Heart's Desire Intl

Discover the 3 Self-Saboteurs Keeping You from the Right Man!

by heartsdesireintl | Jul 11, 2023 | Coaching, Dating, Getting engaged, Heart's Desire International, Love, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Self-Love, Success

by Gladys Diaz

Are you finding yourself on an endless carousel of disappointing dates?

Are you attracting the wrong type of men, time and again?

Perhaps it’s not simply a matter of luck or circumstance, but of unconscious self-sabotage.

Sabotage is doing anything that’s not aligned with what you say you desire.

The reason why it’s unconscious is because you don’t realize you’re doing it! I’m sure you don’t wake up in the morning and think, “I can’t wait to sabotage my day (or love life)!”

Even so, the truth is – you’re always manifesting something, whether it’s what you want or what you don’t want.

And if you want to be in an extraordinary relationship, and you’re not – something is getting in the way.

Keep reading to explore three common self-saboteurs that might be hindering you from attracting the right man. Once you’re aware of these, you’ll be better equipped to make positive changes that can drastically improve your dating experiences.

Saboteur #1: Behaviors and Patterns

Since we said that most (if not all) self-sabotaging is unconscious, the easiest way to know if you’re self-sabotaging is to look at the behaviors and patterns that are not aligned with what you say you want.

Do you tolerate disrespectful behavior?

Do you not set or maintain your values and boundaries?

Do you constantly put others’ needs before your own?

Do you notice you settle for whatever’s showing up?

Do you get angry when a guy doesn’t call you for a 2nd date?

Do you write someone off before giving yourself a chance to get to know them because they aren’t tall enough, have been divorced or have kids?

Do you shut down and “take a break” from dating (perhaps for longer than really necessary) after a disappointing dating experience?

These are all examples of behaviors that can sabotage your dating experiences that you may not recognize.

Knowing what you want to experience inside the relationship of your dreams and BEing the woman who knows she can have it all supports you in transforming these behaviors and patterns that may be getting in the way.

When working to transform your actions it’s important to look for what thoughts are underneath them and driving the behavior.

Saboteur #2: Limiting Beliefs and Fears

The #1 most significant and common self-saboteur is overlooking the thoughts that are sabotaging you. Your thoughts lead to your behavior which leads to the patterns you’ve developed and the results you create.

What you attract is an energetic match for what you truly believe. In other words, you attract what you are, not what you want.

So, if you’re carrying unresolved issues, harboring negativity, or stuck in unhealthy patterns, you’re likely to attract individuals who mirror these same characteristics.

If you’re afraid you’re going to end up with a man who’s controlling, that’s probably exactly what you’re attracting – controlling men.

If you think all men are liars and cheaters, what will you attract? Men who don’t follow through with what they say and aren’t ready to commit.

Invest time in understanding and improving your thought patterns. If you’d like support with distinguishing, dismantling and replacing sabotaging thoughts, schedule a Love Breakthrough Session!

On this call we’ll support you to discover the thoughts that are leading to the dating experiences you don’t want so you can have a breakthrough and begin to create the results you desire!

Click HERE to Book your Complimentary Love Breakthrough Session Now!

By focusing on becoming the best version of you, you’ll naturally become more attractive to those who value and appreciate the qualities you’ve nurtured within yourself.

Saboteur #3: Clinging to What you Know and Not Getting Curious About What’s Not Working

If you want to be in the relationship of your dreams and you’re not – something is getting in the way.

I promise you, these are not the issues:

Where you live
What you do for a living
How much you weigh
Your age
How much debt you have
How many prior relationship you have (or haven’t) been in
There’s no good men out there or all the good ones are already taken

Holding onto these sabotaging and circumstantial beliefs can set you up for constant disappointment and make you overlook potentially great matches because they don’t fit your preconceived mold or because you don’t think you’re ready or deserving of love.

