead to having a HUGE breakthrough in your love life!
Watch the video and let me know what your response to #4 is!
It’s hard to believe that we’re already in February. If you’re like me, January went by in a blur. As I was meditating yesterday, I took a look at the goals and intentions I set for this year to hold myself accountable.
There are some goals I am right on-point with. I’ve stuck to my action plan and I feel very proud of myself for moving beyond my comfort zone and sticking to the promises I’ve made to myself.
There are a few, however, where I had to be real with myself.
How intentional have I been about taking an action step every day in the direction of meeting this goal?
Where did I allow my fears and doubts to get in the way?
Am I going to quit or recommit?
That last question is the most powerful one.
Why?
Because too often, the reason people do not hit their goals is because they quit – sometimes just centimeters from the finish line they can’t see because their fears, doubts, and limiting beliefs are so much bigger than the faith they have in themselves to actually have what they say they want.
Chances are that if you didn’t bother to set any goals or intentions for 2016, it’s because you have doubt.
You either doubt that you can have what you want, or you doubt that you can do what it takes to achieve it. More than likely, it’s a combination of both.
Self-doubt is what has you not put your heart out there.
You doubt your ability to be able to attract the kind of man you want.
You doubt that you can actually have the kind of relationship you want.
And, if you’re 100% honest with yourself, you doubt this because you either think that what you want is “unrealistic” or “too good to be true.”
That’s just another way of hiding the fact that you doubt that you’re worth having that kind of love.
If you’re in a relationship, you pretend that everything is okay, even though your heart is breaking and things haven’t been remotely close to okay in a long time.
You keep holding onto a broken relationship, not doing anything to change it or yourself for fear that any changes you try to make won’t work.
It’s easier to ignore what’s not working, to keep wishing things (especially him) will change on their own.
Again, this goes back to doubting your ability to have the kind of relationship your heart truly desires.
Staying stuck in the same rut is only going to give you the same results.
Things only change when you make a change.
That’s it. There’s no magic bullet, no secret formula.
If you want to have a different experience and different results in your love life, you need to trust that there IS a way for you to have the love and happiness you want.
Now, I get that you may not know how to do that.
If you did, chances are you probably would have made the changes already, right?
Well, that’s when you need to choose: Do I quit or recommit?
If you’re ready to recommit to yourself and your desire to have a happy, loving, intimate relationship where you get to feel loved and cherished, accepted and adored for the amazing woman you are, then it’s time to recommit to YOU!
And if you’re unsure of how to do that, which steps to take first, and you’d like some support, click the link below to schedule time to talk.
Doing nothing is going to give you the same results you have right now.
Choosing to recommit to yourself, your relationship goals and the love your heart desires is how you can make sure that 2016 is the year of making your relationship dreams come true!
By the way… If the little voice of doubt in your head is saying things like, “Why bother?” or “What’s the point?” I want to challenge you to move beyond the safety of listening to that voice — the one that’s kept you stuck right where you are — and click the link below! This is the first step in your love breakthrough!
Like many holidays and celebrations, New Year’s Eve can trigger bitter-sweet feelings.
On one hand, it can be disheartening if you’ve gotten to the end of the year without having attained all of the goals you’d set for yourself 12 months ago. This can be particularly true if you are not in the happy, loving relationship you dream of.
On the other hand, it can be exciting and uplifting to know that you have a whole new year ahead of you filled with unlimited possibilities – with one of those real possibilities being to finally have the loving relationship your heart desires.
So, how do we reconcile the disheartening thoughts with the uplifting ones?
You can do it in 3 easy steps!
Breathe. If you’re like most women, you can be pretty hard on yourself. Many times, this is most evident in the things you tell yourself about yourself. If you’ve been putting yourself down, thinking that there must be something “wrong” with you because you haven’t manifested the love you want yet, take a deep breath and allow the love that surrounds you (and, yes, it’s always all around you and within you) to enter into your heart.
If you still don’t feel the love that surrounds you within you,
Breathe again…
Keep inhaling until you can fill your lungs anymore.
Hold it 3 seconds and envision the love filling every part of your being.
Allow love to fill you.
Do this as many times as you need to until you literally and physically feel love filling your being.
Once you are able to feel the love within you…
Release. As you exhale, release all of those negative thoughts, beliefs and toxic emotions that do not serve you. Breathe out all of the pain, sadness, and feelings of dissatisfaction. Release yourself from the hold that those disempowering thoughts create in your life. Those are the thoughts that keep you holding onto dead-end relationships, stop you from moving on, and keep you repeating dysfunctional patterns in relationships.
If you are having trouble releasing yourself from the negative thoughts, beliefs and emotions,
Go back to Step #1, Breathe, and do 2 or 3 more loving breaths.
On each exhale, envision yourself releasing all of the pain, sadness, and disempowering thoughts and emotions from your body.
With each exhalation, you are releasing what doesn’t work and allowing more love to enter you on the inhalation.
It’s okay if you feel like crying. As you do the exercise, the sad tears will turn to tears of gratitude as you allow love to enter, surround, and fill you up!
Once you feel you have released the disempowering thoughts and emotions…
Renew. In this new space, where love is what you are present to, renew your commitment to yourself to create the loving, happy, fulfilling relationship your heart desires. Commit to doing whatever it takes to transform the thoughts, words, and behaviors that have stopped you from experiencing the love you desire and deserve.
Commitment without action is nothing but wishful thinking. This is why so many people get to the end of a year without having reached the goals and dreams they declared at the beginning of the year. It’s only when you are taking consistent action in the direction of your goals and dreams that you are able to manifest them! So, to ensure that 2016 is actually different for you and you are experiencing the love your heart truly desires, follow these steps:
Identify the person/people who can teach and help you to create and experience the loving romantic relationship you want. A happily married relationship coach who can teach you the skills that will have you attract, create, and nurture a healthy romantic relationship is the best option. And, with us, you get two coaches for the price of one! 🙂
With your coach, identify 1-3 action steps you will take to create renewal in your love life.
Commit to fulfilling on those actions steps no matter what.
The reason most people do not reach their goals and manifest their dreams is because they quit. They quit on their dreams, in doing so, they give up on themselves.
This is why working with a coach is so important. You have built-in accountability.
Why?
Because, left to your own devices, you will do what you you’ve always done. You’ll do what’s comfortable, what you’re familiar with, and those are the same things that have given you the results you have now.
I’m not being negative here. This is what we all do. The results we have are consistent with the actions we’ve taken and those actions are consistent with what we’ve been committed to.
So, if you’re ready to make 2016 THE YEAR of love, intimacy, and romance for yourself, first BREATH, RELEASE, and RENEW.
Then make a real commitment to yourself to do whatever it takesto manifest the love you want.
Have your first action step be to schedule a call with one of us to help you identify your 1-3 action steps that will lead you in the direction of the relationship of your dreams!
We promise we’ll do whatever it takes to support and guide you in making your relationship dream come true.
We will stand for you, hold you accountable, and be there when you need someone to remind you just how worthy you are of having the love your heart desires!
Creating the love you want does not have to be “hard.” It can be easy when you have the right guidance and know exactly which steps to take to create the loving, happy, fulfilling relationship you desire and deserve.
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