If you’re not attracting the type of man you’d like or creating the results you desire in dating and relationships, get curious and ask yourself, “Why am I attracting this?”

Attracting the right man is not about getting on the “right” dating apps or wearing the right outfit. It’s about introspection, self-improvement, and maintaining a healthy sense of self-worth.

If you find yourself constantly attracting the wrong kind of men, perhaps it’s time to step back and examine these areas of your life.

Avoid these self-sabotaging mistakes, and you’ll create a path to attract a partner who values, respects, and cherishes you, just as you are.

If you’d like support in having a breakthrough, then click HERE to schedule a Love Breakthrough Call with one of our fabulous Love Coaches.

Take this opportunity for yourself to overcome the thought and behavior patterns that are sabotaging your love life!

Remember, the journey to finding the right person often starts with being the right person to yourself. It’s time to become the person who attracts the love you deserve.

Reclaiming Your Power and Attracting the Love You Truly Deserve

by heartsdesireintl | Jun 30, 2023 | breakups, Coaching, Dating, Getting engaged, Heart's Desire International, heartache, Love, Marriage, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Self-Love

by Gladys Diaz

One of the things we hear most from women is that they’re struggling to let go of a relationship – either a toxic relationship from the past or a “situationship” they’re currently in that’s not going anywhere.

They want to be able to break ties with their ex so they can be truly ready to attract the man who will be by their side forever.

They want to let go of the fear of rejection and allow themselves to really be seen, heard and loved!

They share that they have thoughts like this:

“Why can’t I let this go?”

“Why am I still stuck on this one person?”
“How will I ever move on from this toxic experience so I can have real love?”

“When am I going to stop settling for crumbs so that I can love and be loved the way I really want?”

Is this something you’ve dealt with (or are currently trying to break free from) too?

If being able to let go of past heartbreaks so you can manifest the committed relationship of your dreams is what you want, then this is for you.

Letting go can be challenging, but it’s essential for your growth and for opening up space in your heart to welcome true love. It involves recognizing what you’re holding onto, defining what it is that you really want and choosing to be in the relationship that is aligned.

So what does a toxic relationship look like?

Emotional/physical abuse
Verbal disrespect
Hurting each other on purpose
Brings out the worst in you or the other person
Manipulation
With someone who’s unavailable (married, separated, “getting divorced”)
Thinking you can “change” the person
Trying to “convince” them to want to commit to you or that they eventually will if you stay there long enough.

Basically any relationship where you have more unhappy moments than happy moments is toxic.

And yes, this includes situationships.

A “situationship” is where you’re spending time with someone and acting like you’re his girlfriend, when you’re not.

Even if you’re sleeping together, until he tells you straight that he wants to be committed to you, that he doesn’t want to see any other women and that he wants you to be committed to him – then it’s not a relationship.

If you say, “Well, it’s complicated.”

It’s not a relationship.

If you say, “We have an understanding and we’re both okay with it.”

It’s not a relationship.

If you have to ask him, “Where is this going?” then you already have your answer.

It’s not a relationship.

It’s either a relationship or it’s not and if it’s not and you’re acting like it is then you’re becoming emotionally attached and he’s not.

You may ask, “What’s so wrong with that?”

Here’s the problem with emotionally investing in a relationship that’s not reciprocated…

The heartache of breaking a situationship is just as bad and hurts just as much as breaking a real relationship (sometimes even more so).

Why?

Because you’ve invested so much emotion, time, attention and hope into something that wasn’t real anyway.

When you do that, you’re not only lying to yourself but over time you’ll feel resentment, regret, anger and like he used you (even though you were a willing participate).

These emotions – resentment, blame, anger, guilt, shame and regret – are toxic emotions that can be hard to move on from. You feel these emotions towards yourself and then project them onto the other person because you didn’t honor your boundaries, your dream, your vision.

Why would you do that to yourself?

We know that being alone can feel hard and painful sometimes, but here’s the truth:

Being in a relationship that’s anything less than what you really want is just as painful.

Even if it’s fun and passionate and exciting for a few weeks, it always ends in these toxic emotions and experiences that are hard to let go of and move on from.

We’ve coached women who have waited 2 years, 5 years, 12 years, 17 years for someone they thought they were in a relationship with to choose them!

If commitment and marriage is something you want, and for most of the women in our community that is what they want – then this is heartbreaking!

Most don’t want a long-term relationship. They don’t want something where they constantly have to wonder if he’s seeing other women, sleeping with someone else or if it’s ever going to go anywhere.

They want love, companionship and commitment.

So why do women stay in relationships or “situationships” that aren’t everything they want?

Fear that they’re never going to find what they want.
Feeling like something is better than nothing.
A belief that they type of man and relationship isn’t out there.
Not being clear on what they really want and then settling for whatever comes.

If you’re tired of not being in the relationship you want or settling for anything less…

Join us next Saturday for the Attract the RIGHT Man Masterclass!

In the Attract the RIGHT Man Masterclass, you’ll discover exactly what to stop doing and what to start doing, instead, so that you can easily let go of past toxic experiences and attract the perfect match for you.

You’ll learn how to easily and effortlessly attract the right man without wasting time, struggling, or settling.

These are the same steps we’ve taught and helped hundreds of women around the world meet the man they end up marrying in 30-90 days!

Why would you sentence yourself to “less than”?

Swipe Right on Love: Dating Strategies for Busy Women

by heartsdesireintl | May 22, 2023 | Coaching, Dating, HDI Blog, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, keeping the love alive, Love, Parenting, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Romance, Self-Love, Single Mother, Success, Successful Women

by Gladys Diaz

Do you struggle making time for your love life?

You may be a single mom and have a hard time finding a babysitter.

Maybe you travel a lot for work and find it hard to make time for dating or your partner.

Finding time for dating can feel challenging.

Juggling work commitments, household responsibilities, and parenting duties can make it seem that there’s little room for personal endeavors.

We get it.

Both Gladys and I are entrepreneurs running multiple businesses, wives, mothers, and dog-moms. We have clients, team members and family to take care of – on top of making time for our own work-outs, self-care and rest.

I remember when I was a single mom trying to make it all work and wondering if it was possible to have it all…

The thing to remember is that carving out time for romance is essential for self-care and building meaningful connections.

In this blog post, we’ll explore practical strategies and mindset shifts to help busy professionals and single moms make time for dating in their demanding lives.

#1: Make Your Love Life and Dating a Top Priority in Your Life

The first thing you must do is make dating a top priority. Right up there with taking care of yourself.

If you don’t make your love life a priority then another summer goes by and you’re still alone. Another birthday comes and goes and you aren’t spending it with the one you love.

Let’s get rid of regret and start creating your dreams NOW!

Dating isn’t just another thing you have to do and until you start relating to it as self-care and not an item to be checked off your list – only then will you start enjoying it and start creating the results you want!

#2: Prioritize Self-Care

As a single mom and professional, it’s crucial to prioritize self-care. When you don’t, you slowly begin to resent the people in your life that need you and want to spend time with you.

This puts you in low energy and makes it impossible to attract the things you want into your life!

When you prioritize taking care of yourself, you boost your well-being AND enhance your ability to be present and engaged in dating.

Set aside dedicated time each day and week for activities that rejuvenate you, such as exercise, meditating, praying, reading, pursuing a hobby (or sitting and doing nothing if that’s what you want to do)!

By nurturing your own happiness, you’ll be better equipped to navigate the complexities of dating while managing your all of your other responsibilities.

#3: Create Opportunities in Your Schedule to Date and Spend Time With Your Partner

Sometimes you get to be creative when you have a lot of priorities and are short on time.

Remember how I said we get it? We do!

Sometimes spending time together looks like long walks, movies and going to bed together.

And sometimes we get to be creative!

If Arnie and I have a particularly full day, we’ll wake up 15 minutes early so we can sit on the porch and have our coffee together.

Gladys and Ric go to lunch together every single Friday, which they’ve been doing for years!

Why?

Because prioritizing our relationships is important to us and it’s imperative to keeping the love alive!

If you’re looking at opportunities to meet men as something you dread or as a time-waster – it’s time to shift your mindset and embrace meeting men as something that is fun and worth it!

#4: Create a Structure for Your Time and Manage Your Time Well

You’re precious, your time is precious and you get to manage it well.

Prioritize your tasks, set realistic deadlines, plan dating into your calendar and create a structured schedule.

Look for pockets of time in your routine where you can squeeze in a date or a brief phone call with a potential partner.

TIP: You don’t need to be juggling 15 dating apps and chatting with 100 men at a time – now that might feel overwhelming!

You need to be on three dating apps with a profile that will attract the men who are a match for you!

If you don’t have that or you need support with your mindset or time management – Schedule a Love Breakthrough Call with a Coach!

As a busy professional and/or single mom, making time for dating can feel like an uphill battle. However, by shifting your mindset and making it a priority, prioritizing self-care, creating creative opportunities to date, creating a structure for it and managing your time well, you can successfully integrate dating into your busy life.

Remember, finding love and nurturing relationships is a vital aspect of personal growth and happiness!

And you get to have it ALL!

Rejection Hurts. Here’s How to Break Through Your Fear and Create Extraordinary Love NOW!

by heartsdesireintl | May 7, 2023 | breakups, Coaching, Communication, Dating, Forgiveness, HDI Blog, Heart's Desire International, Love, Ready to Love Again, Self-Love

by Gladys Diaz

Do you have a fear of being hurt or rejected?

If you don’t, you must be superhuman, because as human beings, we all deal with this!

And it doesn’t matter if you’re single or in a relationship, this message is for you!

It’s a common misconception that, once you get into a relationship, the fear of rejection or getting hurt goes away…

But that’s just not true.

The fear of rejection creates barriers to feeling like yourself and feeling safe in a relationship.

It holds you back from creating deep, intimate connections – whether you’re already in a relationship or seeking to create one.

No matter the reason you have this fear or how it manifests for you, the impact it creates is the same.

Here’s how it works…

You have a fear that something will or won’t happen in the future because of something that did or didn’t happen in the past.

This fear then causes you to react in a certain way, which is a coping mechanism for not getting hurt.

This may look like withdrawing from your partner or pulling back.

It may look like being paralyzed and feeling like you can’t do or say anything because of your fear that it will go badly.

It may look like pretending, acting as if everything is fine, when, actually, you’re feeling completely scared inside.

Here’s how it looked for me.

Because I was scared of being rejected, I was always trying to prove myself.

And it showed up in work, in my relationships, as a mother, everywhere.

My previous marriage was not a happy one.

I remember how I would feel every time I’d come home and put the key up to the door to open it.

Each time, I would stop and feel my chest tighten as I wondered what I was about to encounter on the other side of the door – and hoping that today might be a good day.

My fear of being alone and needing to be accepted caused me to stay in that unhappy relationship where I was treated in ways that are now absolutely unimaginable to me.

I would stay quiet and pretend that everything was fine, and then I couldn’t really understand what was real and what I really wanted.

So why does this matter for you?

Do you accept behavior or communication that isn’t aligned with what you want because you’re afraid of being rejected?

Do you feel like your feelings won’t be validated because you fear you’ll be used or get hurt.

When fear is running the show you feel powerless, and that’s not the way we want you to feel!!

So how do you overcome these fears?

The first thing you need to do is – recognize and acknowledge the fear.

When you recognize yourself in the space where the fear is coming to the surface, ask yourself these two questions.

What is it that you’re afraid of that’s stopping you from having the relationship you want to have?

If I didn’t have this fear and was standing inside my power, who would I be that would allow me to make a different choice?

When you acknowledge your fear, get curious about it and own it – you allow yourself to step into your power and know that you get to choose how you feel and behave.

The truth is…

You can either be run by your fears or run by your ability to choose a different experience.

When you don’t break through your fear, the fear chooses for you!

When you transform yourself – YOU get to choose.

You get to create the Extraordinary Love that you imagine!

If you’d like to overcome your fear of rejection so you can get into the relationship of your dreams by this summer – yes, you read that right, THIS SUMMER…

Then click HERE to schedule a Love Breakthrough Call with one of our fabulous Love Coaches.

Once you transform something, you don’t go back to it.

Take this opportunity for yourself to overcome the fears that are holding you back in love and relationships!

3 Steps to Stop Doubting Yourself and Attract the RIGHT Man NOW!

by heartsdesireintl | Mar 7, 2023 | Coaching, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Intimacy, Love, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Self-Love, Success

by Gladys Diaz

Do you ever doubt yourself?

Do you ever question whether or not you’ve made the right decision about a career move, whether or not to keep dating someone you’ve grown to care about, or where to live?

What does it feel like to not be able to trust yourself to make the best decisions for your future?

One of the top things we hear from women, successful, driven, passionate women like you, is that they have a hard time trusting themselves.

And that lack of self-trust leaves them feeling disempowered and afraid.

When you can’t trust yourself life becomes a lot more scary than it actually is!

Whether you’re looking for a love that will take you around the world, bring you children and an expanded family or simply love and support in your already amazing life, we’re certain that you want your intuition to guide you to a good man who’ll be a good match for you and all of your hopes and dreams.

So what if you don’t trust yourself to find him?

What if you worry that your “picker” is broken or that you always choose the “wrong” men?

When you don’t trust yourself then what chooses for you isn’t you.

What chooses instead are your fears.

Your thoughts that you’re not good enough…

The fear of ending up alone forever…

Remembering all the “wrong” men you’ve attracted in the past and disbelief that anything will ever be any different.

Thinking you’ll be taken advantage of like you were before…

When these are the thoughts swirling around in your mind it’s debilitating and life and love feel scary as hell.

So how do you break through these fears and begin to trust you again?

Acceptance. First you get to accept yourself and everything about your past.

If you allow your past to determine your future you’ll always feel like you have something to prove, like there’s something to overcome, like you have to work to not become your mother or make the same mistakes you’ve already made.

Your past doesn’t have to define you, tell you who you are or let you know what you can expect of your future.
Forgiveness. Second, you get to forgive the version of you that chose the painful experiences of the past so you can heal and move forward.

You get to remove the emotional charge behind the memories so that they no longer have power to influence your present and future.
Clarity. After you’ve healed your past you can stand powerfully in who you are in the present. Then, and only then, can you be clear about what you want for your future.

Once you have crystal clarity around what it is that you want to experience in a relationship, you’ll be able to stand for the man and relationship you want instead of settling for whatever’s there.

It’s incredible what opens up when you’re able to accept and love yourself fully!

When you know what you want and can be yourself without reservation you feel happier and more comfortable with yourself because the real you is showing up!

Your intuition becomes stronger and you’re more and more able to make the decisions that are right for you quickly and without reservation or doubt.

And…

You’re able to attract the type of men that you WANT to be with and that want to be with the real you too!

If that’s something you want, then join us on Saturday for the Attract the RIGHT Man Masterclass!

In this fun, interactive 3-hour workshop, you’ll:

Identify the barrier that have the fears and doubts show up instead of the right man
Gain Clarity about what you want in a relationship
Discover what men are looking for and what repels them
Manifest the life and love your heart desires for a LIFETIME

If that’s what you want – then click HERE to register for this free event!

Once you register, you’ll receive love notes throughout the rest of this week so you can receive support in love starting NOW and so you can come prepared on Saturday to meet the RIGHT man now!

We can’t wait to see you there!

The ONE Thing You Need to Know to Attract TRUE LOVE Into Your Life!

by heartsdesireintl | Feb 13, 2023 | Coaching, Communication, Dating, Heart's Desire International, Love, Ready to Love Again, Relationship, Relationship Advice, Self-Love

by Gladys Diaz

Do you ever wonder whether or not extraordinary love is possible for you?

Do you fear you’ll never find someone who will see you, love you, hear you and want to share a life with you?

If you answered yes to either of those questions, you’re not alone and…

I know how you feel because I felt the exact same way for years.

After my husband cheated on me and we got divorced, putting myself out in the dating game again was not only hard and terrifying – it left me feeling doubtful and discouraged that I’d ever find someone who would love me again.

It wasn’t until I discovered the secret I’m going to share with you today that my love life, and whole life actually, were transformed.

This secret isn’t about doing something “more” or “better” than you’ve done in the past.

It points back to ONE fundamental thing and if you don’t know how to create this ONE thing, it will lead you to 5, 10, 20 more years of not creating the love and life that you want.

When I look back at who I was and what my life looked like BEFORE I learned this secret and who I became and how my life transformed AFTER, it’s like looking at 2 different lives!

What it all boiled down to was this…

Really being IN the experience of being in love with myself.

And not in a conceited, arrogant or entitled way.

And not in a weekly massages and pedicures kind of way either.

Loving myself at a deep, raw, true level so that when I looked in the mirror, I didn’t compare myself to my best friend or the actress on TV. I didn’t wish my thighs were smaller or that my teeth were straighter.

And when I looked myself in the eyes, I didn’t wish I was funnier, smarter or more successful.

I knew in my heart that I was enough, that I was love-able and that I would find someone else who felt the same.

And once I became whole in that way – only then was I able to create something extraordinary with someone else.

That’s the secret to creating real love and that’s why we’re hosting the Self-Love Secret Mission Challenge this week!

When you develop this type of love within yourself you:

💖 Have the courage to be who you really are

💖 Don’t have to spend days, months, years, (or even minutes!) recovering when someone makes you feel unloveable

💖 Communicate in a way that exemplifies true love and true power

💖 Speak your “truth” without having it look like your anger on a loud speaker.

💖Know at the ultimate level that you’re enough and be able to create an extraordinary relationship with another human being who knows and feels the same

Because until you develop this deep love within yourself, no one else’s love will make a difference.

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day and we’re committed to YOU elevating what you’re doing in life and love so that you can have everything you dream of!

The Self-Love Secret Mission Challenge begins TONIGHT at 6pm EST and you get to be there!

This week can be the week that bridges the gap between where you are now and where you want to be because your love for yourself expands.

Here’s what ladies have said about the transformation this challenge created for them:

“My biggest takeaway from the Self-Love Secret Mission is that I am more than enough just as I am, and that I am my biggest champion! I now believe with all my heart that I will attract a high-quality man with whom I will create the relationship of my dreams! I highly recommend this challenge to anyone willing to love themselves like never before. You will truly fall in love with yourself!” -Cari

“Before I did The Self-Love Secret Mission, I felt stuck and like I needed change in my life and some direction. During the mission, I learned that self-love is a holistic act in that you feed your self with love, talk to yourself with love, eat food and think loving thoughts about yourself. I realized that I’ve been so negative about being in a relationship for years so now it’s just a process of noticing my self-talk, changing my limiting beliefs, and knowing I don’t have to do it all on my own. I seriously felt the best when I was doing this, and I totally want to get back into that energy again, where crazy magical things were happening!” -Anna

You get to experience extraordinary love from the INSIDE OUT!

When you learn to love yourself at this deep level, your confidence, compassion, trust, communication increase. And the list goes on – because it touches everything!

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